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SPOILER WARNING
The reviews on this page are typically of the type that
describe the plot in detail. So if you don't want to know then best avoid looking.
| Writer: Bernard MacLaverty / Director: Pat O'Connor / Producers: Stuart Craig, David Puttnam | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 98 mins |
| Tom 'Cal' McClusky is a shy young catholic man living in Northern Ireland who would rather not get involved in the political situation but finds himself socially pressurised by his peers into becoming active in the IRA struggles to rid their country of British occupation. His aversion towards violence is manifest but he reluctantly agrees to occasionally drive getaway cars to appease the local manipulative recruiter who piles on the psychological pressure of his supposed obligations to engage in the struggles hinting at the risk of being ostracised or worse if he fails to help when needed.
Cal is currently out of work and does casual odd-jobs. After doing some potato gathering work for a local farm run by the Morton family he is offered a full time position as a general farmhand. There he properly meets Marcella Morton whom he has seen around and about town where she works at the local library. Even though she is a bit older than himself he has developed a crush on her although he has been too shy to talk to her properly. She is the farmer's daughter-in-law who still lives with her in-laws even though her husband (their son) was killed a year ago by the IRA. Robert Morton had been a policeman who was gunned down by a masked man calling at their door one evening. Cal tries to keep a low-profile away from any contact with the local IRA membership because he does not wish to become involved in any more violence - so he moves into one of the farm's out-houses. He has more opportunities to be alone with Marcella when her in-laws go away for a while. Cal feels great empathy for her loss although it begins to become apparent that maybe he feels a sense of guilt as well. Marcella is feeling lonely and he is a loner and before long they begin a sexual affair. Cal is found by the IRA recruiter and made to feel obligated to drive a car for them in an example-setting knee-capping punishment that needs to be carried out. But it all goes wrong and they are stopped at a British roadblock. The others are caught but Cal gets away back to the farmhouse. We now find out that it was he who drove the car a year ago when Marcella's husband was murdered and he feels immense shame and guilt at his involvement. He feels the need to tell Marcella what he did and although he doesn't tell the whole story he says enough that she can guess the rest. He then waits for the police to arrive and he is arrested. | |
| Starring: | John Lynch (as Tom 'Cal' McClusky), Helen Mirren (as Marcella Morton), Catherine Gibson (as Mrs Morton, Marcella's mother-in-law), Donal McCann (as Shamie, Cal's father) |
| Featuring: | John Kavanagh (as Skeffington, IRA recruiter), Ray McAnally (as Cyril Dunlop, ?Farm Manager?), Stevan Rimkus (as Crilly, young IRA activist) |
| Writer: Gore Vidal / Director: Tinto Brass / Producers: Bob Guccione, Franco Rossellini | |
| Type: Historical Drama | Running Time: various versions |
| Set in Pagan Rome in the period 37AD-41AD when Roman society was decadent and the rich and privileged enjoyed the debauched excesses of life. Caligula is a young man in his mid-20s who is set to inherit the entire Roman empire when his 77-year-old grandfather Tiberius Caesar dies. The emperor of Rome is essentially ruler of the world and has supreme power over all men that is only kept in check by the senate which passes and upholds laws. Tiberius is a fearsome ruler who aware of his encroaching frailty is reconsidering if his choice of his adoptive grandson Caligula as his successor is for the best. He now has a blood grandson called Gemellus who might be suitable and there is always his weak-willed nephew Claudius whose timid nature has saved him from assassination - which emperors clandestinely employ to rid themselves of strong rivals.
When Tiberius falls gravely ill Caligula is told he may nevertheless hang on to life for months with proper treatment which is frustrating to Caligula who is impatient for power. The guard commander Macro is fiercely loyal to Caligula and with the appropriate indication from the emperor-apparent he smothers the ailing emperor Tiberius to death and Caligula is hailed as the next Caesar. Once he takes over as emperor Caligula becomes intoxicated with the power at his command. He has the word of life and death over all and his every petty whim is obeyed however strange or perverse. One of his first actions is to have his loyal friend Macro arrested and executed for the murder of Tiberius. The love of his life is his own sister Drusilla with whom he has an incestual relationship and wishes he could marry. Drusilla is the only one able to advise Caligula of his mistakes without fear of death and he respects her wisdom. She advises her brother that he should take a wife and he selects a promiscuous priestess of Isis called Caesonia under the condition that he will marry her when she bears him an heir. Aware of the boy Gemellus who may have his own ambitions to take the emperor's mantle he finds a pretext to have him arrested for treason and disposed of. The ineffectual Claudius is not considered a threat by Claudius and is given an adviser's position. When Caesonia bears him a child he marries her mid-labour only to discover it is a daughter. Soon after this his beloved sister Drusilla falls gravely ill with fever and dies. With the loss of the one influence in his life that was able to reign in his worst excesses, Caligula becomes free to act on his every petty fancy - humiliating authority figures and disposing of any who would speak against him. He strips outspoken senators of their wealth and leaves them destitute; and opens an Imperial brothel to humiliate the senators' wives; and even pretends to invade Britain to boost his stature amongst his subjects. Caligula begins to perceive people as playthings that he can toy with at his perverse whim and sees himself as a god. Caligula's closest advisers realise that their emperor is losing his grip on reality - he has become a tyrant who cannot be allowed to continue to arbitrarily overrule the senate and humiliate Rome's most important families. So after three years of rule the plotters assassinate Caligula and his wife and child in the senate and hail an astonished Claudius as the new emperor Caesar. | |
| Starring: | Malcolm McDowell (as Caligula), Helen Mirren (as Caesonia, Caligula's wife), Peter O'Toole (as Emperor Tiberius Caesar), John Gielgud (as Nerva, senator), Teresa Ann Savoy (as Drusilla, Caligula's sister) |
| Featuring: | John Steiner (as Longinus, adviser), Guido Mannari (as Macro, guard commander - voiced by Patrick Allen), Paolo Bonacelli (as Chaerea, new guard commander), Giancarlo Badessi (as Claudius, Caligula's uncle), Adriana Asti (as Ennia, wife of Macro), Bruno Brive (as Gemellus, Tiberous's grandson), Mirella Dangelo (as Livia, a bride) |
| NOTES: | |
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There are various versions of this movie with the shortest about 90 minutes and the longest 155 minutes. |
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Although sometimes considered to be a porn movie it is actually a lavish big-budget epic production with a high-profile mainstream cast which uses its scenes of explicit material (involving extras) to illustrate the depravity and excesses of the period that leaves nothing to the imagination (depending on the version being seen). The shorter version is a reasonably acceptable film albeit with a degree of in-context nudity. The longer version does go a bit too far in places in its depiction of orgies and naked depravity. It is an Italian/American production made in English and is reviewed here because of the starring roles of many British actors. |
| Writer: James Mitchell / Director: Don Sharp / Producer: Derek Horne | |
| Type: Thriller | Running Time: 100 mins |
| David Callan is an ex-security services agent who had specialised in covert assassinations and was the best in the business. However he was forcibly retired from service eighteen months ago when he began to develop a conscience and only carry out kill-orders if he was in agreement that the target deserved to die which made him a liability to his superiors. He was found a civilian bookkeeping job which he finds dull and has a boss who treats him with disdain because he believes Callan to be an ex-convict to whom he is giving a break.
When Callan's ex-boss Charlie Hunter recalls the former agent back to HQ for a meeting it is to offer him an opportunity to prove himself fit for duty again by carrying out the killing of man considered a danger. The man's details are held in one of the department's Red Files which signify an individual in need of special observation and possible extreme sanction. The man in question is a German businessman called Rudolph Schneider which surprises Callan because he knows the man whose offices share the same building as his own. Callan has always found Schneider to be an agreeable and harmless enough seeming man with a boyish enthusiasm for playing war games with model soldiers. Callan asks Hunter to explain to him what Schneider is supposed to have done but Hunter refuses to tell him and insists he just carry out the hit with no questions asked. The killing must be made at the man's home and not look like an accident so as to act as an object lesson for others in his line of work. However Callan has not changed and begins to make his own investigations into Schneider's background to try and establish for himself what danger he represents. He poses as a fellow model soldier enthusiast and becomes friendly with the man to gain an invite to his home so he can carry out the hit when and if he determines it is merited. Callan's discovers that Schneider is secretly an illegal weapons importer and he becomes satisfied that the death of the man is justified and tells Hunter he will carry out the orders. However Hunter has been disappointed that Callan has proven himself unchanged and unwilling to follow orders without first conducting his own independent line of enquiries - he has therefore decided that after the assassination is made Callan must be dealt with. To this end he sends his second best agent (after Callan) called Toby Meres to make sure Callan is found unconscious at the scene so he will be arrested and imprisoned for the murder - to which the Secret Services will disavow having any connection should Callan attempt to claim he was an agent working under orders. Meanwhile however the shrewd Schneider has become suspicious of Callan and nearly turns the tables on him - but Callan eventually manages to outmanoeuvre and kill him. Then Meres becomes involved to carry out Hunter's secondary instructions - but Callan had been expecting such a move and it is Meres who becomes the man left unconscious at the scene to be discovered by the police. Callan phones Hunter to tell him the job is done but that Meres will take the rap instead of himself. Hunter offers Callan his old job back but Callan tells him what he can do with it and breaks off contact. Hunter ponders and then instructs his secretary to transfer Callan's current dossier into a Red File - making him a marked man. THE END | |
| Starring: | Edward Woodward (as David Callan), Eric Porter (as Charlie Hunter, Callan's security services boss), Carl Mohner (as Rudolph Schneider, Callan's target), Peter Egan (as Toby Meres, security agent), Russell Hunter (as Lonely, Callan's underworld snout) |
| Featuring: | Catherine Schell (as Jenny Fisher, Schneider's girlfriend), Kenneth Griffith (as Waterman, Callan's civilian job boss), Michael da Costa (as The Greek, gun merchant), Don Henderson (as Schneider's chauffeur), Nadim Sawalha (as Schneider's business contact), Veronica Lang (as Hunter's secretary) |
| Familiar Faces: | Dave Prowse (as The Greek's heavy) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the novel A Red File for Callan by James Mitchell |
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This film is a movie spin-off of a TV series that began as a TV play called "A Magnum for Schneider" in the ITV Armchair Theatre series. It first aired in February 1967. This became the pilot episode to the TV series Callan which ran for 43 episodes additional episodes over 4 series beginning in July 1967 and continuing until 1972. This film followed (although it was actually a remake of the pilot episode and didn't continue the series). Finally there was a TV movie in 1981 called Wet Job. All versions have had Edward Woodward playing Callan and Russell Hunter as Lonely. |
| Writer: Alan Jay Lerner / Director: Joshua Logan / Producer: Jack L. Warner | |
| Type: Musical | Running Time: 168 mins |
| Set in medieval Britain. When King Pendragon died without an heir a contest of brave champions was staged to choose a worthy successor. The victor would win the right to attempt to pull a famous sword embedded in a rock which according to legend could only be drawn by one destined to be king. Anyone able to do this would be hailed sovereign. But no one had ever been able to move the trapped sword an iota. A young lad called Arthur was in attendance squiring for his cousin knight. Arthur had foolishly forgotten his cousin's sword, so when he saw the sword in the stone he decided to take that and save himself a trip home. Unaware of its great significance he took the sword and casually drew it and it slid from its stone sheath with ease. Lowly Arthur was proclaimed King of All-England.
Many years later after Arthur has become accustomed to his exalted position his life changes again when he agrees to a marriage of convenience to a woman he has never met. He is dreading the prospect and his wife-to-be Lady Guenevere is similarly apprehensive. But when they meet they truly fall in love and create a strong marriage in which Arthur feels inspired towards greatness and involves his queen in all his decisions. England is a mishmash of loose kingdoms ruled over by lords intent on preserving their hard-fought power by waging war on their neighbours. Arthur despairs at all the unnecessary bloodshed and becomes determined to change all that and unify England under a common ideal. He proposes a new order of chivalry in which a legion of honest and dedicated knights will use their might for right. They will help settle disputes using justice and fairness with a set of laws that apply to all men equally. The knights will convene in Camelot at a round table so-shaped to afford all who sit there an equal status. The word of King Arthur's initiative reaches all corners of the kingdom as he sends out a summons to knights everywhere to attend and listen to his new proposals. News reaches even across the waters to France where Lancelot Du Lac is inspired to answer the call. Lancelot is imbued with a supreme confidence of his own magnificence that to others makes him appear arrogantly conceited but in himself he knows it to be true. He has a serenity of purpose that sets him apart as someone special. Lancelot's high-minded principals are just what Arthur needed and soon Lancelot becomes his most important friend, ally and linchpin in formulating the framework of the idealistic new order. Arthur's vision for a better society is embraced by the people weary of conflict. Under the king's benevolent rule fairness for all becomes a guiding principle smoothed along by the noble knight's stoic stewardship. One of the foundations of the new order is the right to a trial at which proof of crime must be presented and no one with power can subvert justice to suit their own ends. With these sweeping reforms, England enters a golden age of peace. At first Guenevere perceived Lancelot to be a pretentious egotist whom she readily makes fun of. But when Lancelot performs a deed that substantiates all his claims of greatness, Guenevere begins to see him through different eyes. They fall in love and begin a secret affair. Arthur is aware of rumours circulating about his wife's infidelity but enters a state of denial refusing to acknowledge any possibility that his wife and best friend could betray him so. Any knights or courtiers who attempt to apprise the King of the situation are exiled from Camelot. The injustice appals Arthur but he knows if he were to acknowledge the Queen's infidelity he would be required to condemn her to death for treachery and his love for her is too great to allow that to happen. The situation causes disquiet amongst Arthur's knights who do not know where they stand and feel aggrieved that many of their kin have been exiled for trying to speak the truth. Amid this unease arrives a young man from Scotland called Mordred who turns out to be the illegitimate son of Arthur, conceived in a brief liaison when the monarch was still a commoner. Mordred claims he wants to become a knight but it soon becomes clear he is plotting against Arthur for the right to claim his birthright. Mordred raises an army consisting of banished knights and uses them to enforce his claim to be Arthur's successor. Mordred is determined to hasten that succession and he exposes Guenevere's infidelity with proof that Arthur is forced to acknowledge. Arthur cannot subvert the justice that he so stoutly championed and Guenevere is sentenced to death for treachery. To Arthur's relief Guenevere is rescued at the last moment by Lancelot and taken away into the forest. Lancelot returns to France and Guenevere joins an order of nuns. Mordred's attack on the foundation of the new order has shattered the ideal that Arthur worked so hard to realise and brings the age of peace and prosperity to a crashing halt with only bloodshed and mayhem now on the horizon. Mordred's army is massing and Arthur is preparing his own armies for an engagement that will decide the future course of England. Whatever the outcome Arthur knows his golden age is over. His only hope is that his legacy will live on and be reborn in the next generation who have grown up under his providence and will prefer to eschew disorder and live in benign times once again. | |
| Comment: The film is also a musical and there are frequent interludes where the characters burst into song. | |
| Starring: | Richard Harris (as King Arthur), Vanessa Redgrave (as Guenevere, Arthur's wife), Franco Nero (as Lancelot Du Lac, noble knight from France), David Hemmings (as Mordred, Arthur's illegitimate son) |
| Featuring: | Lionel Jeffries (as King Pellinore, guest at Camelot), Laurence Naismith (as Merlyn, young Arthur's wise tutor, [flashback cameo only]), Nicolas Beauvy (as Arthur as a boy) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the play "Camelot". Book and lyrics by Alan Jay Lerner; Music by Frederick Loewe; Directed by Moss Hart; Produced on the stage by Jenny Productions. From "The Once and Future King" by T.H. White |
| Writers: Herman Raucher, Anthony Newley / Director/Producer: Anthony Newley | |
| Type: Comedy / Music | Running Time: 106 mins |
| FULL TITLE: Can Hieronymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness?
Hieronymous Merkin has just turned 40 and has been making a movie of his life so far which he is showing to his mother and his young children. We also see the movie in production and the "rushes" of parts already filmed as Merkin's early life is unfolded:- from his early days under the tutelage of variety performer Uncle Limelight, which inspired him to become a music hall star himself under the guidance of his manager Goodtime Eddie Filth, and regular interventions from a mystical joke-telling Presence. The adult Merkin is a serial womaniser who has a string of lovers as his stage shows become ever more successful. Later on he meets his idealistic vision of a young womanly loveliness in Mercy Humppe and also the future mother of his children Polyester Poontang - and he has to make the big decision of which woman he wants most to be with. | |
| Comment: A rather unusual film which makes some kind of sense within itself but is somewhat dull and drawn out in places. Nearly all the scenes are filmed on a beach which is minimalistically dressed to represent whichever location the scene takes place in - be that Church, Hospital, Theatre or Bedroom. | |
| Starring: | Anthony Newley (as Hieronymous Merkin) |
| Featuring: | Joan Collins (as Polyester Poontang), Patricia Hayes (as Merkin's mother), Bruce Forsyth (as Uncle Limelight). Judy Cornwell (as Filigree Fondle), Connie Kreski (as Mercy Humppe) |
| Familiar Faces: | Julian Orchard |
| Starlets: | Margaret Nolan, Yolanda, Sally Douglas, Gilly Grant, Margo Segrave, Sue Shepherd |
| NOTES: | |
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Connie Kreski receives an "introducing" credit. |
| Can I Come Too? (1979) | Previous Next |
| Writer/Producer: Alan Selwyn / Director: Ray Selfe | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 37 mins |
| Mr Royal of a small suburban Savoy cinema is delighted that his movie house has been selected to premiere the latest high-class soft porn film from Glowpick Pictures called Love In The Undergrowth starring up and coming actress Gloria Overtones. He has been busy sprucing the place up, inviting town dignitaries and getting his lusty usherettes to wear glamorous showgirl costumes.
He makes an arrangement with his friend George Skinner of the local restaurant to host the after-film party as a way of helping Mr Skinner's general despondency over the downturn in his business since his glamorous and customer-popular waitress daughter Maisie left him a few years ago. He hasn't seen or heard anything from her since that time. Gloria is getting ready to attend the premiere and will be bringing her upper class boyfriend Roddy and his mother Lady Wickhampton. At the cinema Terry the projectionist is forever preoccupied having sex with the usherette Sylvie and then the relief projectionist Georgina - consequently the movie is started at reel two although none of the audience or critics seem to notice thinking it is just the film being trendy by jumping straight into the action without any introductions to the characters. The screening is successful and at the dinner afterwards Mr Skinner is amazed to discover that Gloria Overtones is actually his long-missing daughter Maisie. | |
| Starring: | Charlie Chester (as Mr Royal, manager of Savoy cinema) |
| Featuring: | Tony Wright (as George Skinner, restaurant owner), Chic Murray (as Manny McTavish, Gloria's agent), Jean May Selfe (as Lady Wickhampton, Roddy's mother), Mark Jones (as Freddy Lawrence, Glowpick Pictures' publicist), Graham White (as Terry, projectionist at Savoy), Clive Wouters (as Roddy Wickhampton, Gloria's boyfriend), Lou Raynes (as Manny Glowpick, film studio producer) |
| Familiar Faces: | Rita Webb (as Laverne, cleaner) |
| Starlets: | Susie Silvey (as Gloria Overtones, actress, [credited as Susan Silviy]), Lindy Benson (as Maxine, usherette), Maria Harper (as Sylvie Denby, usherette), Sue Longhurst (as Vera Ball, ticket counter cashier at Savoy), Julia Rushford (as Georgina, relief projectionist), Vicki Scott (as Girl in opening title sequence, uncredited) |
| Writer: Robin Gough / Director: Jim Atkinson / Producer: Elton Hawke | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 90 mins |
| Gil Masters has great difficulty keeping a job because he routinely finds himself in compromising looking situations with women at work and gets sacked. His girlfriend sets him a challenge:- if he can hold a job down for one week she will marry him, but if he loses the job he has to undergo an embarrassing forfeit. He gets himself a job as a general domestic handyman and needless to say his week is filled with women trying to bed him while his girlfriend keeps tabs on his progress. | |
| Starring: | Jeremy Bulloch (as Gil Masters), Jill Damas (as Gil's girlfriend) |
| Featuring: | Neil Hallett |
| Star-Turns: | Richard O'Sullivan |
| Starlets: | Sue Longhurst, Olivia Munday, Jenny Cox, Venicia Day, Maria Coyne, Lynn Ross, Valerie Phillips, Frances Bennett, Sally Harrison, Valerie Leon, Wendy Wax, Sarah Frampton, Stephanie Marrian, Lindsay Marsh, Mandy Morris |
| NOTES: | |
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Jill Damas receives an "introducing" credit. |
| Writers: Eugenio Martín, Tony Fos / Director: Eugenio Martín / Executive Producer: José López Moreno | |
| Type: European / Horror | Running Time: 83 mins |
| In the present day in a small Spanish village two spinster sisters called Marta and Veronica run a small guest house which was a former convent. The community has very traditional religious values and the sisters find it infuriating that they have to tolerate the shameful antics of some of the tourists especially the type of young women whose mode of dress and loose flirtatious style offends and scandalises their sensibilities.
When they catch one young English woman called May Barkley sunbathing topless on their roof terrace in full view of some nearby overlooking houses Marta loses patience and demands she leave immediately and in order to hasten her departure pushes her forward at the top of the stairs. Unfortunately May trips and falls down the stairs and is killed when her head smashes into a stained glass window. Veronica is scared that they will be arrested but Marta tells her it was an accident and declares it was a punishment from God for the woman's indecency and that they were merely the means of its enactment. Marta is the more dominant and hard-lined of the sisters and persuades Veronica to help her dispose of the body. But as they are dealing with that matter another English woman arrives to take up her booking. She is May's sister Laura who has just arrived in Spain to meet up with her sister who was on a working holiday photographing paintings at a museum for a British catalogue. Laura is therefore very surprised to be told that May left this morning without leaving any messages. Laura takes up her room hoping May will come back or call to let her know what's going on. Laura, who is a more soberly dressed person by nature, meets with Gerta's approval although she finds her presence somewhat awkward. Laura makes enquiries with the local taxis and bus firms but no one can recall taking a young English woman that day. She asks at the museum and meets a man called Eduardo who knew May and had been expecting to meet her later for a date. All in all Laura finds her sister's departure very perplexing. Back at the hotel a new arrival is causing Gerta more concerns - she is a happy outgoing young Dutch girl called Helen Miller who spends her day wearing hot pants and behaving in a friendly bubbly way towards the local men which Gerta finds indecent. Laura makes casual friends with her and is amazed when the next day she is told that Gerta suddenly left just like May had done. We know that Helen has been disposed of by the sisters but this time by deliberate murder and not as the result of an accident. Gerta has come to the conclusion that God is sending these shameful women to them for a purpose - to be punished. She has no guilty conscience about it and knows that following God's will cannot be evil. When Gerta makes derogatory comments about such shameless women as May and Helen insinuating that their departure from the hotel is no great loss, Laura decides to book out because she objects to the way Gerta is always criticising friendly outgoing people who just want to dress more comfortably in a style that is perfectly acceptable to most people. On her way out she meets a new arrival called Norma who has a young baby with her and they briefly chat. Laura then books in at a large hotel nearby where she meets up again with Eduardo and shares her ongoing concerns and she talks to the local mayor but he says that women like the sisters are simply from a different age and one has to tolerate their more old fashioned views. At the hotel the sisters find Norma a most acceptable guest. She has told them her husband was unable to come with them and the sisters are so pleased to have a little baby in the place that they can coo and fuss over. But later Norma makes a comment in the local shop that makes the shopkeeper think she is unmarried and doesn't know where the father is. This comment reaches the sisters' ears and Gerta becomes outraged that Norma is really unmarried with a baby and they vow to save the baby from the shameful mother by delivering it to a monastery to be brought up properly with respectable values. They take the baby from the room while Norma has briefly popped out leaving him sleeping - and when Norma tries to get her baby back Gerta stabs her in the back. When later they discover she was married after all but was divorcing her husband this is considered just as bad by Gerta as she seeks to justify their mistake. Laura has been keeping in contact with Helen and when she is told that she too has apparently departed without warning she knows something is seriously wrong and is determined to get some proof. So Laura and Eduardo book back into the guest house with him posing as her newly arrived husband and in the night they go searching around the hotel for some evidence of wrongdoing. Eduardo discovers the bodies have been hidden in the cellar inside large vats of wine but Gerta catches him and he too is killed. Then Gerta and Veronica turn their attention to Laura stalking her through the locked up hotel armed with knives as Laura desperately searches for a way out. As the sisters advance on her the curtains part and outside the window a posse of townspeople have turned up to arrest the women as Laura looks out pleadingly as she's about to be killed. | |
| Explanatory Comment: I didn't work it into the flow of the above summary but the townspeople were there at the end because earlier on a hotel guest had fallen ill after drinking some wine and the doctor had discovered a pickled eye in her drink which was sent off for analysis and when it was discovered to be human they sent a posse to go and arrest the women and investigate turning up at the critical moment. We don't actually know if Laura survived because the image faded to black at the point when she sees the people outside but I suppose it's reasonable to assume she was rescued. | |
| Starring: | Judy Geeson (as Laura Barkley), Aurora Bautista (as Marta), Esperanza Roy (as Veronica) |
| Featuring: | Lone Fleming (as Helen Miller, Dutch tourist), Blanche Estrada (as Norma, young mother with baby), Charley Pineiro (as Luis, Veronica's young lover), Vic Winner (as ?Eduardo?) |
| Starlets: | Loretta Tovar (as May Barkley, Laura's sister) |
| NOTES: | |
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This Spanish film is reviewed her because of the involvement of British actress Judy Geeson. The original Spanish title was Una Vela para el diablo. The version reviewed was titled as per this entry and was in English. |
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The director and co-writer was credited under the name of Eugene Martin |
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Blanche Estrada's nudity may have been a body double as her face is unseen. |
| Candleshoe (1977) | Previous Next |
| Writers: David Swift, Rosemary Anne Sisson / Director: Norman Tokar / Producer: Ron Miller | |
| Type: Crime Caper | Running Time: 96 mins |
| In Los Angeles, young American teenager Casey Brown is a tomboy tearaway orphan girl for whom lawbreaking is a fun pastime. She lives with uncaring foster parents who are only too glad to see the back of her when they are offered cash in return by a gruff English confidence trickster called Harry Bundage.
Harry has selected Casey because he wants her to join him in an amazing hustle he has lined up for which she perfectly fits the bill. A decade beforehand a rich English family had had a car accident in which the parents were tragically killed, but their three-year old daughter Lady Margaret St Edmund was mysteriously never found - dead or alive. Casey perfectly fits the age that the child would now have been and even has a scar on her back that matches one Margaret was known to have from a horse riding accident. Harry does not believe she is actually Margaret but he wants to pass her off to the missing girl's grandmother as the real thing for the plan he has in mind. For a suitable cut of the spoils Casey agrees to help and they both travel to England. Harry's cousin Clara Grimsworthy is an ex-maid who worked at Candleshoe, the ancestral home of the missing girl, from before the time she disappeared until recently when she was sacked for stealing. Before Clara departed she had discovered during her cleaning duties an ancient document secreted in a hidden compartment of an antique bedpost and brought it to Harry. It is the will of pirate captain Joshua St Edmund from the 18th century in which he describes how he hid a vast treasure booty of gold Spanish doubloons within Candleshoe. Harry knows this trove has never been discovered and he is determined to find it himself and become rich. The will contains a clue which once solved will lead to another clue, and so on until the trail of clues leads eventually to the location of the treasure. But Harry needs someone on the inside to find and solve the clues hence the deception of using Casey. Cousin Clara's inside knowledge of what the young Margaret was like enables her to train Casey up on all the things the little girl would have known before her disappearance, including her dietary likes and dislikes, in order to convince the grandmother Lady St Edmond she is the genuine article. Harry meets with Lady St Edmund posing as a Private Detective who claims to have discovered Margaret in America while working on another case and wants no reward but seeks only to at long last reunite the poor girl with her real family. With a few flashes of supposed memory that Casey can throw in as things she vaguely remembers snatches of from a former "forgotten" life, Lady St Edmund is convinced she is really her long-lost granddaughter and Casey is taken in as one of the family. Candleshoe is a vast estate house but it soon becomes clear that the family have fallen on hard times with the rates and taxes a constant worry. Most items of value have been sold off already and only public open day tours and produce-selling keep things afloat. Lady St Edmund has one faithful butler called Priory and lives with four children from a nearby orphanage whom she took in as overspill some years before and they have now become like part of her family. While doing her best to fit in Casey starts tracking down the clues without arousing suspicion. The household are very close-knit in support of Lady St Edmund and are clearly very fond of her. Priory the butler engages in mild deception by adopting various alternate guises so that her ladyship will believe she has a larger staff and finances are not quite as desperate as they really are. The children are all in on the well-meaning subterfuge and Casey becomes drawn into their world becoming less keen on the idea of swindling them out of the hidden treasure - which they don't even know they have but would solve all their financial problems if they did. But Harry is around to gee her on and keep her focussed on the task at hand as she successfully solves several of the clues. The rates and taxes are due and Priory and the kids have saved just enough to cover them for another year - but then that money is callously stolen by Harry so he can pay his gambling debts and Casey is unable to stop him. Now with no means to pay the taxes Lady St Edmund is forced to put the estate up for sale and is set to move into an old peoples home and the kids are to move back into the orphanage. Casey has been charmed by the abounding mutual loyalty and affection they all hold and was appalled by Harry's selfish act so she turns against him and tells the family what she has been up to. Together they put their heads together to try to solve the final clue and they return to the now empty Candleshoe which still belongs to Lady St Edmund for one more day. They find Harry and his henchmen ransacking the place randomly looking for the treasure and a big knockabout fight ensues between the two groups. Eventually the fight ends with pirate captain Joshua's statue being knocked over which brings down a false ceiling and the treasure of gold doubloons pours down. The police arrive to arrest Harry and his cohorts and Candleshoe is saved. Casey slopes off thinking she will be unwelcome for her part in the whole affair, but kind-hearted Lady St Edmund realising she is a reformed character offers to let her stay as one of the family because they have all grown very fond of her and it is quite possible she might really be her granddaughter. | |
| Starring: | Jodie Foster (as Casey Brown), Helen Hayes (as Lady St Edmund), David Niven (as Priory the butler, [and other roles in disguises]), Leo McKern (as Harry Bundage, conman) |
| Featuring: | Vivian Pickles (as Clara Grimsworthy, Harry's cousin), Veronica Quilligan, Ian Sharrock, Sarah Tamakuni and David Samuels (as Orphan children) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the novel Christmas at Candleshoe by Michael Innes |
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David Niven plays four roles - it is in the main role of Priory the butler that he looks like "himself" and for the other three lesser roles he adopts heavy disguises. |
| The Canterbury Tales (1972) | Previous Next |
| Writer/Director: Pier Paolo Pasolini / Producer: Alberto Grimaldi | |
| Type: Period Drama | Running Time: 111 mins / 106 mins |
| In the late 1300s a poet suggests to a group of pilgrims travelling to Canterbury that they pass the time on the long journey by each telling a story. The eight tales that follow are the stories they tell. (one of the pilgrims called Geoffrey Chaucer writes down the tales for use in a book)
Brief overviews of the stories presented:- 1) An ageing squire called Sir January wishes to prove himself by wedding and bedding a fair young maiden. He chooses a beautiful young woman called May from the village and she has no choice but to comply with his wishes. But May pines for a young lover called Damian. When Sir January goes blind she is able to carry on under his very nose and when his sight returns and he catches them canoodling she manages to convince him it was his eyes playing tricks. The twist of fortunes in this story are controlled by a couple of gods each supplying the story developments for their chosen character. 2) A corrupt rent collector takes bribes for overlooking sins of the flesh - Those that cannot pay are denounced and burnt to death on a griddle. Riding to another town the collector is approached by a man who says he is the Devil and that they are much alike with the two of them both cheating without scruples. They ride together in companionship until the Devil tricks the rent collector into denouncing him and he is taken to hell to learn from his evil ways. 3) An inveterately happy young reveller called Perkin gets the sack for indolence. His charming zaniness makes him delightfully entertaining to women but annoys men and even when he is tried and put in the public stocks his happy spirits cannot be dampened as he sings to the crowd. 4) A student scholar called Nicholas beds a young married woman called Alison by outwitting her jealous carpenter husband by feigning religious purity. But Nicholas is not Alison's only admirer and while she and Nicholas are laying together she is serenaded outside her window by Absalon and she decides to play a demeaning practical joke upon him by farting in his face while he has his eyes closed anticipating a placating kiss from her window. Later when Absalon returns seemingly still naively after a kiss, Nicholas decides to take her place and repeat the same joke again on this obvious fool - but Absalon is being deceitful himself this time and Nicholas gets a red-hot poker in his bottom intended for her. 5) The Wife from Bath is a serial marrier whose voracious sexual appetite has worn out a string of husbands. Her latest fancy is a studious scholar called Jenkins who by means of an unsolicited sexual favour falls easy prey to her manipulative clutches and is soon wed to her. But he does not live up to her expectations and soon starts sermonising on her moral conduct. (There's no particularly satisfactory conclusion to this tale it just ends with them arguing). 6) Two students Alan and John visit a miller with some corn to grind in his mill to make flour and return with freshly baked bread. The miller is dishonest and intends to supply them with bread made from bran instead. They stay the night and bed his young daughter Molly who is grateful and tells them where their real bread is as they escape from the miller angered by them being free and easy with his daughter. 7) Dick, Jack and Johnny are three friends mourning their young friend Rufus and want to find and take revenge on Death. They threaten a wise man into revealing where death is and he directs them to an oak tree under which they find a treasure hoard of gold coins. They are elated to be rich and plan to remove the coins under cover of darkness. Dick is sent to the village to get some wine and he decides to poison it and kill his two friends so he can have the coins for himself. But the other two are making their own deadly plans against Dick so they don't have to share with him. Dick returns and the other two drink their wine and then catch Dick unawares and stab him dead - then they both keel over dead themselves from the poison. And as the wise man predicted, they did indeed find death underneath the oak tree. 8) A greedy friar who preys on dying men to appropriate their valuables, which he tells them will smooth their path to heaven, is visited one night by an angel who takes him on a tour of Hell and the friar sees the resounding contempt for friars sent to hell who are squeezed like diarrhoea from the devil's backpassage. | |
| Featuring: | (Prologue) Pier Paolo Pasolini (as Geoffrey Chaucer) (Story 1) Hugh Griffith (as Sir January), Josephine Chaplin (as May, [nudity probably a body double]) (Story 2) Franco Citti (as The Devil), O.T. (as Rent Collector) (Story 3) Ninetto Davoli (as Perkin) (Story 4) Dan Thomas (as Nicholas), Jenny Runacre (as Alison), Michael Balfour (as John the carpenter, Alison's husband), Peter Cain (as Absalon) (Story 5) Laura Betti (as The Wife from Bath), Tom Baker (as Jenkins), Judy Stewart-Murray (as Alice, Jenkins' landlady) (Story 6) Patrick Duffett (as Alan), Eamann Howell (as John), Albert King (as Simkin, The Miller), Eileen King (as Miller's wife), Heather Johnson (as Molly, Miller's daughter) (Story 7) Martin Whelar (as Jack), John McLaren (as Johnny), Edward Monteith (as Dick), Robin Askwith (as Rufus, [spelt as Asquith on credits]), Alan Webb (as Wise Man) (Story 8) John Francis Lane (as Friar), Settimo Castagna (as Angel) |
| Familiar Faces: | Nicholas Smith (as Friar, [Mr Rumbold from Are You Being Served], cameo in prologue scene) |
| Starlets: | Elisabetta Genovese (as Prosperina, Story 1), Diana Fisher (as The Bride, story 3) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on The Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer |
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The tale segues are not always very clear and occasionally it is not at first obvious when a tale has finished and a new one has begun - other times they are delimited by a short piece with Chaucer working in his study. There are no titles given for the separate stories. It is an Italian production entitled I Racconti di Canterbury filmed in English with the British actors supplying their own voices and the Italian actors being dubbed. Two versions have been seen - one with the original English soundtrack and another that is entirely dubbed into Italian and then had English subtitles added to translate it back. In some ways the subtitled one is easier to follow since the sometimes badly acted dubbed English voices are no longer an issue when it is all in Italian and everything has to be read - it's also easier to pick up on plot points (names, etc) overlooked or improperly heard when following just the speech. The English version lasted 111 minutes and the Italian dubbed and subtitled version lasted 106 minutes - although nothing obvious seemed to have been cut so possibly the films were run at marginally different speeds. |
| Captain Clegg (1962) | Previous Next |
| aka: Night Creatures | |
| Writer: John Elder / Director: Peter Graham Scott / Producer: John Temple-Smith | |
| Type: Adventure | Running Time: 82 mins |
| Prologue: Starting in 1776 on the high seas aboard the pirate vessel of notorious buccaneer Captain Nathaniel Clegg. A crewman known as the Mulatto is accused of assaulting the captain's pregnant wife and attempting to murder the captain. As punishment Captain Clegg orders the Mulatto's tongue cut out and then abandons him on a barren island to die of thirst and starvation. Clegg's wife later dies in childbirth leaving Clegg with a baby. That same year Clegg was offered a pardon by the king for capturing a Spanish slave trader. But the navy were so unwilling to forgive him for outwitting them for over ten years that they had him arrested for tax evasion instead and that same year he was hanged at Rye. End of prologue.
Sixteen years later in 1792 Captain Clegg's grave is in the grounds of the local church in Dymchurch. The local parson Reverend Dr Blyss was prison chaplain at the time of Clegg's execution and interceded to give the condemned man a proper Christian burial. Dr Blyss is a popular parson who has transformed the fortunes of the village which was previously very poor. Everyone's standard of living has improved thanks to the generosity of their much-loved reverend. Unbeknown to most however, Blyss has managed to achieve this benevolence with the profits of an illegal smuggling operation. He and a few select parishioners are engaged in the production and supply of contraband alcohol. There is a local legend of supernatural beings known as Marsh Phantoms who ride at night across the nearby marshes glowing with ghostly eeriness and keeping superstitious folk safely in their homes after dark. This legend has enabled Blyss and his men to operate freely at night for many years. Their activities are thrown into disarray when a unit of naval men from the Revenue Office arrive investigating possible smuggling activities reported to them by a local informant who has now died. The detachment is led by the famous Captain Collier who for many years tried to capture the notorious Captain Clegg without success. One of his party is an unstable mute Mulatto whom they keep imprisoned in chains - the very same man condemned by Clegg sixteen years ago whom Collier picked up soon after his abandonment while trailing Clegg's ship. The Mulatto has an angry reaction when he sees Dr Blyss but cannot speak to explain his odd behaviour. Blyss, in conjunction with the undertaker Mr Mipps and the innkeeper Mr Rash, runs a very slick operation. They are confident Collier will not uncover their secret because of their network of secret underground passageways connecting the various residences. Mr Rash is ward to a girl approaching womanhood called Imogene whom Dr Blyss brought to him as an orphan babe. Imogene is being courted by the local squire's son Harry Cobtree who cares not that she is a mere innkeeper's daughter and wants them to be married. Dr Blyss is anxious about Collier's investigation because he and his smuggling cohorts have urgent orders to fulfil which they cannot deliver whilst Collier is around. Captain Collier is suspicious but can find no proof of any wrongdoing. He is sceptical of the Marsh Phantoms story so when a frightened man rushes in and says he has just spotted them Collier demands the man lead he and his men to the location. This however was a ruse and while Collier is out hunting ghosts Dr Blyss and his men make their deliveries. After hours of fruitless marching Collier realises he has been duped and demands the stooge lead him to the smugglers' rendezvous point. They fail to capture anyone but a shot is fired and one of the collaborators is wounded in an arm before getting away. The wounded man is Harry who is one of Blyss' inner circle. Meanwhile the Mulatto has freed himself and dug up the grave of Captain Clegg only to find it empty. He then attacks Dr Blyss' home in an uncontrollable rage. He is repelled but in the damage done in Blyss' study, the innkeeper Mr Rash finds a document indicating that his ward Imogene was no ordinary babe but was the daughter of the pirate Captain Clegg! Rash is a weak man and has licentious fancies towards his own ward and thinks he can use this information to bend her to his will. Imogene is mortified to learn who she is and rushes to Dr Blyss to confirm the story. Blyss tells her it is true but then explains that her father was not as bad as he is often portrayed and was actually a brave and courageous man at times. Collier discovers that Harry has an injured arm and arrests him for being a smuggler. Harry is marched across the marshes at night by the soldiers to be held in their ship awaiting trial. But then the soldiers are confronted by the horrifying Marsh Phantoms who rescue Harry and ride off. The Phantoms turn out to be Dr Blyss and his men wearing luminescent clothing painted to glow like skeletons. Captain Collier finally realises why the Mulatto was so enraged by the sight of Dr Blyss. It is because Blyss is in fact Captain Clegg himself - the same man who mutilated and condemned Mulatto. He and his men head for the church to arrest him. At the church Dr Blyss quickly marries his daughter Imogene to her sweetheart Harry and urges them to flee and start a new life together. After the couple have escaped through a secret tunnel Collier arrives and Blyss is captured. He reveals to an astonished congregation that he is indeed Captain Clegg. He had had many friends at Rye and he had been rescued from the gallows in a secret plot. He then came here with his baby Imogene whom he left in the care of Mr Rash and then assumed the role of a parson. His imminent death at the gallows had changed him and he had vowed to make amends for his former crimes and work for the good of less fortunate people. He has not profited from revenue evasion and every penny made has been used to feed and clothe the poor of this village. The parishioners support Dr Blyss and turn against the soldiers and he is able to escape down a secret passage. He emerges in the undertaker's workroom where he is killed by a spear thrown by the still lurking Mulatto. Dr Blyss aka Captain Clegg is given a tearful funeral of a much-loved man and then buried in his own previously empty grave. | |
| Comment: Captain Clegg is unseen in the prologue so the viewer doesn't know for some time that Dr Blyss is Clegg. | |
| Starring: | Peter Cushing (as Rev Dr Blyss), Patrick Allen (as Captain Howard Collier, revenue officer), Michael Ripper (as Jeremiah Mipps, coffin maker), Martin Benson (as Mr Rash, innkeeper), Yvonne Romain (as Imogene, Mr Rash's ward), Oliver Reed (as Harry Cobtree, beau of Imogene) |
| Featuring: | David Lodge (as Navy bosun, Captain Collier's subordinate), Derek Francis (as Squire Anthony Cobtree, Harry's father), Daphne Anderson (as Mrs Rash, innkeeper's wife), Milton Reid (as The Mulatto, condemned by Captain Clegg), Jack MacGowran (as Local Man, decoying Collier's men), Sydney Bromley (as Old Tom Ketch, Collier's informant) |
| NOTES: | |
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Additional dialogue by Barbara S. Harper |
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The version reviewed carried the American title of Night Creatures. |
| Writer/Director/Producer: Brian Clemens / Co-Producer: Albert Fennell | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 91 mins |
| In the 17th century the handsome adventurer Captain Kronos and his trusty friend Professor Hieronymos Grost are professional Vampire Hunters. The pair are travelling to the town of Durward at the request of an old friend Dr Marcus who believes there are vampires in the area. On the way they meet up with a beautiful gypsy girl called Carla who they let travel with them into town.
Dr Marcus meets with them and explains that there have been several incidents of young girls being attacked in the area and becoming incredibly old afterwards. Their attacker is a shadowy figure in a black cloak and hood and wields a mesmeric power over his victims before attacking them. Kronos knows that there are many breeds of vampire and this type evidently feeds on its victim's youth and vitality instead of their blood - literally sucking their youth away. Each type of vampire has different vulnerabilities and the method by which this one can be killed is not yet known. Living nearby in their large mansion are the Durward family. Close siblings Paul and Sara look after their elderly mother Lady Durward who still mourns the death of her husband Lord Hagen Durward seven years beforehand. Lord Hagen had been the greatest swordsman of his time as his tombstone proudly professes. Paul and Sara have an unworldly air about them - Sara fears becoming old - but Paul assures her that the Durwards are especially renowned for their youthfulness and she need not worry on that score - unlike their mother who is a Durward only by marriage. Whilst out investigating the attacks with Kronos and Grost, Dr Marcus is attacked by the shadowy figure - but instead of dying he is made into a vampire himself. When Marcus realises what has been done to him he begs his friend Kronos to destroy him. Kronos is naturally devastated at what must be done but seizes the opportunity to discover just what it is that can kill this breed. They try killing Marcus by various means using stakes, hanging and fire to no avail and eventually discover that steel is this vampire breed's Achilles heel. Grost forges a steel sword for Kronos to use to kill the predatory vampire when they discover its identity. They strongly suspect the siblings Paul and Sara of being involved and Carla the gypsy girl agrees to act as a bait. She enters their mansion pleading sanctuary from a violent husband and receives their hospitality to stay the night. During the night she is visited and mesmerised by ... Lady Durward ... no longer old and feeble. Her elderly appearance had been a disguise to hide her renewed youthful vigour. She is of the Karnstein family by birth and is blessed with certain dark secrets. She has used her abilities to raise her dead husband from his grave and is feeding on the local youths to renew his strength and energy - now that is almost complete as she invites him to feed on Carla. But Kronos is waiting in hiding and intervenes and he and the undead master swordsman Lord Hagen have an epic sword fight. Kronos eventually overcomes the vampire and destroys him with the steel blade followed swiftly by the Lady Durward. The siblings were innocents in the affair and had no idea of their mother's activities. Captain Kronos and Professor Grost then leave town ready for their next adventure. | |
| Starring: | Horst Janson (as Captain Kronos), John Cater (as Professor Hieronymos Grost), Caroline Munro (as Carla), John Carson (Dr. Marcus), Shane Briant (as Paul Durward), Lois Daine (Sara Durward) |
| Featuring: | Wanda Ventham (Lady Durward), Ian Hendry (as Kerro, local ruffian), Paul Greenwood (as Giles, local lad) |
| Starlets: | Lisa Collings, Susanna East, Elizabeth Dear, Joanna Ross, Olga Anthony, Gigi Gurpinar, Jacqui Cook, Penny Price, Linda Cunningham, Caroline Villiers |
| NOTES: | |
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This tale features a villainess that is from the same family line that featured in the Hammer trilogy of vampire tales about the Karnstein family The Vampire Lovers (1970), Lust For a Vampire (1971) and Twins of Evil (1971). |
| Writers: Pip & Jane Baker, R. Wright Campbell / Director: James Hill / Producer: Bertram Ostrer | |
| Type: Adventure | Running Time: 101 mins |
| Set in the 1860s. During a violent storm a passenger ship travelling from America to England gets into difficulties 200 miles from the English coast and sinks. Six of the passengers fail to reach the lifeboat and they are swept underwater to almost certain deaths. But they are miraculously rescued by some men swimming underwater using breathing devices and taken back to an amazing vessel that is able to operate underwater.
The survivors include American senator Robert Fraser who was on an important diplomatic assignment to England for discussions concerning the civil war raging in his homeland. The others are English:- Helen Beckett and her young son Phillip; brothers Barnaby and Swallow Bath; and a man called Lomax. The vessel they are on is far more advanced than anything any of them have ever encountered before. They are treated with great courtesy by the submarine's first officer Joab who then introduces them to the commander. His name is Captain Nemo and his fantastic underwater ship is named the Nautilus. Nemo tells them it was very fortuitous they were passing on their way home and is pleased to have been able to save their lives. Home is a large underwater city enclosed in a transparent watertight dome. The city is named Templemere and is the brainchild of Captain Nemo who, having grown weary of humankind's continual efforts to destroy itself in wars, decided to build a new realm according to his idealistic vision. He managed to keep the whole construction secret from the outside world and it is now populated by the workers that helped him build it and their families. The city is completely self-sustained with food industriously farmed from the sea around them. They have a machine that extracts drinking water and oxygen from the seawater and as a waste product produces gold. The gold is valueless here because it is so plentiful and is used as a useful building material because it does not corrode. The Bath brothers are both avaricious men and realise how rich they could be if they can return to the surface with just a fraction of this incredible wealth. Senator Fraser also is eager to return in order to complete his vital diplomatic mission. However Nemo reveals that he cannot allow them to leave because the existence of Templemere must remain secret. He allows them to join the society and benefit from all the luxuries of the Utopian lifestyle his people enjoy. Young Phillip joins the swimming class which is taught by Mala who is Joab's girlfriend. However she is quite taken by Senator Fraser and a romance develops. Joab becomes jealous of this but has to remain stoic. Mr Lomax is a claustrophobic and he becomes crazed at the thought of living under a dome for the rest of his life. He makes a reckless bid for freedom by trying to destroy the dome with no regard for the safety of the others and accidentally kills himself in the attempt. Senator Fraser appears to accept that escape is impossible and begins to integrate himself into the way of life. He learns to pilot the Nautilus and his skills and ability to think on his feet so impress Nemo that he makes him his number one aide. Joab is again aggrieved by this because until then that had been his role. The Bath brothers learn that there is a secret second submarine called Nautilus II that is still undergoing sea trials. They tell the senator who, given this unexpected opportunity, feels duty bound to make an attempt to escape and complete his mission. However he needs help to get aboard and learn the controls. Help comes from an unexpected source when Joab learns of his intentions. Rather than arrest him Joab is willing to aid his escape in order to reclaim his position as Nemo's number one officer and also perhaps regain the affections of Mala. Helena and Phillip have taken to life in Templemere and decide to remain. Fraser and the gold-laden Bath brothers launch the Nautilus II and head out into open water. When Nemo finds out what has happened he launches the Nautilusto give chase. Nautilus II is more powerful but what only Nemo knows is that a flaw in the engines means it could blow up if run too hard and so he wants to stop them to save them. The Nautilus II's engines overheat and undergo cataclysmic failure and the vessel begins to break up. Fraser and the Bath brothers have no choice but to don diving suits and leave the ship which then blows up. Nemo sees the other ship explode but doesn't realise the men escaped and he returns to Templemere knowing at least that his secret will remain safe. Barnaby Bath is too heavily laden with gold and dies but Swallow Bath and Senator Fraser make it to the surface and are picked up by a passing ship. They vow never to reveal the existence of Templemere. | |
| Starring: | Robert Ryan (as Captain Nemo), Chuck Connors (as Senator Robert Fraser), Nanette Newman (as Helena Beckett), John Turner (as First Officer Joab), Bill Fraser and Kenneth Connor (as Barnaby and Swallow Bath, brothers), Luciana Paluzzi (as Mala, head of swimming school), Allan Cuthbertson (as Lomax), Christopher Hartstone (as Phillip Beckett, Helena's son) |
| NOTES: | |
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This is an original story based on the character created by Jules Verne |
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Another film reviewed on these pages that features Captain Nemo is Mysterious Island (1961) although the films are not connected. |
| Writer/Director: Paul Mayersberg / Producer: Don Boyd | |
| Type: Thriller | Running Time: 97 mins |
| Rowena Le Vay is the daughter of a rich tycoon called Gregory Le Vay. She is in her early twenties and still lives with him in their plush mansion somewhere outside London. Gregory pampers and cossets her to such an extent that she has never felt able to break free and live a life of her own. Being an heiress to a vast fortune has made her name well known and the newspapers often speculate that her father keeps her incarcerated. That is not the case and she is given as much freedom as she wants but she was conditioned from an early age to be dependant on him and somehow she has never summoned up the impetus to become independent. Her lack of fibre makes her cry when she is alone.
Unbeknown to her she is being carefully monitored by a group of three individuals who are planning an event that will alter Rowena's life forevermore. They have empathy with Rowena's situation after reading about her and have decided she needs their help but to do that they need to kidnap her and break down her resistance to change. The three are about the same age as Rowena and have a nihilist's view of the world. They have rejected their own privileged backgrounds along with society's laws and have chosen to live as they want to live. D is their leader and his two co-conspirators are his girlfriend Bryony, and their Japanese friend Hiro. They successfully abduct Rowena when her father is away from the house and take her blindfolded to an abandoned warehouse where they keep her shut in a large packing crate for days. Rowena has no idea what is happening and thinks she is in the hands of a dangerous gang of hardened criminals wanting a ransom. In order to maintain that impression the gang issue ransom demands and force her to record appeals to her father to pay up or she will suffer. All through this period they keep her deprived of sensory awareness and pay no respect to her human dignity. After weeks of confinement Bryony and Hiro begin to show her some compassion and tell her about themselves. They make her see that her father does not love her and he keeps her in a figurative box much like the one they keep her in all day. She comes to understand what a manipulative and controlling man her father is and how he ruined her late mother's promising singing career by breaking her spirit and after her death he started doing the same to Rowena. They make her believe she can control her own destiny and reject the way of life she had as being immaterial and irrelevant. After weeks of wearing a blindfold Rowena is at last permitted to remove it and see their faces. During her time as their prisoner Rowena has found herself growing close to them and has begun to think of them as friends who have helped her to understand the truth about herself. She realises she cannot possibly go back to her old life now and wants to rebel and become an anarchist like them and treat society with the disrespect it deserves. She also realises that Hiro wants her to become his girlfriend and has a kind and considerate nature with which he expresses his quiet love for her. Now a gang of four Rowena accompanies them on a bank raid in which they round up the customers and make them believe they are going to be mown down with a machine gun only to have them find out the rounds were blanks. The terror they inflicted gives Rowena a powerful charge. The stunt makes them wanted criminals and they go into hiding. Rowena was recognised and speculation is rife on whether the kidnapped heiress was forced to participate or was there willingly. As the police close in on them D and Bryony decide to go out in a blaze of glory and have a shoot-out with the police and then in a pact kill each other to avoid capture. Hiro manages to escape and Rowena is arrested. No one believes Rowena can be a real anarchist but she is nevertheless found guilty of wrongdoing and sentenced to two years in prison which she spends in isolation. When Rowena is released she returns home. Her father wants to help her forget the awful experience she went through. But Rowena's mindset has been irrevocably changed and she does not want to forget and is determined to become independent. Then love-struck Hiro shows up after having waited two years for her release. He expresses his abiding love for her but Rowena tells him she has no feelings for him anymore and she is no longer the same woman she was when he knew her. He and his friends helped her emerge from the mollycoddled prison of her father's making and she is grateful but now she must move on. Hiro takes the rejection of his love badly and with nothing left to live for he kills himself. Rowena feels nothing but just opens the window to let in the light as she prepares to start her life properly. | |
| Starring: | Irina Brook (as Rowena Le Vay), Oliver Reed (as Gregory Le Vay, Rowena's father) (Abductors) Xavier Deluc (as D, leader), Corinne Dacla (as Bryony), Hiro Arai (as Hiro) |
| Featuring: | Nick Reding (as Leo, Rowena's boyfriend), Annie Leon (as Psychic), Michael Cronin (as McPherson, chief superintendent), Marissa Dunlop (as Young Rowena) |
| Caravan to Vaccarès (1974) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Paul Wheeler / Director: Geoffrey Reeve / Producers: Geoffrey Reeve, Richard Morris-Adams | |
| Type: Thriller | Running Time: approx 89 mins |
| Set in the present day. Bowman is an ex-army American who is in France on a sabbatical. In exchange for a good pay-cheque and ticket back home he has agreed to take on some clandestine work for an enigmatic European called Duc de Croyter. The job sounds straightforward enough - he is to collect a certain man being smuggled into the country, keep him safe for a few days and then escort him to the States. De Croyter is secretive about the man's identity but tells Bowman that the individual is being brought into France by some caravanning gypsies who are gathering for a huge Romany festival in Vaccarès on the nearby estate of one of de Croyter's friends Henri Czerda.
Bowman is travelling with a British woman called Lila whom he picked up hitchhiking her way to Vaccarès. She is a freelance photographer who is hoping to get some good pictures of the event. At the festival Bowman meets up with his charge who turns out to be an Hungarian scientist called Zuger. The scientist has developed a formula that will greatly increase the efficiency of solar energy converters enabling the production of cheap energy. Zuger wants to share it freely with the world hence his need to get to the USA. But there are others who want to possess that knowledge for themselves and exploit it which soon becomes clear when a hired mercenary called Ferenc makes several attempts to capture him. Only Bowman's skills prevent that happening. Ferenc tries different tactics and kidnaps Lila and then demands an exchange. Bowman pretends to go along with it armed with a plan to free Lila without giving up Zuger. However Zuger panics fearing Bowman is double-crossing him and the scientist ends up being caught by Ferenc with Lila still captive. Bowman has to mount a one-man rescue operation in which he successfully frees both of them. The day of departure arrives and Bowman and Zuger head for the airport but their car comes under attack from a helicopter as Ferenc makes another attempt to get the scientist. Eventually Bowman stops the car and Ferenc sees Zuger make a run for it. The mercenary chases and captures the scientist discovering too late that he has been tricked and it is Bowman dressed in Zuger's clothing - they fight and Bowman manages to kill Ferenc. Only then does Bowman discover the moneyman behind the abduction attempts was De Croyter's supposed friend Henri Czerda and Bowman has to survive more peril before the plot is finally resolved with the death of Czerda. Bowman is at last able to complete the final part of his assignment and escort Zuger to the States accompanied by Lila who decides to go with him after becoming close during the preceding events. | |
| Starring: | David Birney (as Bowman), Charlotte Rampling (as Lila), Michel Lonsdale (as Duc de Croyter), Michael Bryant (as Zuger, scientist) |
| Featuring: | Marcel Bozzuffi (as Henri Czerda, French ranch owner), Marianne Eggerickx (as Cecile, Croyter's daughter), Françoise Brion (as Stella, gypsy woman), Serge Marquand (as Ferenc, killer) |
| NOTES: | |
• |
Based on the novel by Alistair MacLean; adapted by Joseph Forest |
• |
The version reviewed was an edited television daytime broadcast lasting 89 mins with the nudity removed and perhaps some violence - hence the approximation of running time. The scene that includes Charlotte Rampling's nudity has been viewed separately from a different source and would add less than a minute to the running time - it is not known how much may or may not have been excised for violence. |
| Carousella (1966) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Richard Wortley / Director: John Irvin / Producers: Maurice Hatton, Malcolm Haslam | |
| Type: Documentary | Running Time: 25 mins |
| A documentary offering a slice-of life view of three young women who work as strippers in London.
Tina Samuels is 21 and began stripping a year ago initially for a dare. She married young but is now separated and she enjoys all the normal things any girl her age would. She likes going out with wisecracking American sailors and showing them around London because she finds their outgoing and carefree manner appealing. Tina takes more pride in her striptease work than she believes an ordinary office girl would in their job. She never thinks that what she is doing is sordid nor does she worry about what the men who watch her dance may be thinking. Tina holds the view that any girl with enough courage could do what she is doing and it would soon become a routine job just like any other. Julie Lester is 24 and is married with two young children and has been stripping for 18 months. She has always enjoyed dancing ever since she was a little girl and has continued to employ those talents to earn a living. Her two children do not know what she does and to them she is just an ordinary mother. Stripping is just a job to her which is not very difficult and pays better than almost anything else she could do. Katy Jordan is 26 and has been a stripper for six months. She likes being able to pay for luxuries and has aspirations to go travelling one day. She is going out with a young Italian called Romano who works as a croupier at a casino. He has a fiery character with many disparate moods, but Katy finds his unpredictability to be exciting. Currently they are planning for a holiday to Italy so Romano can show her his country. All the girls appear to very positive about their chosen line of work and none of them feel they are being exploited or badly treated. At the end of each girls' account we see them perform a specially staged strip routine in which they finish up topless. | |
| Starring: | Tina Samuels, Julie Lester, Katy Jordan (The three featured strippers) |
| Featuring: | Bill Dane (Choreographer and Costume Designer), Romano Rossi (Katy's boyfriend), Hal Galili and Chuck Julian (American sailors with Tina) |
| NOTES: | |
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Made in Black and White |
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As far as can be ascertained the girls featured are real strippers who are credited in the opening titles using their full names along with the other participants who are all playing themselves. |
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Also making a very brief but credited appearance are the rock group "The Who!" (credited with an exclamation), seen performing a small portion of a song. |
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A narrator is heard who is indicated elsewhere as being Valentine Dyall but his name does not appear on the film's credits |
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The film is so named because the girls work at the Carousel Theatre Club |
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This short film can be found as an extra on the BFI DVD release of Primitive London (1965). |
| Carry on Abroad (1972) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 85 mins |
| Publican Vic Flange is planning a long weekend away by himself on a package tour to the Spanish resort of Elsbels. His wife Cora was intending to stay behind and look after their pub because she hates travelling. But when she discovers that local beauty Sadie Tomkins is also going on the same trip she becomes suspicious that Vic is carrying on with her and decides to go along too.
The trip has been organised by Wundatours run by Stuart Farquhar who acts as head courier. Vic and Cora board the coach and are joined by Sadie and the various other holidaymakers heading for the same destination:- Stanley Blunt and his prudish and stuffy wife Evelyn; mummy's boy Eustace Tuttle on his first trip alone; jack-the-lad Bert Conway on the lookout for some female company; Gay Robin who has come with his straight friend Nicholas but gets jealous whenever Nicholas looks at any women; two young women called Lily and Marge who are hoping to meet some nice men, but are dismayed to find the only young men are a group of monks including mild-mannered Brother Bernard. They arrive at the Palace Hotel in Elsbels to find it only half-completed and still under construction. The hotel manager Pepe welcomes them and they are shown to rooms on the first floor that have been just about completed. The guests are not happy with the shambolic conditions and Pepe is soon beleaguered by complaints. Vic tries to conduct his affair with Sadie, but Cora is always keeping a watchful eye on him and what's more womaniser Bert starts making a move on Sadie too. Brother Bernard realises he likes girls still when he meets Lily and Marge and decides to quit his order. Stanley becomes increasingly frustrated by his wife's po-faced attitude to everything and starts becoming friendly with Cora who welcomes his attention. On the final full day it starts to rain and so the holidaymakers go on a coach trip and visit a market where several of them buy a strong liquor. When they get back to the hotel it is still raining and Pepe organises a farewell party. Spirits are low until several of them independently decide to lace the punch with the liquor they bought creating a potent mix. Everyone gets hopelessly merry and friendly with each other. Meanwhile the rain has become torrential and flash flooding has started to weaken the hotel's foundations causing subsidence. The hotel's structure is crumbling but the merrymakers don't notice the disaster occurring around them and continue enjoying themselves and mending worn out relationships. Many retire upstairs to their rooms to continue their rekindled passions until the hotel superstructure starts collapsing around them and the hotel has to be abandoned. Back at home Vic and Cora's rocky marriage has been repaired by their holiday experiences and they celebrate by organising a reunion of their holidaymaker friends in their pub. | |
| Starring: | Sidney James (as Vic Flange), Joan Sims (as Cora Flange), Kenneth Williams (as Stuart Farquhar, Wundatours courier), Barbara Windsor (as Sadie Tomkins), Charles Hawtrey (Eustace Tuttle), Kenneth Connor and June Whitfield (as Stanley and Evelyn Blunt), Bernard Bresslaw (as Brother Bernard), Peter Butterworth (as Pepe, hotel manager), Hattie Jacques (as Floella, cook, Pepe's wife), Sally Geeson (as Lily), Carol Hawkins (as Marge), Jimmy Logan (as Bert Conway), Gail Grainger (as Moira Plunkett, assistant courier) |
| Featuring: | Derek Francis (as Brother Martin, monk leader), John Clive (Robin, gay), David Kernan (as Nicholas, straight), Ray Brooks (as Georgio, hotel barman, Pepe's son), Jack Douglas (as Harry, man in pub), Patsy Rowlands (as Miss Dobbs, travel agency receptionist), Alan Curtis (as Spanish Police Chief) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 24th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Matron (1972) and the next one was Carry On Girls (1973) |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 85 mins |
| Doctor Jimmy Nookey is a popular outpatients doctor at Long Hampton Hospital who has a reputation for tomfoolery. But fortunately the head surgeon Frederick Carver is a supporter of Dr Nookey and manages to forestall any disciplinary matters. However Dr Nookey has a rival in Doctor Ernest Stoppidge who is jealous of his colleague's popularity and wants to see him dismissed as a disruptive influence.
Carver has an ambition to set up his own private clinic but he needs an investor to fund the initial outlay. He approaches a rich and grateful former patient of his called Ellen Moore with his proposal. But she wants a favour in return - her late husband died on a remote tropical island and she has set up a medical mission there in his honour - but the resident doctor has ended his tour of duty and she needs to find a replacement. Mr Carver realises that is a tall order because no one on his staff in their right mind would volunteer for such a thankless duty in such a forsaken region. But then Dr Nookey falls victim to a malicious prank by Dr Stoppidge who laces his punch with highly intoxicating 100% proof surgical alcohol. The mayhem that results at Dr Nookey's hands puts him up before the disciplinary board. Mr Carver manages to save Dr Nookey from dismissal but only if he is sent far away. And so Dr Nookey has no choice but to accept the missionary posting to the remote tropical Beatific Islands. The island belies its name and is in fact a dreadful place with awful weather all year round. The local natives never use the medical facility because they don't trust white man's medicine and prefer their own witch doctor. So Nookey has nothing to do all day expect mope around getting drunk and feeling sorry for himself. The only person enjoying himself is the medical orderly Gladstone Screwer who has himself a cosy setup with a harem of wives and money aplenty to spend on booze because no medical supplies are needed. Gladstone tries to cheer Nookey up with an offer of a local beauty to keep him company. But Nookey doesn't fancy any of them because the local ideal of beauty is to be fat. So Gladstone mixes up a potion he has learned from the local witch doctor and within a week he has slimmed one of the girls down into a model of western beauty. Nookey is amazed at the miracle slimming drug and knows he could make a fortune with it back in England. So he takes a supply and returns home. Nookey goes into partnership with Ellen Moore and they set up a private slimming establishment called the Moore-Nookey clinic. It is an instant success and rich women are eager to get onto the waiting list for the wonder treatment. Mr Carver is vexed because Ellen Moore has used her money to help Dr Nookey instead of him. He becomes determined to expose Dr Nookey as a charlatan and so he persuades Dr Stoppidge to disguise himself as a woman and book in for the treatment and get a sample of the drug for analysis. Meanwhile the randy Gladstone Screwer reads about Dr Nookey's success and comes to England wanting a cut of the profits. Nookey sees through Dr Stoppidge's disguise and has some fun at his expense by setting him up with Gladstone. Eventually Mr Carver threatens to take Nookey to the medical council for using an unapproved product and Gladstone threatens to cease supplying the secret potion. So to appease them both they are let in as partners. | |
| Comment: There is a subplot involving Dr Nookey falling in love with a pin-up starlet called Goldie Locks and at the end they get married. | |
| Starring: | Jim Dale (as Doctor Jimmy Nookey), Kenneth Williams (as Frederick Carver, head surgeon), Sidney James (as Gladstone Screwer, mission orderly), Joan Sims (as Ellen Moore, rich widow), Barbara Windsor (as Goldie Locks, glamorous film star), Charles Hawtrey (as Doctor Ernest Stoppidge, senior house surgeon), Hattie Jacques (as Matron) |
| Featuring: | Patsy Rowlands (as Miss Fosdick, Mr Carver's secretary), William Mervyn (as Lord Paragon, chairman of board of governors), Patricia Hayes (as Mrs Beasley, out patient), Pat Coombs (as New Matron), Elizabeth Knight (as Nurse Willing), Peter Butterworth (as Patient, [cameo appearance only]) |
| Familiar Faces: | Wilfrid Brambell (as Randy patient, [uncredited cameo]) |
| Starlets: | Valerie Leon (as Deirdre, Dr Nookey's secretary), Valerie Van Ost (as Out-Patients Sister), Shakira Caine (as Scrubba, slimmed down native girl) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 18th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Camping (1969) and the next one was Carry On Up The Jungle (1970) |
• |
This is not a story sequel to Carry on Doctor (1967) because although it inevitably has many of the same actors involved, they are all playing different characters. |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 85 mins |
| WC Boggs & Son is a company that manufactures ceramic toiletware which has been established since 1870. The current company director WC Boggs wishes to maintain the high standards of his family company and is particularly averse to the idea of introducing a line of bidets which Mr Boggs thinks are a contemptible item even though his son Lewis tries to persuade him they are all the rage these days. Works foreman Sid Plummer doesn't even know what a bidet is for until it is explained to him.
On the factory floor where the workers assemble the lavatorial items, the union shop steward Vic Spanner is very militant and is continually calling the workers out on strike for the slightest of infringements he detects in the management's treatment of the workers. Today he has called them all out because Lewis has decided to reduce the number of tea breaks to increase efficiency. Although most of the workers don't really want to strike they have no choice but to follow the direction of their appointed representative. In fact Vic had an ulterior motive and he was looking for a reason to call a strike so he could go to the football match that afternoon. At home, Sid Plummer's wife fawns over her pet budgie which has remained silent for a year despite her constant coaxing of it to give a chirp. Then Sid discovers that when he reads out a list of horseracing runners from his betting paper, the budgie chirps at the name of the winner. Sid lays some bets and starts winning a lot of money. Work resumes at the factory when the tea breaks are reinstated and Vic is pleased with his little victory. He fancies the tea trolley girl Myrtle Plummer who is Sid's daughter although Lewis also fancies her and she can't decide whom to choose. Lewis brokers a big deal with an Arab sheik to produce 1000 bidets which must be completed in time for a big occasion or payment will be withheld. Mr Boggs overcomes his distaste and agrees to go ahead although the deadline is tight. The bank refuses a bridging loan to cover immediate expenses so Sid puts up the cash out of his winnings and work begins. But then Vic brings the workers out on strike again when the unconventional bidet design forces designated plumbing and wastepipe fitters to do parts of each others jobs which is against union rules. This strike is a long one and the delay in production is proving disastrous. Mr Boggs starts looking for someone to buy his company out. Vic calls the strike off for one day because it is the day of the annual works outing to Brighton. Everyone goes including Mr Boggs and they all have a good time. Myrtle uses Vic to try and make Lewis jealous to see how keen he really is and later that day he proposes and they go off together to get married. Next day the strike is back on and even though news that the factory might close becomes common knowledge Vic won't budge on his entrenched position regardless of the fact they will all end up losing their jobs. Then Vic's mother hears what is going on and she bandies together all the wives to confront Vic at the picket line. Vic is scared of his ferocious mother and he caves in. The workers gratefully return to work and the wives pitch in to catch up on lost work and complete the bidet order to save the factory. Vic decides to swallow his pride and return to work where he adopts a more tolerant attitude to slight infringements to the union rules. Sid is a bit upset at first to discover his daughter has married management but then he hears he has been made a director himself in return for his investment. | |
| Starring: | Sidney James (as Sid Plummer, works foreman), Kenneth Williams (as W. C. Boggs, company director), Kenneth Cope (as Vic Spanner, shop steward), Joan Sims (as Chloe Moore, factory worker), Bernard Bresslaw (as Bernie Hulke, simple-minded factory worker), Hattie Jacques (as Beattie Plummer, Sid's wife), Jacki Piper (as Myrtle Plummer, tea trolley girl and Sid's daughter), Richard O'Callaghan (as Lewis Boggs, Bogg's eager son), Charles Hawtrey (as Charles Coote, designer), Patsy Rowlands (as Miss Withering, Mr Boggs; secretary) |
| Featuring: | Bill Maynard (as Fred Moore, Chloe's husband, commercial travelling salesman), Renee Houston (as Agatha Spanner, Vic's mother), Davy Kaye (as Benny, Sid's bookmaker), Marianne Stone (as Maud, factory worker), Geoffrey Hughes (as Willie, factory worker), Larry Martyn (as Rifle Range Owner), Julian Holloway (as Roger, Lewis' posh friend, [Uncredited]) |
| Starlets: | Margaret Nolan (as Popsy, dolly-bird factory girl on coach trip), Shirley Stelfox (as Bunny Girl Waitress), Anouska Hempel (as New Canteen Girl, [uncredited]) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 22nd Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Henry (1970) and the next one was Carry On Matron (1972) |
| Carry on Behind (1975) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Dave Freeman / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 86 mins |
| A site of a major Roman settlement is discovered in a field beside a newly opened caravan holiday site and Professor Roland Crump of the University of Kidburn's archaeological department is given the job of organising the dig using students. He is joined by a Russian specialist in Roman remains called Anna Vooshka whose imperfect English results in much risqué wordplay as she struggles to find the right words.
Meanwhile various holidaymakers are arriving at the Riverside caravan club site for a break. Fred Ramsden and Ernie Bragg are there on a supposed fishing trip away from their wives but actually they are hoping to meet a couple of nice girls. Arthur and Linda Upmore have arrived in tow with Linda's mother Daphne much to Arthur's dismay. Daphne has still not come to terms with her desertion by her husband ten years ago on the grounds he did not think he was good enough for her. When Professor Crump and Anna arrive all the main caravan areas are in use and they are obliged to share a small dilapidated caravan formerly used by the groundsman Henry Barnes. Roland is appalled at the prospect although Anna is unconcerned about matters such as false modesty. At the dig site they uncover evidence that it was the site of a Roman brothel. Site owner Major Leep is pleased with the success of his new venture and delighted and surprised to have been able to buy the land so cheaply. Various comic incidents pass the time, including a rudely spoken minor bird, and the accidental booking of a stripper for the opening night of the new clubhouse. Also Daphne rediscovers her husband Henry who has been working at the site as the groundsman. Henry has recently won the pools and now thinks he has what it takes to properly look after her and they get back together. On the final night it starts to rain heavily. It is then discovered that the field is located on the site of an old mineworks and in the deluge the ground begins to subside under the weight of the heavy caravans. Everyone has a turbulent experience and the site is abandoned. | |
| Starring: | Kenneth Williams (as Professor Roland Crump), Elke Sommer (Professor Anna Vooshka), Bernard Bresslaw (as Arthur Upmore, camper), Kenneth Connor (as Major Leep, caravan site owner), Jack Douglas (as Ernie Bragg, camper), Windsor Davies (as Fred Ramsden, camper), Joan Sims (as Daphne Barnes, Linda's mother), Peter Butterworth (as Henry Barnes, groundsman), Carol Hawkins and Sherrie Hewson (as Sandra and Carol, sexy tent campers) |
| Featuring: | Patsy Rowlands (as Linda Upmore, Arthur's wife), Ian Lavender and Adrienne Posta (as Joe and Norma Baxter, campers), Liz Fraser (as Sylvia Ramsden, Fred's wife), Patricia Franklin (as Vera Bragg, Ernie's wife) |
| Familiar Faces: | Donald Hewlett (as University Dean), David Lodge (as Pub Landlord), George Layton (as Hospital Doctor) |
| Starlets: | Jenny Cox (as Veronica, cabaret stripper, [and cine film girl]), Linda Hooks (as Hospital Nurse), Georgina Moon and Diana Darvey (as Sally and Maureen, girls at dance), Helli Louise (as Woman in shower cubicle), Alexandra Dane (as Lady in low-cut dress at town hall lecture) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 27th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Dick (1974) and the next one was Carry On England (1976) |
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It eludes me what connection the film's title has to do with its plot |
| Carry on Cleo (1964) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 88 mins |
| Starting in early Britain at a time when it is being conquered by invading Roman armies led by Emperor Julius Caesar. Brave British fighter Horsa and his timid friend Hengist Pod live in the settlement of Cockium and when it is attacked they are captured and transported to Rome to be sold as slaves. Meanwhile Caesar is finding the British climate miserable and decides to return to Rome after three years away. In his absence he has become very unpopular and plots are afoot to do away with him.
Caesar's loyal friend General Mark Anthony is sent to Egypt to meet with the Queen of the Nile Cleopatra who has been giving Rome problems. Mark Anthony's orders are to murderously deal with her, but when he sees how beautiful she is he falls madly in love and agrees to help her deal with Julius Caesar instead. That way Mark Anthony's can become emperor himself and marry Cleopatra as her equal. Horsa and Pod escape their captivity in Rome and go on the run. Horsa inadvertently foils a plot on Caesar's life when he betters several Roman centurions who were about to assassinate their ruler on some conspirators' orders. Horsa gets away and his role in the matter is not realised and instead it is the pusillanimous Pod who is given credit for the astonishing feat of bravery. Caesar makes Pod his personal bodyguard and Pod's reputation is enough to deter any further attempts on Caesar's life. Mark Anthony returns to Rome to tell Caesar that Cleopatra wants to meet with him and begin a romantic association. However this invitation is a plot cooked up between Anthony and Cleopatra to kill Caesar when he is alone in Cleopatra's bedchamber without his bodyguard present. Caesar travels to Egypt with Pod and also Horsa who is one of the galley slaves. Because of a soothsayer's prophecy and the timely intervention of Horsa, the plot is foiled and Caesar escapes back to Rome. Pod and Horsa return to Britain where Pod becomes successful with his wife due to an aphrodisiac potion he brought back and Horsa marries his sweetheart Gloria whom he also rescued from slavery. Upon return to Rome without his bodyguard, Caesar is murdered by members of the senate. Mark Anthony remains in Egypt to continue his affair with Queen Cleopatra. | |
| Starring: | Jim Dale (as Horsa), Kenneth Williams (as Julius Caesar), Sidney James (as Mark Antony), Kenneth Connor (as Hengist Pod), Amanda Barrie (as Cleopatra) |
| Featuring: | Joan Sims (as Calpurnia, Caesar's wife), Charles Hawtrey (as Seneca, Calpurnia's father), Julie Stevens (as Gloria, Horsa's sweetheart), Sheila Hancock (as Senna Pod, Hengist's wife), Jon Pertwee (as Soothsayer), Victor Maddern (as roman guard), Francis De Wolff (as Galley captain), Brian Oulton (as Brutus, Roman senator), Warren Mitchell (as Spencius, slave market trader) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 10th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Spying (1964) and the next one was Carry On Cowboy (1965) |
| Carry on Dick (1974) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 86 mins |
| In 1750 in Georgian England no respectable citizen is safe on the public thoroughfares because of the scourge of highwaymen who persistently hold-up rich travellers and steal their valuables. The king responds by setting up a squad of law enforcers called the Bow Street Runners whose task it is to make the highways safe once more. The Runners make many arrests but one notorious highwayman continually eludes them - the infamous Dick Turpin, otherwise known as Big Dick because of the size of his pistols. Turpin's modus operandi is to not only steal his victim's valuables but all their clothes as well.
When aristocratic Sir Roger Daley falls victim to Turpin's effrontery he insists that Captain Desmond Fancey of the Runners redouble his efforts to capture the rogue. Fancey and his second-in-command sergeant Jock Strapp travel incognito to the town of Lower Denture which is the epicentre of attacks where they think Turpin must be based. The one clue they have is that Turpin has an unusual mole on his manly part and they set about devising methods to view the said areas of as many men they can. Fancey injudiciously confides his true identity to the local rector Reverend Flasher believing his ecclesiastical position puts him beyond suspicion. However Reverend Flasher is in fact Dick Turpin and along with his buxom housemaid Harriet and his handyman Tom they waylay well-heeled travellers gathering their valuables and accoutrements. Fortuitously forewarned by the Captain's ill-advised disclosure Flasher sets about to discredit Fancey's efforts and bring him disparagement in the face of Sir Roger's scrutiny who already holds his abilities in low esteem. Flasher does not resort to his villainy purely for personal gain but holds church jumble sales for the benefaction of the needy to purchase high quality garments at reasonable prices. But when Sir Roger notices some of his own belongings on sale the slow-witted police officers finally figure out the truth and set about to arrest the Reverend and his cohorts whilst the Sunday church service is being conducted. Reverend Flasher knows the game is up but manages to delay matters by prolonging his service while he, Harriet and Tom arrange their getaway during a long hymn. The outlaws outwit the inept lawmen and head off to Bonnie Scotland. | |
| Starring: | Sidney James (as Big Dick Turpin/Reverend Flasher), Kenneth Williams (as Captain Desmond Fancey, leader of the Bow Street runners), Barbara Windsor (as Harriet, Reverend's housemaid), Hattie Jacques (as Martha Hoggett, Reverend's housekeeper), Peter Butterworth (as Tom, Reverend's handyman), Bernard Bresslaw (as Sir Roger Daley, sponsor of Bow Street runners), Joan Sims (as Madame Desirée, entertainer), Kenneth Connor (as Parish Constable) |
| Featuring: | Jack Douglas (as Sergeant Jock Strapp, Bow Street runner), Patsy Rowlands (as Mrs Giles, villager), Bill Maynard (as Bodkin, inn landlord), John Clive (as Tailor), David Lodge (as Valet), Marianne Stone (as Midwife) |
| Starlets: | Margaret Nolan (as Lady Daley, Sir Roger's wife), Laraine Humphrys Linda Hooks Penny Irving Eva Reuber-Staier (as Madame Desiree's Birds of Paradise) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on a treatment by George Evans |
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This was the 26th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Girls (1973) and the next one was Carry On Behind (1975). |
| Carry on Doctor (1967) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 90 mins |
| Francis Bigger is a faith healer who holds seminars to sell his idea about using the power of positive thinking to help keep oneself safe from harm. But at his latest event his credibility is shot when he falls off the stage and is rushed to hospital with a bad back. Bigger is put on a ward with other patients, including:- Charlie, who is feigning symptoms so he can stay longer in hospital away from his nagging wife; feeble expectant father Mr Barron, who is having sympathetic labour pains; and Ken Biddle, who fancies a young woman patient he spotted in the female ward called Mavis Winkle but is unable to meet her because of the hospital's strict rules against opposite gender patient fraternisation.
Bigger finds the ward so unseemly that he gets himself moved to a private room. The hospital registrar Doctor Kenneth Tinkle examines Bigger's injured back and decides there is little that can be done. Bigger takes this badly thinking it must be serious (although Tinkle actually meant that there was no treatment that would hasten recovery). When Bigger overhears Tinkle saying he can only give him a few more days he thinks he must be on the verge of death (although Tinkle meant he wants to discharge him in a few days so they can free up the room). Bigger decides to do the decent thing and marry his unattractive, trying deaf assistant Chloe Gibson, because he knows she adores him, and although he finds her decidedly unappealing it won't matter to him because he'll soon be dead and the gesture will make her happy. The hospital chaplain conducts a bedside marriage ceremony for them. A sexy student nurse called Sandra May arrives much to Dr Tinkle's chagrin because he has met her before as a patient and she developed a crush on him. He cannot risk his reputation by associating with her. Matron has feelings for Dr Tinkle and wants to help him. So when a young doctor called Jim Kilmore makes a fool of himself by appearing to be a peeping tom, Matron and Tinkle conspire to make it into a scandal and dismiss both Sandra and Kilmore. But Kilmore is very popular with the patients and they think his treatment is unfair so the male and female patients band together to extract a confession out of both Matron and Tinkle with a dreaded blanket bath and an amateur operation respectively. Tinkle caves in and confesses their deeds and Kilmore is reinstated. Tinkle gets a last laugh on Bigger however when the faith healer discovers he is not dying after all and is now married to his dowdy assistant. | |
| Starring: | Frankie Howerd (as Francis Bigger, faith healer, patient), Kenneth Williams (as Doctor Kenneth Tinkle, registrar), Jim Dale (as Doctor Jim Kilmore, doctor), Barbara Windsor (as Nurse Sandra May, trainee), Hattie Jacques (as Matron, [called Lavinia]), Sidney James (as Charlie Roper, patient), Bernard Bresslaw (as Ken Biddle, patient who fancies Mavis), Joan Sims (as Chloe Gibson, Bigger's deaf assistant), Charles Hawtrey (as Mr Barron, patient), Dilys Laye (as Mavis Winkle, patient who fancies Ken Biddle) |
| Featuring: | Anita Harris (as Nurse Clarke), Peter Butterworth (as Mr Smith, patient), June Jago (as Sister Hoggett), Julian Orchard (as Fred, Ken Biddle's visitor), Derek Francis (as Sir Edmund Burke, chairman of hospital committee), Dandy Nichols (as Mrs Roper, Charlie's wife), Peter Jones (as Hospital Chaplain), Gwendolyn Watts (as Mildred, Mr Barron's wife), Peter Gilmore and Harry Locke (as Ambulance Men), Marianne Stone (as Mother of little boy), Valerie Van Ost (as Nurse Parkin), Lucy Griffiths (as Elderly Patient) |
| Familiar Faces: | Deryck Guyler (as Mr Hardcastle, twitchy surgeon, [one scene]), Brian Wilde (as Salesman), Pat Coombs (as Anxious Patient, [uncredited]) |
| Starlets: | Alexandra Dane (as Ante-Natal Instructor, [uncredited]), Cheryl Molineaux (as Women's Ward Nurse, [uncredited]), Jenny White (as Nurse in Bath) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 15th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Follow That Camel (1967) and the next one was Carry On Up The Khyber (1968) |
| Carry on Emmannuelle (1978) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Lance Peters / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 84 mins |
| Emmannuelle Prevert is flying to England on Concorde to rejoin her husband Emile after a long period travelling around Europe. She has a voracious sexual appetite and on the plane easily makes eyes with a passenger called Theo and lures him into the toilet cubicle for some sex. Theo is a shy nervous 30-something man who normally has no luck with women and the casual encounter means a great deal more to him than it does her.
Emile is the French Ambassador and lives in the official residency with a full staff of servants. When Emmannuelle arrives she immediately wants to get amorous with her husband but he strives to fend off her passions for reasons as yet unclear - instead he prefers to get his weedy body into shape doing exercises. So Emmannuelle explores other avenues and has a string of encounters with the country's most important men up to and including the Prime Minister. Meanwhile Theo, the man she met on the plane coming over, is lovesick and can't stop thinking about her - he becomes obsessed and follows her around taking pictures of her meetings with the VIP's. He eventually plucks up the courage to go and see her. She barely recalls him and finds his crush on her faintly amusing when he tells her he would like her to give up her dallying ways and settle down with him instead. In desperation at this rejection Theo talks to a newspaper reporter and hands over the pictures he has taken of her. The pictures are dynamite because of all the VIP's involved and Emmannuelle becomes a media celebrity. The scandal is short-lived however because she had bedded both the Prime Minister and Leader of the Opposition alike and so neither can make political capital of it. Emile goes to a doctor to see if his lack of sexual interest in his wife can be cured. It all stemmed from a day when he and Emmannuelle went nude skydiving and he floated down with unfortunate results onto a church spire. The doctor cures him of his psychological problem and he and Emmannuelle enjoy a reinvigorated sex life again. Not long after she falls pregnant which surprises her because she thought she was on the pill until Emile admits he substituted her contraceptive pills for fertility pills. And nine months later she gives birth to a whole brood of babies. THE END. | |
| Starring: | Suzanne Danielle (as Emmannuelle Prevert), Kenneth Williams (as Emile Prevert, French ambassador and Emmannuelle's husband), Kenneth Connor (as Leyland, chauffeur), Joan Sims (as Mrs Dangle, cook), Jack Douglas (as Lyons, butler), Peter Butterworth (as Richmond, footman), Larry Dann (as Theodore Valentine) |
| Featuring: | Beryl Reid (as Mrs Valentine, Theo's mother), Henry McGee (as Harold Hump, TV Presenter), Dino Shafeek (as Immigration Officer), Howard Nelson (as Harry Hernia) |
| Starlets: | Claire Davenport (as Large woman in Pub), Tricia Newby (as Doctor's Surgery Nurse), Louise Burton (as Girl at Zoo), Deborah Brayshaw (as French Girl in Field), Jane Norman (as Newspaper Reporter), Suzanna East (as Colette, French Parson's Daughter) |
| NOTES: | |
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Suzanne Danielle receives an "introducing" credit. |
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The "Emmannuelle" of this film has her name spelt slightly differently to the "Emmanuelle" of the erotic Sylvia Kristel films which this film spoofs - apparently to circumvent any legal problems. |
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Although "Carry On" films are often shown this particular one along with Carry on England (1976) are shown much less often. |
| Carry On England (1976) | Previous Next |
| Writers: David Pursall, Jack Seddon / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 85 mins |
| Wartime England in 1940. Captain S. Melly is given a new posting to what is called an "experimental" air defence base. Upon arrival he discovers that the experiment in question is that the base is manned by both men and women soldiers. He finds disciplinary standards very lax despite the best efforts of the officious sergeant-major who has seemingly resigned himself to certain irregularities of soldierly conduct and the open fraternisation that goes on. Melly is determined to tighten things up but meets dogged resistance from the men and women under his command who sabotage his every attempt to improve standards so they can maintain their cosy situation. | |
| Starring: | Kenneth Connor (as Captain S. Melly), Windsor Davies (as Sergeant-Major), Judy Geeson (as Sergeant Tilly Willing), Patrick Mower (as Sergeant Len Able) |
| Featuring: | Jack Douglas, Joan Sims, Melvyn Hayes, Peter Butterworth, Peter Jones |
| Familiar Faces: | Johnny Briggs |
| Starlets: | Diane Langton, Tricia Newby, Linda Regan, Jeannie Collings, Louise Burton, Barbara Hampshire, Barbara Rosenblat (as ATS), Linda Hooks (as Nurse) |
| NOTES: | |
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There are two versions of the topless parade scene - the original longer version is when the girls are seen topless for long periods as they stand there and argue back at the commander. When the film was poorly received at the box office it was re-edited to get a lower rating certification - and in the revised version the girls are only momentarily seen topless. There are also some dialogue changes in another scene that distinguish the versions. The full version is the one reviewed here. |
| Carry on Henry (1971) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 86 mins |
| The untold tale of two extra wives of King Henry VIII. Following the execution of his latest wife King Henry has his next wife Marie lined up at the church altar all ready to go. Marie is a French noblewoman who is the favourite cousin of King Francis, the French monarch. Unfortunately Marie has a fondness for garlic and Henry is so appalled by the smell that he cannot go near her and demands his advisers arrange an immediate annulment on the grounds of non-consummation. The Vatican demands a significant payment of crowns to grant this request and the approval process is a lengthy one.
Meanwhile the randy new queen partakes her pleasures with one of the king's advisers Sir Roger de Lodgerley instead. Eventually she becomes with-child and at first Henry is pleased he is going to have a new heir until he realises it can't have been him. And worse still, now the Vatican are not going to believe the marriage was unconsummated so he is stuck with her. His adviser Thomas Cromwell tells him this is better than an annulment because Henry can have her executed for infidelity as long as they can get Sir Roger to sign a confession. After many weeks of torture Sir Roger finally capitulates and signs the confession which will condemn the queen. However the King of France hears of his cousin's pregnancy and offers a huge cash gift to honour the baby's birth. This incentive changes Henry's mind and he decides he will accept the baby as his own after all. But first Sir Roger has to be tortured again for him to sign a retraction stating his original confession was false. Queen Marie returns to court by the king's side. But then Henry's head is turned by a beautiful new arrival called Bettina and he decides he wants to marry her and he no longer cares about the French money. So Sir Roger has to be tortured again to retract his retraction and re-confess his first confession. Upon getting this Henry immediately marries Bettina. But then the King of France arrives concerned with all the worrying stories he has heard of his favourite cousin. He threatens war if Queen Marie is not reinstated immediately. So Sir Roger has to be tortured again to get another retraction of his re-confession and Queen Marie returns to the king's bedchamber and has her baby. King Henry manages to convince Bettina that there was a legal technicality in their marriage and so they were never really married and she is happy about that because King Francis has taken a fancy to her and so she travels back to France with him to become his Queen instead. All seems settled until Henry's head is turned by the queen's new lady in waiting Katherine Howard ... (THE END) | |
| Comment: There is also a subplot involving a group of rebels conspiring against the king's life. | |
| Starring: | Sidney James (as King Henry VIII), Kenneth Williams (as Thomas Cromwell), Charles Hawtrey (as Sir Roger de Lodgerley), Joan Sims (as Queen Marie), Terry Scott (as Cardinal Wolsey), Barbara Windsor (as Bettina) |
| Featuring: | Kenneth Connor (as Lord Hampton of Wick, plotter), Julian Holloway (as Sir Thomas, Henry's hunting friend), Peter Gilmore (as King of France), Julian Orchard (as Duc de Poncenay, French ambassador), Gertan Klauber (as Bidet, King Francis' adviser), Peter Butterworth (as Bettina's father, small role), William Mervyn (as Physician), Bill Maynard (as Guy Fawkes, plotter), Norman Chappell (as Plotter), Derek Francis (as milkmaid's father), Leon Greene and Dave Prowse (as Torturers) |
| Starlets: | Margaret Nolan (as Buxom milkmaid), Monika Dietrich (as Katherine Howard), Marjie Lawrence (as Serving Maid) |
| NOTES: | |
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The mention of Katherine Howard at the end seems to place these events between Henry's fourth and fifth marriages. Although that can't be so because his fourth wife Anne of Cleves was not executed (as shown at the start of the film) and survived until after Henry's death in 1547. Also the inclusion of Guy Fawkes as one of the conspirators is completely anachronistic because the plot in which he was involved was not until 1605 and furthermore he wasn't born until 23 years after Henry had died. |
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This was the 21st Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Loving (1970) and the next one was Carry On At Your Convenience (1971). |
| Carry on Loving (1970) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 86 mins |
| Sidney Bliss and his business partner Sophie Plummett run a dating agency called Wedded Bliss. They pretend to be a happily married couple for the benefit of their clients but are in fact unmarried and forever bickering. Sophie does not approve of Sid's wont to personally vet all the attractive female clients - in particular Esme Crowfoot whom she suspects Sid is having an affair with. The agency couple's tribulations are interwoven with the stories of a number of their clients who make use of their dating service:-
Shy virgin Bertrum Muffet is told to meet up with his perfect partner in a bar but he accidentally meets a model called Sally Martin who is waiting for a photographer to come and take some saucy snaps of her. They both think the other is the one they are expecting and this leads to a cross-purposes situation back at her flat. Eventually with the truth revealed Bertrum flees in embarrassment but Sally feels sorry for him and later seeks him out for a date and they become a proper couple. Terence Philpot wants to meet a raver but is most disappointed when he is sent to the house of shy and dowdy Jenny Grubb who lives with all her morose extended family. Terry returns to the agency demanding his money back but then changes his mind when he meets Jenny away from her restrictive family and finds she is actually a bubbly ravishing beauty who has just started a modelling career. Sid is continuing to see Esme Crowfoot although his efforts are made all the harder by the return of her wrestler ex-boyfriend who wants her back. Meanwhile confirmed bachelor and marriage guidance counsellor Percival Snooper is told by his boss he should find a wife so that he is more suitably qualified to issue advice to couples in difficulty - so he goes to the Wedded Bliss agency for help. Sophie, who has finally despaired of Sid ever showing any romantic interest in her, suggests herself to Percival as an ideal wife. They become engaged and she leaves the agency. Sid realises he cannot run the agency without Sophie and sets about to change her mind by making it appear that Percival is actually an incorrigible womaniser. Sophie returns to the agency and Sid agrees to marry her so that she will stay. They invite all their clients to the wedding reception which degenerates into a slapstick custard pie throwing fiasco. | |
| Starring: | Sidney James (as Sidney Bliss), Hattie Jacques (as Sophie Plummett, Sid's business partner) (clients) Kenneth Williams (as Percival Snooper, Marriage Guidance Counsellor at Citizens Advice Bureau), Terry Scott (as Terence Philpot), Joan Sims (as Esme Crowfoot, Sid's fancy), Richard O'Callaghan (as Bertrum Muffet), Imogen Hassall (as Jenny Grubb, meets up with Terry) Jacki Piper (as Sally Martin, model/actress who meets up with Bertrum), Charles Hawtrey (as James Bedsop, private detective Sophie hires to follow Sid), Bernard Bresslaw (as Gripper Burke, Esme's ex-boyfriend) |
| Featuring: | Patsy Rowlands (as Miss Dempsey, Percival's jealous housekeeper), Joan Hickson (as Jenny's mother) Julian Holloway (as Adrian, Gay's photographer boyfriend), Bill Maynard and Patricia Franklin (as Mr and Mrs Dreery, marriage guidance clients), Peter Butterworth (as Agency client, [brief appearance only]) |
| Familiar Faces: | Bill Pertwee (as Barman), Kenny Lynch (as Bus Conductor) |
| Starlets: | Janet Mahoney (as Gay, Sally's flatmate), Alexandra Dane (as Satisfied agency client, [with Ronnie Brody]) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 20th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Up The Jungle (1970) and the next one was Carry On Henry (1970) |
| Carry on Matron (1972) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 85 mins |
| A gang of crooks led by Sid Carter has set its sights on stealing a lucrative hoard of contraceptive pills from the Finisham Maternity Hospital which they can sell abroad for a small fortune. They need a man on the inside to obtain floor plans and find out where the pills are stored, so Sid persuades his gang-member son Cyril to dress up as a woman and pretend to be one of a new intake of student nurses.
Cyril calls himself Cyrille and rooms with sexy nurse Susan Ball whom he fancies but can't let her know. Unfortunately for him randy Doctor Prodd takes a liking to Cyrille and starts pursuing "her" for some rumpy-pumpy. Cyrille is called upon to deliver a movie star's baby in an emergency and subsequently gets "her" picture in the paper alongside the proud new mum. This gives the hospital some good publicity but displeases Sid who had wanted his son to maintain a low profile. Nurse Ball finds out the truth about Cyril's gender but doesn't mind and they become romantic. Elsewhere in a subplot, hospital administrator Sir Bernard Cutting is so hypochondriacally neurotic he believes he has any illness or condition imaginable upon the slightest hint of a symptom. Currently he thinks he is turning into a woman and so starts seducing the matron to re-assert his manhood. Back with the main action, Cyril eventually gets hold of the hospital floor diagrams for his father and Sid plans the next stage of their operation. Sid and another of his cohorts pose as a foreign doctor and expectant mother respectively. Accompanied by Nurse Cyrille they are let into the building for an emergency delivery - but instead they go to the storeroom. They have to blow the door off with dynamite which causes an almighty din and the hospital staff are alerted. All the exits are locked and eventually the crooks are cornered by Sir Bernard. Sid knows the game is up but then plays his trump card and reveals that hero nurse Cyrille is actually a man and if that got into the papers it would be very embarrassing for the hospital. So Sir Bernard is forced to relent and the felons are allowed to leave in return for their silence, although they are not allowed to take the pills. Sir Bernard and Matron get married and it looks as though Cyril and Nurse Susan will be next. Meanwhile Sid is already planning another audacious job but his cohorts have had enough of his harebrained schemes and scarper ... | |
| Starring: | Sidney James (as Sid Carter, gang leader), Kenneth Williams (as Sir Bernard Cutting, hospital consultant), Hattie Jacques (as Matron), Kenneth Cope (as Cyril Carter, Sid's son), Charles Hawtrey (as Dr Francis A. Goode, psychiatrist), Terry Scott (as Dr Prodd, womaniser), Barbara Windsor (as Nurse Susan Ball), Joan Sims (as Mrs Tidey, overdue mum), Kenneth Connor (as Mr Tidey, expectant father), Bernard Bresslaw (as Ernie Bragg, in Sid's gang), Bill Maynard (as Freddy, in Sid's gang |
| Featuring: | Derek Francis (as Arthur, hospital porter), Jacki Piper (as Sister), Patsy Rowlands (as Evelyn Banks, Sir Bernard's secretary), Valerie Leon (as Jane Darling, patient, film star), Robin Hunter (as Mr Darling, Jane's husband), Michael Nightingale (as Pearson, X-ray consultant), Gwendolyn Watts (as Frances Kemp, hospital receptionist), Jack Douglas (as Twitching Father) |
| Starlets: | Wendy Richard (as Miss Willing, departing new mother), Madeline Smith (as Mrs Pullitt, new mother), Valerie Shute (as Miss Smethurst, upset at pregnancy news), Margaret Nolan (as Mrs Tucker, busty blonde patient), Gilly Grant (as Nurse in Bath), Lindsay Marsh (as Nurse in her underwear), Zena Clifton (as Darlings' Au Pair Girl) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 23rd Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On At Your Convenience (1971) and the next one was Carry On Abroad (1972) |
| Carry on Screaming! (1966) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 92 mins |
| Set in the early 1900s. Window cleaner Albert Potter is in Holcombe Woods spending quality time with his sweetheart Doris when they hear strange noises. Albert goes to take a look and when he returns Doris has disappeared. Albert reports the disappearance to Detective Sergeant Sidney Bung of the local constabulary. Bung likes to keep busy because his wife Emily is forever nagging him and so he starts his investigations immediately. There have been a series of mysterious disappearances of young women in the same locale which Bung and his slow-witted subordinate Detective Constable Slobotham have been unable to solve.
The detectives decide to enquire at the nearby gothic manor to find out if the owners heard anything unusual. The manor is occupied by a scientist called Doctor Orlando Watt and his vivacious sister Valeria. They claim to know nothing of the incidents, however secretly they are behind it. Doctor Watt has invented an electrical process to bring dead things back to life after injecting them with his special preparatory fluid. Watt himself is dead and had himself revived. He uses a revived Neanderthal creature named Oddbod to venture out into the woods and abduct young women. Dr Watt and his sister then put the women through a vitrifying process which turns them into plastic shop window manikins which the pair sell to clothes shops as a lucrative money making business. Doris has undergone this process and has been turned into a manikin and sold to a store. Later when Albert sees the Doris manikin in a shop window he is convinced it is his sweetheart despite his claims seeming ludicrous to the detectives because the dummy is so clearly made of plastic. DS Bung returns to the manor to ask further questions and Valeria decides the Doris manikin must be retrieved. She uses her sultry charms on Bung and laces his drink with a potion she obtained from a certain Dr Jekyll. This turns Bung into an immensely strong but mindless brute who obeys Valeria's instructions to break into the shop at night and retrieve the manikin. Bung wakes up the next day returned to normal but remembering nothing. Bung decides to lay a trap and with Slobotham dressed up as a woman they go into the woods hoping to bait the kidnapper into action and catch him in the act. But it goes wrong and Slobotham is abducted and brought to Watt's basement laboratory to undergo the vitrification process - that is until the evildoers realise he is a man. Bung's wife Emily was following her husband thinking he was having an affair and she too is abducted. She is vitrified and packed up ready to be sold as a manikin. Bung teams up with Albert and they follow some footprints which lead them to the manor. They find the Doris manikin and work out how to reverse the process to return her to normal. But they are soon discovered and face death at the hands of Oddbod and his clone Oddbod junior. Albert takes a swig of drink for courage which turns out to be Jekyll's potion and this turns him into a creature strong enough to defeat the Neanderthals. But the heroes are still at the mercy of Dr Watt until a bolt of lightning strikes one of Dr Watt's Egyptian mummy exhibits which he had already injected with preparatory fluid in readiness. The power reanimates the mummy and it turns on Watt and he falls into his own vat of boiling vitrifying fluid and dies. Albert and Doris get married and Bung decides he prefers his wife as a mute manikin and has Valeria move in to be his mistress instead now she is no longer under the bad influence of her evil brother. | |
| Starring: | Harry H. Corbett (as Detective Sergeant Sidney Bung), Kenneth Williams (as Doctor Orlando Watt), Jim Dale (as Albert Potter), Peter Butterworth (as Detective Constable Slobotham), Fenella Fielding (as Valeria Watt, Orlando's sister), Joan Sims (as Emily Bung, Sidney's wife) |
| Featuring: | Charles Hawtrey (as Dan Dann, cloakroom attendant, [small part]), Angela Douglas (as Doris Mann, Albert's girlfriend), Bernard Bresslaw (as Sockett, Watt's butler), Tom Clegg (as Oddbod), Billy Cornelius (as Oddbod Junior), Norman Mitchell (as Cabby) |
| Familiar Faces: | Jon Pertwee (as Doctor Fettle, eccentric police scientist), Frank Thornton (as Mr Jones, manager of millinery shop), Frank Forsyth (as Desk Sergeant) |
| Starlets: | Sally Douglas (as First abducted girl) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 12th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Cowboy (1965) and the next one was Carry On Don't Lose Your Head (1966) |
| aka: Follow That Camel | |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 91 mins |
| Set in 1906. Bertram Oliphant West (Bo for short) is one of the rich gentry living a privileged life and looking forward to marriage to his fiancée Lady Jane Ponsonby. But when a love rival falsely accuses him of cheating at cricket Bo is unable to clear his name and Jane spurns him for being a cad. Bo retires from society in shame and decides to go abroad and join the French Foreign Legion with only his faithful manservant Simpson for company.
Commandant Maximilian Burger is in charge of the legion's fort in an (unspecified) Arab country. The legion are facing an imminent uprising by an Arab faction called the Riffs led by Sheikh Abdul Abulbul. The garrison's colour sergeant is an American called Sergeant Nocker who has been awarded numerous awards for gallantry. On many occasions he goes missing for days and returns relating stories of how he single-handedly overcame great odds against the enemy - although what the commandant does not know is that Nocker is actually having fun visiting his woman in town during these times. Bo and Simpson arrive at the fort expecting to still be afforded the same comforts they are used to back home. They soon find out that army life is no picnic and they are allocated the worst duties by Sergeant Nocker who relishes bringing the mollycoddled Englishman down a peg or to. That is until Bo discovers Nocker's guilty secret and then the sergeant goes out of his way to be nice to them so they won't tell the Commandant about his AWOL activities. Back home in England, Jane finds out the truth about the cheating allegations and realises that Bo was innocent. She decides she must travel abroad alone to find him and inform him he has been exonerated and she still loves him. Jane is very innocent about the ways of men and finds herself constantly harassed on her journey when men find out she is travelling alone. And after a while she begins to like it. When Jane gets to the Arab country she attracts the attention of the Sheikh who invites her to his encampment in the desert where he plans to add her to his harem of wives. The Sheikh also captures Nocker, Bo and Simpson in a honey-trap using his favourite woman Corktip. After several days Nocker manages to escape and return to the garrison to inform the Commandant of what has happened. But Burger has just discovered how Nocker has lied to him about his past bravery and disbelieves his latest story. Nocker is thrown into the cells and by the time he manages to convince Burger that this time he is telling the truth, several more days have gone by. A unit of legionnaires is despatched to the Arab camp in the desert but the Riffs have moved on taking Jane with them. Bo and Simpson had been left staked out on the sand to die and they are rescued just in time. The unit decide to march onto Fort Zuassantneuf to help protect it. It is a long march without water and when they find the new Arab camp only a handful of gallant legionnaires remain standing. They manage to rescue Jane and make it to the now-unmanned fort whose entire number have been massacred by the Riffs in an earlier attack. The legionnaires have barely any weapons so they improvise with what they find in the storeroom to try and hold the Riffs at bay outside. Using sticky gum moats and gunpowder-filled coconut bombs launched by Bo with a cricket bat they successfully defend the fort and just in the nick of time a fresh unit of reinforcements arrive and the Riffs turn tail and run. Jane explains to Bo how he was blameless in the cricket cheating scandal and they return home to England to get married. | |
| Starring: | Jim Dale (as Bo West), Phil Silvers (as Sergeant Nocker), Kenneth Williams (as Commandant Maximilian Burger), Peter Butterworth (as Simpson, Bo's personal manservant), Charles Hawtrey (as Captain Le Pice, Burger's subordinate), Angela Douglas (as Lady Jane Ponsonby, Bo's sweetheart), Bernard Bresslaw (as Sheikh Abdul Abulbul), Joan Sims (as Zig-Zig, café owner) |
| Featuring: | Anita Harris (as Corktip, Sheikh's woman), John Bluthal (as Corporal Clotski, foreign legion), William Mervyn (as Sir Cyril Ponsonby, Jane's father), Peter Gilmore (as Captain Humphrey Bagshaw, Bo's love rival for Jane), Julian Holloway (as Ticket Collector on train), Julian Orchard (as Doctor) |
| NOTES: | |
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The version reviewed carried the non "Carry On" version of the title as it was originally released |
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This was the 14th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Don't Lose Your Head (1966) and the next one was Carry On Doctor (1967) |
| Writer: Talbot Rothwell / Director: Gerald Thomas / Producer: Peter Rogers | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 85 mins |
| Set in 1895 in India when the country was ruled by the British Empire. Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond is the British governor of the northern province of Kalabar and he and his wife Lady Ruff-Diamond enjoy all the privileges of high office. The Khasi of Kalabar, who is the richest and most powerful Raj in all of Northern India, despises Sir Sidney and all British although he is forced to put on a show of friendly acceptance due to British military supremacy.
The Khyber Pass is the gateway between Afghanistan and India which is guarded at all times by a detachment of the Scottish Highland regiment. These kilt-wearing soldiers are known by the locals as "The Devils in Skirts" because of their reputation for wearing nothing underneath their kilts. No local Burpa would dare take arms against such fearsome men. However all that changes when Burpa leader Bungdit Din discovers that a lily-livered guardsman called Private Jimmy Widdle wears thermal underpants to ward off the cold. Sir Sidney takes this breach of regulations very seriously and orders a parade of the men to raise their kilts to ensure none of the others are flouting the proud regimental tradition. Unfortunately all of them are wearing underpants and even worse Lady Ruff-Diamond secretly takes a revealing photograph of the parade showing the full extent of their shame. Lady Ruff-Diamond has a secret fancy for the Khasi and hopes that with this photograph she can win his affection. The Khasi is delighted to receive such damning evidence and uses it to prove to the Burpas that they have nothing to fear from the British pigs and it is at last time to rise up and slaughter them all and take the country back from the invaders. The Khasi leads the Burpas to attack the British compound with guns and cannons but he is bewildered that the only British response is to have a dinner party and totally ignore the onslaught as if it wasn't happening. The Governor has decided that a display of stiff upper lip is called for. Only when the Burpas finally break into the compound does the Governor decide it is time to make his move. He calls the men to parade in a line facing the Burpas and orders then to raise their kilts. This time the men are appropriately undressed and the Burpas flee in fear and panic at the horror of what they see and the rebellion is quelled. | |
| Comment: There is additionally an attempt by a group of soldiers led by Captain Keene to infiltrate the Burpa Leader's palace to recover the photo and rescue Lady Ruff-Diamond. This ends in capture and eventual escape with assistance from the Khasi's daughter Princess Jelli who has fallen in love with the Captain. | |
| Starring: | Sidney James (as Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond), Kenneth Williams (as The Khasi of Kalabar), Roy Castle (as Captain Keene), Charles Hawtrey (as Private Jimmy Widdle), Joan Sims (as Lady Joan Ruff-Diamond), Terry Scott (as Sergeant-Major MacNutt), Peter Butterworth (as Brother Belcher, missionary), Bernard Bresslaw (as Bungdit Din, Burpa leader) |
| Featuring: | Julian Holloway (as Major Shorthouse, Sir Sidney's private secretary), Angela Douglas (as Princess Jelhi, Khasi's daughter), Cardew Robinson (as The Fakir, illusionist) |
| Starlets: | Wanda Ventham (as Khasi's First Wife), Alexandra Dane (as Busti, hospitality girl), Dominique Don (as Girl who lures Brother Belcher) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the 16th Carry On film. The previous one was Carry On Doctor (1967) and the next one was Carry On Camping (1969) |
| Casino Royale (1967) | Previous Next |
| Writers: (Various) / Director: (Multiple) / Producers: Charles K. Feldman, Jerry Bresler | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 125 mins |
| The British Secret Service are in crisis with their agents from all over the world being eliminated by the criminal organisation SMERSH. So Secret Service boss M turns to the agency's greatest ever spy Sir James Bond for help. Sir James has now retired and lives a comfortable life in a mansion and has no wish to return to service but M gives him no choice by blowing up his house - although M himself dies in the attack.
Sir James therefore takes over M's role as the head of MI5 and institutes immediate changes. The name of "James Bond 007" is revered all over the world and so Sir James decrees that all agents will now be known by that name to confuse the enemy into thinking that he has returned to active service. Sir James authorises a number of separate operations to undermine SMERSH. He asks beautiful businesswoman Vesper Lynd to recruit a card sharp called Evelyn Tremble to become a "James Bond" and play baccarat with SMERSH boss Le Chiffre at the Casino Royale and put pressure on their fragile finances. Sir James also recruits his own daughter Mata Bond (whom he sired with famous lady spy Mata Hari) to put further pressure on SMERSH income by disrupting an auction of blackmail photos at a spy school. Finally as events comes to a head Sir James is obliged to go into action himself and discovers that the real head of SMERSH is actually his own nephew Jimmy Bond. Jimmy is a weedy unimposing young man who is self-conscious of his short stature and grew up intimidated by his legendary uncle and so joined SMERSH and rose to the top. Jimmy's two-pronged master-plan is to release a virus that will make all women beautiful and kill-off any men taller than himself - and also he plans to replace top officials with robot doubles. Sir James and his associates manage to foil Jimmy's plans and everything ends with a massive free-for-all punch-up in the Casino at the conclusion of which the whole place blows up and everyone dies - including Sir James. | |
| Starring: | David Niven (as Sir James Bond, retired masterspy), Ursula Andress (as Vesper Lynd, international businesswoman), Peter Sellers (as Evelyn Tremble, card sharp), Joanna Pettet (as Mata Bond, Sir James' daughter), Woody Allen (as Dr Noah/Jimmy Bond, Sir James' nephew), Orson Welles (as Le Chiffre, criminal), Deborah Kerr (as SMERSH Agent Mimi, posing as M's widow) |
| Featuring: | Daliah Lavi (as The Detainer, agent), Barbara Bouchet (as Moneypenny, the original's daughter), Anna Quayle (as Frau Hoffner, head of international spy school), Ronnie Corbett (as Frau Hoffner's butler), Geoffrey Bayldon (as Q, MI5 gadget specialist), Vladek Sheybal (as Le Chiffre's Representative, at auction), Bernard Cribbins (as Taxi Driver), Terence Cooper (as Cooper, James Bond tryout), John Huston (as M, MI5 boss), William Holden (as Ransome, CIA boss) |
| Familiar Faces: | (in small roles) Derek Nimmo (as M's assistant), John Bluthal (as Casino Doorman), John Wells (as Q's Assistant), Graham Stark (as Casino Cashier), Richard Wattis (as British Army Officer, at auction), Burt Kwouk (as Chinese General), John Le Mesurier (as M's Driver), Peter O'Toole (as Piper) |
| Starlets: | Angela Scoular, Gabriella Licudi, Tracey Crisp Elaine Taylor, Alexandra Bastedo (as SMERSH agents, posing as M's daughters), Jacky Bisset (as Miss Goodthighs, seductive enemy agent), Penny Riley (as SMERSH Control Girl), Jennifer and Susan Baker (as Le Chiffre's twin assistants) |
| NOTES: | |
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Writers: Wolf Mankowitz, John Law and Michael Sayers |
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Directors: John Huston, Kenneth Hughes, Val Guest, Robert Parrish and Joseph McGrath |
| Writer: Peter Welbeck / Director: Jess Franco / Producer: Harry Alan Towers | |
| Type: Adventure | Running Time: 88 mins |
| Set in the 1950s(?). The megalomaniacal Chinese criminal Fu Manchu has launched his latest plan for world domination with a demonstration of his power that results in the sinking of a passenger liner in the tropical Caribbean sea when it hits an iceberg. Fu Manchu has abducted a chemist called Professor Heracles who has developed a method of super-cooling water using a crystallised essence.
The crystals are made using an opium derivative and so Fu Manchu and his daughter Lin Tang have taken over a castle near Istanbul in Turkey on the Anatolian plateau which is the stronghold of the largest opium source in the world. Fu Manchu announces his demands of obedience to the world lest he punitively freeze vast oceans and the British Home Office call in Scotland Yard detective Nayland Smith and his erstwhile colleague Doctor Petrie who have successfully foiled Fu Manchu in the past. Smith and Petrie head off to Istanbul. Meanwhile Professor Heracles, upon whom Fu Manchu is dependant for the crystals, is seriously ill with a heart condition. So the criminal mastermind has a London heart specialist called Curt Kessler and his assistant Ingrid abducted and forces them to perform a heart transplant operation with a healthy man that Fu Manchu has hypnotised for that purpose. Kessler has no choice but to agree because Ingrid's life is threatened and the operation is successful. Afterwards the two of them are held prisoners with an uncertain future. Nayland Smith infiltrates the castle just as Fu Manchu has begun a countdown to freeze the Bosporus. He rescues Heracles and Kessler and Ingrid manage to get free. Fu Manchu's efforts to recapture them go wrong and his well-laid plans unravel as the massive power outlay requirements of his equipment cause an explosion which destroys the castle. The fate of Fu Manchu and Lin Tang are undetermined but it seems certain that the world shall hear from them again. | |
| Starring: | Christopher Lee (as Fu Manchu), Richard Greene (as Nayland Smith), Howard Marion Crawford (Dr Petrie, Smith's friend), Tsai Chin (as Lin Tang, daughter of Fu Manchu) |
| Featuring: | Günther Stoll (as Dr Curt Kessler, heart specialist), Maria Perschy (as Ingrid, Dr Kessler's assistant, [she incorrectly appears on credits with the character name of "Marie"]), José Manuel Martín (as Omar Pashu, Turkish criminal trader), Rosalba Neri (as Lisa, Omar's girlfriend), Jess Franco (as Turkish detective, [uncredited]), Gustavo Re (as Professor Heracles, chemist, [uncredited]), Werner Aprelat (as Melnik, Turkish informant) |
| Familiar Faces: | Burt Kwouk (as Panicking operator in Fu Manchu's control room, [uncredited, bit-part]) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the characters created by Sax Rohmer |
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The control room climax of this film when the equipment goes into overload and Fu Manchu and Lin Tang escape are scenes directly reused from The Brides of Fu Manchu. Burt Kwouk is seen in these shots as he was a featured actor in the earlier film although he is not credited for this film. |
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This was the last in a series of five 1960's Fu Manchu films starring Christopher Lee. Each also featured Tsai Chin as his daughter and Howard Marion Crawford as Dr Petrie the friend of Fu Manchu's greatest opponent Nayland Smith. The role of Smith himself was played by three different actors - Nigel Green played him in the first film, next Douglas Wilmer for two films and then Richard Greene for the final two. The sequence of the five films were as follows:- The Face of Fu Manchu (1965), The Brides of Fu Manchu (1966), The Vengeance of Fu Manchu (1967), The Blood of Fu Manchu (1968), The Castle of Fu Manchu (1969). |
| Writer/Director: Radley Metzger / Producer: Richard Gordon | |
| Type: Thriller | Running Time: 93 mins |
| It is 1934 and at a large mansion house called Glencliff Manor the relatives of the late Cyrus West have gathered to hear the reading of his will and find out which of them will become heir to his vast fortune. The atypical aspect of this reading however is that the deceased gentleman passed away twenty years beforehand but had stipulated that his will should not be read out until this day two decades on. Cyrus had a low opinion of all his kin and has engineered this long wait to keep them all guessing and perhaps create rivalries and animosities between them.
Cyrus West planned well and even though sound film technology was in its infancy in 1914 he had had his assistants film him reading out the details of his will. That film was securely preserved in cold storage under lock and key for twenty years and is being played for the first ever time to the six assembled cousins of the late eccentric's grandchild generation - all of whom have varied and successful careers:- sportswoman Susan Sillsby, songwriter Paul Jones, surgeon Harry Blythe, actor Charlie Wilder, Cicily Young and Annabelle West. Although Cyrus had no way of knowing the future conglomeration of his potential beneficiaries his filmed image declares that he has decided to leave his money to whomever amongst their number has retained the family surname of "West". The only one of the various cousins who still bears the West family name is young Annabelle West and everyone congratulates her on her good fortune. Cyrus West's only stipulation is that the person in question must be of sound mind and survive the first twelve hours following the announcement. Otherwise a second film will be played naming the second heir. The six are therefore obliged to spend the night in the mansion in case this should come to pass. As they are preparing for bed a doctor called Hendricks arrives with urgent news warning them that a dangerous lunatic has just escaped from the nearby mental hospital. The escapee believes he is a wild cat who savagely rips his victims to death with his long nails. Hendricks leaves with the advice to keep all doors and windows locked and not to venture out until the man is caught. Needless to say it appears that this "Cat" has stolen into the mansion and first to encounter him is Annabelle. Although when it seems only she ever sees him the others begin to doubt her sanity. But after some deaths and the discovery of a maze of secret passageways honeycombing the house the others begin to believe her story and start searching for the killer. The Cat eventually captures Annabelle and is moments from killing her before she is rescued by Paul. In the end the Cat is revealed as being Charlie Wilder, the actor amongst them. He was in league with Hendricks and together they concocted the escaped lunatic story so Wilder could then play the part once Hendricks had established the danger. Charlie knew that as Cyrus' favourite grandson he was to be named as second heir and was at first hoping to have people believe Annabelle was going mad - but when that did not work he was going to kill her instead. | |
| Starring: | (The Relatives) Honor Blackman (as Susan Sillsby), Michael Callan (as Paul Jones), Olivia Hussey (as Cicily Young), Carol Lynley (as Annabelle West), Daniel Massey (as Harry Blythe), Peter McEnery (as Charlie Wilder) (and) Wendy Hiller (as Allison Crosby, family solicitor), Edward Fox (as Hendricks, psychiatrist from mental hospital), Beatrix Lehmann (as Mrs Pleasant, housekeeper), Wilfrid Hyde White (as Cyrus West) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the play by John Willard |
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Although listed as being from 1979 the film carried a copyright date of 1977. |
| Writer: Lou Rusoff / Director: Alfred Shaughnessy / Producer: Herbert Smith | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 72 mins |
| Present Day setting. At an old house in the country on a stormy night Edmund Brandt is tending to the needs of his pet leopard while awaiting the arrival of his one remaining blood relative, his niece Leonora. A curse is upon the Brandt family and tonight is the night he must pass it onto his next of kin.
Leonora is sitting in a nearby pub anxious about the summons she has received from her uncle by telegram. She lived with him as a child in his creepy house and was glad to get away when she grew up. She had hoped she would never have to go back. Disregarding her uncle's instructions to come alone she has brought along her husband Richard Johnson and two friends Alan and Cathy. She is newly married to Richard who seems very interested in the unspecified legacy she is promised, hoping that they will become rich - Richard is less interested in Leonora herself however and is secretly carrying on with Cathy. After Leonora arrives at Edmund's house with her friends and has settled in the old man takes her to one side and explains the legacy she will inherit. For twenty-six generations since the 13th century the eldest Brandt has been host to a terrible curse. The affliction gives the sufferer a double identity in which they nightly become one with the mind of a wild cat - seeing through its feline eyes and experiencing the hunger for flesh and craving for blood that the animal feels, as well as being able to direct its movements as if it were their own body. Leonora does not want the curse but Edmund tells her she has no choice and begs her not to have any children so that the curse will die out. Then as his final action he commands his leopard to set upon himself and with his death the curse passes to Leonora and she can suddenly feel the leopard's base-instincts within her. With the feeling that she is going mad Leonora turns to a psychiatrist friend of hers called Brian Marlowe. Brian and she were once lovers when they both lived in these parts and although he is now married Leonora still adores him. Brian thinks her mental disturbance is caused by the shock of her uncle's savage death by his pet leopard and she will get over it with some rest. Later in the woods Leonora finds Richard and Cathy carrying on and in her mind her anger at his infidelity swells and the leopard (still on the loose after the attack on Edmund) responds and savages Richard to death. Brian takes Leonora back to London for some psychiatric tests because she still insists on claiming that she was the leopard - but in his presence she is never able to prove any part of her wild story and he concludes she is suffering from a delusional disorder. Eventually he decides that she needs some normality in her life and puts her in the hands of his wife Dorothy for some shopping and woman-chat. But Leonora feels jealousy towards Dorothy because she is married to the man she loves and Dorothy instinctively feels uneasy in her presence. One night when Dorothy is out walking alone through dark deserted streets to meet up for a dinner date with Brian she feels she is being stalked by Leonora. In that area there have been sightings of a leopard prowling (it has followed Leonora to London) and the police have been called in to search for it. In Leonora's mind she wishes Dorothy was out of the picture and the leopard is acting in response. Brian hears about the leopard-sighting on the radio and suddenly realises that Leonora's wild story might actually be true and rushes to the scene in his car knowing Dorothy is in the vicinity. He arrives just in time and manages to knock down and kill the leopard with his car as it is about to attack Dorothy. And nearby, the closely following Leonora collapses and dies looking as if she too has been the victim of a traffic accident. | |
| Starring: | Barbara Shelley (as Leonora), Robert Ayres (as Dr Brian Marlowe, psychiatrist), Kay Callard (as Dorothy Marlowe, Brian's wife), Jack May (as Richard Johnson, Leonora's husband) |
| Featuring: | Ernest Milton (as Edmund Brandt, Leonora's uncle), Lily Kann (as Anna, Edmund's elderly housekeeper), Patricia Webster (as Cathy, Leonora's friend), John Lee (as Alan, Cathy's boyfriend) |
| NOTES: | |
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Made in Black and White |
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Although it would probably have to be classed as a "Horror", any horrific elements are mild and very few and far between with the rest of it dealing with Leonora's mental distress of what has befallen her |
| Writer: Peter Bryan / Director: Pennington Richards / Producer: Clifford Parkes | |
| Type: Adventure | Running Time: 92 mins |
| In Nottinghamshire, England in the 12th century, the de Courtenay family are rich landowners who live at Courtenay Castle. Sir John de Courtenay is the aging squire who, on his deathbed, chooses to bequeath his title and estate to his devoted nephew Robin who has been like a son to him and whom he knows will run the estate with fair-minded honesty. Sir John's black-hearted real son Roger is incensed by this snub to his perceived birthright and defiantly refuses to accept it. He kills his other brother Henry and frames Robin for the murder intending that he will be tried and executed. But Robin has many loyal friends at the castle who help him escape to the nearby forest of Sherwood.
In the forest Robin meets up with a loose band of former Saxon noblemen whose opposition to the rule of King John have seen them cast out of society to become outlaws. Robin gains their trust and becomes their leader organising them into a close-knit unit with a new purpose to oppose tyranny and help the poor in society. This they achieve by robbing from rich merchants and redistributing the wealth amongst the oppressed villagers. Meanwhile Roger rules from the castle with a cruel and merciless hand. He lays on debauched banquets for the rich gentry. He welcomes a visit from the Sherriff of Nottingham who approves of Roger's methods but insists that the troublesome Robin should be swiftly dealt with. Roger and the Sherriff plan a number of traps employing deceitful kidnapping tactics designed to bait Robin out of the safety of his forest hideout to rescue his friends. But Robin's skill and cunning overcomes these and he always manages to win through to gain an even greater reputation. On one such occasion Robin rescues visiting noblewoman Lady Marian from the Sherriff's licentious clutches and she joins the men of the forest. Robin and Marian begin to fall in love. Robin's unrelenting campaign of wealth redistribution is taking its toll on the castle's finances and Roger is becoming increasingly furious that he can no longer enjoy the opulent luxuries he is used to. The Sherriff's men manage to recapture Marian which forces Robin to surrender himself to his opponents' cruel justice in order to secure her release. Robin's men organise a stealthy encroachment into the castle using secret passages and stage an uprising against the current regime with the help of guards still secretly loyal to Robin. Robin and Roger have a fight to the death which Robin wins although unfortunately the Sherriff manages to get away to fight another day. Robin and Marian are married and even though Robin is now in his rightful position he vows to continue to help the oppressed. | |
| Comment: Robin is dubbed "Robin Hood" by his men because of his ability to hit a moving target with his arrows even while hooded and reliant only on the sounds of movement. Lady Marian's introduction into the story involves the somewhat unnecessary seeming complication of the real Marian posing as the maid to another woman who has assumed her identity. | |
| Starring: | Barrie Ingham (as Robin Hood), Peter Blythe (as Sir Roger de Courtenay, Robin's evil cousin), John Arnatt (as Sheriff of Nottingham), Gay Hamilton (as Lady Marian Fitzwarren, [initially fake Marian's maid)]) |
| Featuring: | (Robin's Merry Men) James Hayter (as Friar Tuck), Eric Flynn (as Alan-a-Dale), Reg Lye (as Much), Leon Greene (as Little John), Douglas Mitchell (as Will Scarlett), John Gugolka (as Stephen, Marian's kid brother) John Harvey (as Wallace, Sir Roger's henchman), Arthur Hewlett (as Edwin, castle steward), Jenny Till (as The fake Lady Marian), William Squire (as Sir John de Courtenay, Roger's father, Robin's uncle) |
| Familiar Faces: | Alfie Bass (as Pie Seller), Norman Mitchell (as Pie Seller's dray driver) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the third of three unconnected Robin Hood films made by Hammer. The first was Men of Sherwood Forest (1954) starring Don Taylor as Robin, and the second was Sword of Sherwood Forest (1960) starring Richard Greene. |
| Writer: Charles Wood / Director: Tony Richardson / Producer: Neil Hartley | |
| Type: Historical Drama | Running Time: 119 mins |
| Set in the 1850s. There is unrest in Europe when Imperial Russia seeks to expand its influence and invade Turkey. England's global interests could be threatened by this expansion and so the government is considering coming to the defence of Turkey. Rich aristocratic peers of the realm command England's various regiments because it deemed that they, rather than experienced military campaigners, are the best qualified since it is they who would have the most to lose in land and wealth to a defeat by a conqueror. The 11th Hussars are a cavalry regiment commanded with a pompous verve by Lord Cardigan who glorifies in the spectacle of parading his fine fighting men in their colourful uniforms. He cares not that most of the troopers are from the slums who were duped into enlisting with rose-tinted tales of army life only to discover it is a harsh and thankless existence. Whereas, to most of the ranking officer classes, being in the army is a thrilling and exciting adventure and most are relishing the prospect of actually going to war at last.
Lord Cardigan is an overbearing pedant for the rules of gentlemanly conduct and will not tolerate any officers who do not meet his over-exacting standards. Captain Louis Nolan is an officer who rose through the ranks whilst serving in India and did not buy his position as did so many of his contemporaries. As a result Lord Cardigan distrusts him and singles him out for ill-treatment by repeatedly picking him up on the most trivial infringements of social etiquette in an effort to break him. However, Nolan is not one so easily intimidated and stands up to the bombastic Lord Cardigan with shows of defiance against meaningless exactitudes. Eventually this impertinence infuriates Cardigan so much he has Nolan arrested on a charge of his failure to act a gentleman. Nolan travels to see the war minister Lord Raglan to demand he receive a court martial for his "crimes" so Cardigan's ridiculous behaviour can be exposed. Raglan is aware how pompous Cardigan can be but the most he is willing to do is give Cardigan a mild rebuke and have Nolan transferred to his own staff. War is finally declared and the various regimental commanders are assigned their roles in the upcoming campaign in Ukraine. Lord Raglan nominates himself as the overall expeditionary commander, with Lord Lucan in charge of the cavalry and under him Sir John Scarlett commanding the Heavy Brigade, and Lord Cardigan the Light Brigade. Lords Lucan and Cardigan are brothers-in-law and ardently loathsome of each other and highly rivalrous. After a long sea voyage around the Mediterranean and into the Marmora Sea, the English troops and horses reach the fringes of Sebastopol in Southern Ukraine. The troops are in jubilant bullish spirit as they begin their overland march, but they soon flag under the sweltering heat. Many also succumb to disease as the harsh realities bite. As they reach the River Alma the enemy is spotted spanning a ridge in a militarily superior position. Raglan is not a strategist and relies mostly on conjecture in formulating his plans. He orders an assault on the ridge using infantry soldiers taking tremendous losses but eventually managing to overwhelm the Russians stationed there. This is considered to be a tremendous coup and many believe they have as good as won and they set up a camp. Lucan and Cardigan wear out their men in a petty contest to see who has the neatest camp with the tents in perfect lines forcing the men to take them down and reassemble them countless times. When a Russian defector is captured with information on a planned counterattack, Raglan refuses to take any heed because it is unsportsmanlike to take information from a traitorous spy. Consequently when the attack comes the Russians are able to capture most of the English heavy artillery weaponry. Raglan remains sanguine having faith that they will prevail against any odds because they are the finest soldiers in the world. Captain Nolan impresses upon Raglan the importance of retaking those weapons while still in transit else they will be used to cut off the road to Sebastopol. After a lot of dithering, Raglan agrees to send the Light Brigade cavalry of six hundred men led by Lords Lucan and Cardigan to the mouth of the valley. Raglan observes the situation from the high ridge where he is able to see the deployments of both sides and knows it would be foolhardy to attempt a frontal assault down the main valley. However he sees that were his men to advance quickly along an obscured side valley the Russians could be outflanked and taken by surprise. However when he dictates his orders to be despatched to Lucan and Cardigan he makes his strategic intent so vague that it seems as though he is ordering a full on charge into the main valley. Nolan delivers the orders impressing upon the two lords the importance of immediate action before joining the ranks himself. Lucan and Cardigan puzzle over the orders thinking they go against common sense practises, but assume Raglan must have his reasons. So they order their men to advance and eventually charge the enemy positions head on. The Russians are perfectly placed to oppose the attack and let loose with a continuous barrage of cannon fire cutting swathes through the charging cavalrymen. There is a carnage of men and horses and the few that get through are cut down in close-quarters engagements. When it is over more than two thirds of the Light Brigade are dead and it becomes one of the greatest defeats the English army have ever suffered. Nolan was killed in the fighting but Lucan and Cardigan survive. The recriminations begin immediately with Raglan failing to understand why his orders were flouted in favour of a such a reckless head-on attack. Even when presented with a copy of his woolly-worded orders he refuses to accept any responsibility and blames instead the man who transcribed them whom he contends should have known better what he meant. | |
| Starring: | Trevor Howard (as Lord Cardigan), John Gielgud (as Lord Raglan), Harry Andrews (as Lord Lucan), David Hemmings (as Captain Louis Edward Nolan), Mark Burns (as Capt. William Morris, Nolan's friend), Vanessa Redgrave (as Clarissa Morris, William's wife) |
| Featuring: | Peter Bowles (as Paymaster Capt. Henry Duberly), Jill Bennett (as Mrs Fanny Duberly, paymaster's wife), Leo Britt (as General Sir John Scarlett, in charge of Heavy Brigade), Mark Dignam (as General Airey, Raglan's aide), T.P. McKenna (as William Russell, journalist), Roger Mutton (as Cornet Codrington, Clarissa's brother), Norman Rossington (as T.S.M. Corbett, recruiter) |
| Charlie Bubbles (1967) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Shelagh Delaney / Director: Albert Finney / Producer: Michael Medwin | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 85 mins |
| Charlie Bubbles is a successful writer whose novels have sold millions and been turned into hit movies. He is consequently very rich but finds the financial side of things an immense bore and doesn't enjoy or embrace the opulent lifestyle that his new London based social set relish.
Charlie's roots are up north in Derbyshire where he started from humble beginnings. He is divorced from his wife Lottie who still lives up there with their young son Jack in a farmhouse where she tries to live as self-sufficiently as possible wanting no part of Charlie's immense wealth. All she expects from Charlie is the occasional visit to see Jack and take him out. Charlie is overdue a visit and heads off to see them. He is accompanied by a young American student called Eliza who is a keen fan and does secretarial work for him. She has family in the same area that she is planning on visiting once they arrive. Charlie takes Jack to a football match but his heart is not in it. He does not find his old life any more fulfilling than his new life and seems out of touch and out of place in both - with all his old friends in awe of his success and treating him like a celebrity he is no longer part of their world. He stays the night at Lottie's farmhouse and next morning he sees a hot air balloon in a nearby field - he gets in and takes off and as the film ends we see him floating far off high into the distance. THE END | |
| Comment: The film meanders along without a great deal really happening. Various promising characters are picked up and then dropped from the narrative with no follow-up appearances - and it all ends on a most peculiar note with no real explanation of where the hot air balloon came from or why it was there. | |
| Starring: | Albert Finney (as Charlie Bubbles), Billie Whitelaw (as Lottie Bubbles, Charlie's ex-wife), Liza Minnelli (as Eliza Hayhow, Charlie's student secretary), Colin Blakely (as Smokey Pickles, Charlie's writer friend) |
| Featuring: | Diana Coupland (as Maudie, Smokey's wife), Alan Lake (as RAF Airman hitching lift), Charles Lamb (as Mr Noseworthy, Charlie's butler), Margery Mason (as Mrs Noseworthy, Charlie's cook/housekeeper), John Ronane (as Gerry, Charlie's friend at football match), Timothy Garland (as Jack Bubbles, Charlie's 9-year-old son), Susan Engles (as Nanny to Wendy Padbury's character) |
| Familiar Faces: | Peter Sallis (Charlie's Solicitor), Yootha Joyce (Miriam, Woman in Café, old friend of Charlie's), Wendy Padbury (Girl in Café, Miriam's young teenage daughter, small role, no dialogue) |
| Charlie Muffin (1979) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Keith Waterhouse / Director: Jack Gold / Producers: Norton Knatchbull, Ted Childs | |
| Type: Spy Drama | Running Time: 104 mins |
| Charlie Muffin is an operative working for British intelligence who along with two junior colleagues called Snare and Harrison has just broken a soviet spy chain operating in Britain. This has resulted in the arrest of a top soviet mole called Alexi Berenkov who is handed a forty-year jail sentence for his traitorous activities. The soviet high command are disheartened by this development and decide they need to arrange a prisoner exchange to secure the release of their loyal agent. Unfortunately they don't currently hold anyone of sufficient importance to facilitate such an arrangement.
The director of British security services, Sir Henry Cuthbertson, dislikes Charlie and in the recent operation seemed ready to treat him as an expendable pawn he would sooner be rid of. Only Charlie's own initiative saved him from falling into a deadly trap waiting to be sprung. Charlie's scruffy and independent nature don't adhere to his chief's view of a subordinate's function whereas Snare and Harrison are more his sort - men who obey orders but don't think too much about them. When Charlie makes what Sir Henry views as a glaring mistake he immediately puts him on enforced leave and downgrades him and even when Charlie patiently explains that his apparent "mistake" was a careful strategy which has paid dividends with vital new intelligence, Sir Henry is too stubborn to backtrack on his decision. A top KGB general called Valery Kalenin starts dropping hints that he would like to defect to the west. Sir Henry sends Snare and Harrison to make contact with Kalenin at public events but both men fail their missions and are captured or killed by soviet agents. Sir Henry is forced to recall Charlie to active duty and accept help from the American CIA who want to get involved in the defection of such an important man. Charlie insists on planning the operation himself and not make the same mistakes that his two predecessors did. Charlie makes a successful clandestine contact with Kalenin and reports back that the KGB man does want to defect but also requires half-a-million dollars in cash as an inducement. The money is quickly organised and Charlie arranges with Kalenin a route out of the East with a stopover at a CIA safe house in Prague. Sir Henry and the CIA's London liaison chief Ruttgers insist on being present to oversee matters and wait in the safe house whilst Charlie fetches Kalenin and gives him the money. The plan then involves a CIA man bringing Kalenin to the secret CIA house and Charlie driving elsewhere in a decoy car in case the Russian was followed. When Kalenin arrives at the safe house he reveals that the whole defection has been a ruse and his men now surround the house and the two western security heads are his prisoners who will be released in exchange for Berenkov. Kalenin tells Sir Henry that he really should have had more regard for the skills of Charlie Muffin. A man like that does not take kindly to being used as an expendable pawn or being shunted aside by an unimaginative superior. How can he expect loyalty when he treats his subordinates so shabbily. The defection was a KGB sham to see if it would shake out any agents of sufficient rank to use in exchange but when Charlie Muffin met with him a better plan was put forward. Sir Henry realises that Charlie arranged this whole set-up with Kalenin at their original meeting and orchestrated the whole thing to personally get back at him. And the money that Kalenin apparently demanded was actually "retirement" money for Charlie who has by now vanished without trace with it - and with Charlie's skills it is unlikely he will ever be found wherever in the world he has chosen to go. | |
| Starring: | David Hemmings (as Charlie Muffin), Ian Richardson (as Sir Henry Cuthbertson), Sam Wanamaker (as Ruttgers, CIA's London chief), Pinkas Braun (as Valery Kalenin, KGB general) |
| Featuring: | Clive Revill (as Alexi Berenkov, imprisoned traitor), Jennie Linden (as Edith, Charlie's wife), Donald Churchill (as Wilberforce, Sir Henry's personal assistant), Rohan McCullough (as Janet, Sir Henry's secretary), Christopher Godwin (as Snare, MI6 agent), Tony Mathews (as Harrison, MI6 agent), Shane Rimmer (as Braley, CIA operative) |
| Star-Turns: | Ralph Richardson (as Sir Archibald Willoughby, retired spy, [one scene cameo]) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the novel by Brian Freemantle |
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This was a TV movie made by Euston Films |
| The Cherry Picker (1972) | Previous Next |
| Writer/Director: Peter Curran / Producers: Peter Curran, Derek Kavanagh | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 79 mins |
| James Burn III is an American living in England who has joined a group of hippies promoting a message of peace and love as they stage a lie-in outside Windsor Castle. He's too lazy to get a job so James' father, who is the US Ambassador, hires a brewery worker called Nancy to try and get his son to take a job with a different kind of inducement. She approaches him while he's busking and thinking his luck is in he returns to her place - but she then reveals she is really a market researcher for a brewery. They get talking and when he finds out her father is a rich businessman who runs lots of companies he starts to show some interest in her and when she suggests he take an easy job at the brewery teaching the chairman golf strokes he takes it.
James and Nancy have a relationship and she takes him to see her father, Mr Dobson, who is a kindly old eccentric gent who as a hobby runs pretend businesses making theoretical profits and goods with no actual real end product. He is also an inventor of impractical devices. James and Nancy get married mainly at her insistence because she has now slept with him and he has to. However their whirlwind romance doesn't make for a very firm footing and they row and break up on their honeymoon. James' father offers him $250,000 if he gets back together with her and gives him a grandchild. But that doesn't seem immediately likely and James instead hooks up with his father's young mistress Maureen who lives a comfortable lifestyle on her sugar-daddy's lavish gifts. But she can't cook - so James takes a room with Doris Trulove a pub landlady who can cook but in return requires some special bedroom favours from him. He flits between Maureen and Doris as the fancy takes him for a while and then moves to a windmill to be alone. Eventually he gets back together with Nancy after she tells him she is pregnant and she goes to live with him at the windmill and finally James goes to work with Mr Dobson who has at last had some real business success with a new formula for beer he invented and marketed. | |
| Comment: It's quite a muddled film with a plot that just flits from incident to incident as the fancy takes it with no sense of real consistency or overall plan behind it. Despite the presence of several comedy actors in the cast it is not a comedy. | |
| Starring: | Bob Sherman (as James Burn III), Lulu (as Nancy), Wilfrid Hyde-White (as Dobson, Nancy's father), Fiona Curzon (as Maureen) |
| Featuring: | Robert Hutton (as James' father), Priscilla Morgan (as Rose Trulove), Terry-Thomas, Spike Milligan, Patrick Cargill |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on a novel Pick Up Sticks by Mickey Phillips |
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The running time of the version reviewed was 79 minutes which is considerably less than the 91 minutes seen stated elsewhere - So assuming that is accurate and even allowing for the usual couple of minutes differential caused by NTSC > PAL speed variations, it might mean it was an edited version reviewed here. |
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Fiona Curzon also sings the theme tune |
| Writer: John Briley / Director: Anton M. Leader / Producer: Lawrence P. Bachmann | |
| Type: Sci-Fi | Running Time: 85 mins |
| Tom Llewellyn is a psychologist from London University who is working on the British part of a global United Nations programme to test the IQ of all the world's children. One boy called Paul shows remarkably high intelligence levels completing tests in minutes which normally take hours.
When the results are collated it is discovered that there are five other children around the world that achieved identical test scores. All these children were born of mothers who swear they do not know how they became pregnant. The other five children are all brought to Britain for further testing - but once together the six children run off and hide out in an abandoned church. They exhibit strange powers which enable them to read minds and control other people's actions - even making them kill against their will. The authorities realise what a danger the children are with their uncanny abilities and superior intelligence - and if they cannot be controlled they must be destroyed. Tom requests more time to study them and try to find out what it is they are trying to achieve by grouping together. The children claim not to know what their purpose is. The army surround the church with heavy artillery and mine the sewers with explosives in an effort to persuade the children to give themselves up. The children come out onto the steps but then unexpectedly use the power of their minds to initiate "shoot" instructions which make the troops open fire on them and detonate the bombs - killing all the children. The End. | |
| Comment: It is very unclear why the children effectively seem to commit suicide at the end. If it is somehow part of a plan then its reason or results are not at all adequately depicted or explained. One of the children was shown to be able to come back to life after being killed but if this is their plan it is not obvious. The film ends with us looking at an electronic device the children constructed in the church although its purpose or function is not explained but one supposes it has some significance. | |
| Starring: | Ian Hendry (as Tom Llewellyn), Alan Badel (as Dr David Neville, Tom's colleague), Barbara Ferris (as Susan Eliot, Paul's young aunt) |
| Featuring: | Alfred Burke (as Colin Webster, Government agent), Sheila Allen (as Diana Looran, Paul's mother), Patrick Wymark (as Military Commander), Clive Powell (as Paul, the main child) |
| NOTES: | |
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Made in Black and White |
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A sequel to the novel The Midwich Cuckoos by John Wyndham |
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This film is a follow-up to Village of the Damned (1960). However none of the cast (or characters) are the same and no reference is made to any of the events in the first film. |
| China 9 Liberty 37 (1978) | Previous Next |
| Writers: Jerry Harvey, Douglas Venturelli / Director/Producer: Monte Hellman / Producers: Gianni Bozzacchi, Valerio De Paolis | |
| Type: European / Western | Running Time: 98 mins |
| In the American wild west of the 1860s a captured Mexican gunman called Clayton Drumm is awaiting execution by hanging. But he receives a last minute reprieve from the governor on behest of some interested parties and is given an amnesty for any past crimes. His benefactors are the Great Southern Railroad who want to employ his services to rid themselves of a landowner called Matthew Sebenek whose refusal to sell his land is halting the progress of their expansion.
Drumm is not a cold-hearted killer but is prepared to do what he must and travels to the remote Sebenek homestead where he meets Matthew and his young wife Catherine under guise of being a traveller seeking some rest. But Matthew is an ex-railroad man himself and knows to expect an attempt on his life from the ruthless company and he tacitly understands Drumm's purpose and confiscates his weaponry before allowing his to stay for a few days. Drumm spends a couple of days in the company of Matthew and his attractive wife and meets his family of close-knit brothers when they pay a visit and Drumm realises he is not prepared to kill this decent man for the railroad company's convenience and decides to move on. Catherine loves her older husband but finds the young virile stranger fascinatingly attractive and on the morning of Drumm's departure they have a passionate encounter while bathing in the nearby stream. Drumm then departs and Catherine returns home but when Matthew sees her muddy night-dress he guesses what has just happened and becomes violent, smacking her around in his fury at her infidelity. In desperate self-defence she grabs a kitchen knife and stabs him and he collapses - and believing him dead she immediately rides off to catch up with Drumm. She tells him what happened and asks to accompany him to the town of Liberty where she can take a stagecoach. But back at the homestead Matthew is not dead and recovers from his injury and swiftly organises his brothers into a posse to hunt down and kill Drumm and bring back his treacherous wife. Catherine and Drumm become friendlier on their journey and stopping over at a hotel on their way they become proper lovers. Catherine decides she wants to stay with Drumm and urges him to settle down telling him she could make him happy. Matthew and his brothers eventually track down their quarry and a shoot-out ensues. However Drumm's fearsome reputation as a sharpshooter is not for nothing and most of the brothers get killed, but in the mêlée Matthew manages to recapture his wife and immediately heads back with her to their home. Drumm receives a flesh-wound in the shooting but after he has tended to that he rides off after them. But back at the homestead a gang of hired killers are laying in wait eager to do the railroad's bidding and Matthew and Catherine get pinned down under fire on a ridge, outgunned and outnumbered. Then Drumm arrives and he fights alongside them evening the odds with his skills and together they kill all the gunmen. Matthew is obliged to him for his assistance but still insists that honour is satisfied as they stand and face one another. Matthew draws first but Drumm shoots the gun from his hand and the matter is put to rest with no further bloodshed. Matthew allows Catherine freedom to choose and she decides to stay with him realising that Drumm is never going to settle down. Drumm departs - and Matthew and Catherine decide the time has come for them to move on and they abandon their land to the railroad's relentless tide of progress. | |
| Starring: | Warren Oates (as Matthew Sebanek), Fabio Testi (as Clayton Drumm), Jenny Agutter (as Catherine Sebanek, Matthew's wife) |
| Featuring: | Gianrico Tondinelli, Franco Interlenghi, Carlos Bravo, Paco Benlloch, Isabel Mestres (as Matthew's relations), Sam Peckinpah (as Wilbur Olsen, a writer) |
| Starlets: | Natalia Kim (as Cassie, brothel Madame), Yvonne Sentis (as a Prostitute) |
| NOTES: | |
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This Spanish/Italian produced Spaghetti western is reviewed here because of the involvement of Jenny Agutter in the cast. |
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The title of the film comes from a signpost seen at the start of the movie which shows the distances to the two nearest towns:- China being 9 miles in one direction and Liberty 37 miles in the other. |
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Sam Peckinpah receives an "introducing" credit. His brief and minor role is that of a dime-store novelist at Liberty who wants to write some sensationalised accounts of Drumm's exploits and offers Catherine vast amounts of money to tell all (which she declines to do). |
| Circus of Horrors (1960) | Previous Next |
| Writer: George Baxt / Director: Sidney Hayers / Producers: Julian Wintle, Leslie Parkyn | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 88 mins |
| In an extended prologue. It is England in 1947 and a coolly efficient German plastic surgeon called Doctor Rossiter is using his own experimental techniques that are not condoned by the proper medical authorities and so he works at the fringes of the law for desperate people. Unfortunately his latest patient Evelyn Morley has removed her bandages too soon and been left with horrendous facial scarring. Fearing arrest Rossiter flees to France with his two assistants, brother and sister Martin and Angela. Just prior to this Rossiter suffered a car crash and required some facial reconstruction of his own which Martin performed under Rossiter's guidance and with his new appearance Rossiter decides to change his name to Schuler (and henceforth this is how he will be referred to in this summary).
While searching for a place to stay in France the three fugitives ask directions from a young child called Nicole Vanet who has some facial scarring suffered during wartime bombing. Nicole's father is the owner of a run down circus and Schuler offers to fix Nicole's scarring in return for a place to stay. The operation is a complete success and Mr Vanet is delighted. Schuler strikes a deal with him that if Vanet lets him run the circus he will turn it around and make it a big success. They sign a contract but shortly afterwards Vanet dies and Schuler becomes the de facto owner and adopts young Nicole. In town Schuler sees a scarred prostitute called Elissa and offers to fix her looks if she will come and train and work at the circus. He proceeds to build up an array of acts in this same way with performers who need to hide away after he has operated on them. End of prologue. It is now ten years later and Schuler's Circus is currently in Berlin. It has become a successful crowd-pleasing attraction although behind the scenes there are some jealousies involved among the acts concerning who should have star billings. Elissa has become a high rope performer but feels slighted that newcomer Magda is given top billing with her equestrian act. Schuler has had affairs with most of his female performers after making them beautiful but now Magda wants to leave the circus. This is something that Schuler cannot allow for he is concerned that his continued medical practices might be exposed. With Martin's grudging assistance Schuler arranges an "accident" and Magda dies while performing an act. Her death is just one of a series that have plagued the circus and caused it to be dubbed the "Jinx Circus" because so many performers have tragically died - but police investigations have been unable to prove they were anything other than unfortunate accidents. When the circus moves to England, Scotland Yard decide to send Inspector Ames in undercover as a crime reporter as a precaution to see if there is anything fishy going on. Ames calls himself Arthur Desmond and gets to know some of the beautiful female performers, some quite intimately, and notices they all have barely noticeable remnants of facial scarring. This includes the now grown-up Nicole who fills him in on the early days of the circus when Schuler first arrived. Former accident victims are exhumed and it is discovered that they all show signs of having had plastic surgery. Desmond recalls the case of Dr Rossiter ten years beforehand and wonders if there could be a link. He contacts Evelyn Morley and asks her to come along to try and identify Schuler as Rossiter. Evelyn recognises Schuler's ring and knows it is him but keeps the information to herself as she broods on it. Meanwhile another performer is wanting to leave and Schuler has to arrange another accident. Things are quickly going wrong and when even Martin and Angela want to leave having had enough of all the deaths, Schuler realises that events are building towards his inevitable exposure. He tries to get away but Desmond is after him and they fight - Schuler is wounded by a circus animal before being run down and killed by a vengeful Evelyn returning in a maddened state. | |
| Starring: | Anton Diffring (as Dr Rossiter/Schuler), Kenneth Griffith (as Martin, Schuler's assistant), Jane Hylton (as Angela, Martin's sister), Conrad Phillips (as Inspector Ames/Arthur Desmond), Erika Remberg (as Elissa Caro, circus performer), Yvonne Monlaur (as Nicole Vanet, as an adult) |
| Featuring: | Jack Gwillim (as Superintendent Andrews, Ames' boss), Vanda Hudson (as Magda, circus performer), Yvonne Romain (as Melina, circus performer), Carla Challoner (as Nicole, as a child), Colette Wilde (as Evelyn Morley, first patient) |
| Star-Turns: | Donald Pleasence (as Vanet, Nicole's father) |
| The City of the Dead (1960) | Previous Next |
| aka: Horror Hotel | |
| Writer: George Baxt / Director: John Moxey / Producer: Donald Taylor | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 76 mins |
| Set in Modern day America (1960). Professor Alan Driscoll is a college professor giving a class on 17th century witchcraft in New England to his small group of students. He tells them about (and we see on-screen) a witch called Elizabeth Selwyn from the small town of Whitewood, Massachusetts. In 1692 she was burnt at the stake by the fearful townsfolk while her secret consort Jethrow Keane watches unable to do anything to help her except mouth a quiet plea to Lucifer to save her. For years afterwards young village women were found slain and witnesses swore they had seen the dead witch Elizabeth Selwyn in the vicinity.
One of Professor Driscoll's students called Nan Barlow is keen to do more research on witchcraft for her term paper and she asks the Professor if he can recommend a suitable old town where she can soak up the atmosphere and explore dusty archives. Driscoll suggests she go to Whitewood itself as it hasn’t changed much over the years. Nan heads off alone to stay for a few nights at the town's local hotel called The Raven's Inn. The small foggy town appears very spooky and the buildings are centuries old. The hotel owner is a woman called Mrs Newless who appears unwilling to accommodate Nan until she learns that Professor Driscoll sent her. Nan is given a ground floor room and seems to be the only guest although Mrs Newless claims they are almost full. We later see Mrs Newless and a mysterious man discussing Nan's suitability for the following night's anniversary occasion (They are the same actors who played Elizabeth Selwyn and Jethrow Keane in the 17th century prologue scene). Nan goes for an evening walk and finds it disconcerting that all the townspeople she passes seem to stop and look at her strangely. She visits the old church but the old blind vicar called Reverend Russell won't let her in and warns her to leave town. She visits a local antiquarian bookshop and is relieved to find someone who seems normal - the shop is minded by young Patricia Russell, the vicar's granddaughter, who moved here three weeks ago to run the shop following her grandmother's death. Nan borrows a book about witchcraft and goes back to her room to study. Nan is most interested to read about the events of Candlemas Eve in 1692 when a coven of witches lured a young girl down to their lair to sacrifice her at a black mass in honour of Lucifer. Candlemas Eve is February 1st which happens to be tomorrow night. The next night Nan hears strange chanting coming from below her room. Underneath a rug she finds a trap door and is intrigued so she opens it up and finds some stairs to a tunnel. She is suddenly captured by two men in ceremonial robes and dragged towards an altar where Mrs Newless is waiting. They are a coven of witches and Mrs Newless identifies herself as Elizabeth Selwyn - and as Nan is held down screaming helplessly in terror the witch kills her with a dagger. Two weeks pass and back at home Nan's boyfriend Bill and her brother Richard are beginning to become concerned. They had assumed Nan was too engrossed in her studies to write or phone but when they contact the town's local police to check up on her they are told that she left after just one night in the town. Richard is a science professor and he discusses the location with his colleague Professor Driscoll. The Professor says he suggested she go to Whitewood because he himself was born in that town and knows it well. Richard and Bill, travelling separately, decide to go to Whitewood to trace Nan's movements. Bill trails behind and has a car accident and is delayed. Up ahead and unaware of Bill's difficulties, Richard reaches town and meets with Patricia who tells him about meeting Nan and finding it strange she left so suddenly. Patricia introduces him to her grandfather the vicar who is very fearful. He says he is fighting a losing battle against the evil that pervades this town - the inhabitants have all been corrupted by evil and have a pact with Lucifer to live eternal lives in return for the ceremonial sacrifice of a young girl on two proximate dates each year. The first was Candlemas Eve two weeks ago and the second is The Witches Sabbath which is tonight. Later on Patricia is abducted and the fearful frail vicar tells Richard that the witches have selected her for their sacrifice. He tells Richard the only way to destroy them is to bathe them in the moonlight shadow from a holy cross. Richard locates the same trapdoor in the hotel that Nan found and discovers the coven in session holding Patricia captive - but he is overpowered. Then a newcomer arrives - it is Professor Driscoll himself - a high-ranking member of the coven. The captives are taken out into the moonlit graveyard where the sacrifice is to take place when the clock strikes thirteen. Patricia is held down on an altar and they wait for the appointed moment. Bill then staggers into the situation still injured from his car crash - Richard shouts out to him about using a cross. Elizabeth Selwyn tries to stop Bill by throwing the ceremonial dagger into his back - but although mortally injured Bill manages to heave a large headstone cross into the air and as its shadow touches the witches they are all engulfed in flames and destroyed. Bill dies of his injury but Patricia and Richard survive. | |
| Comment: It is possibly unclear from the above summary how early on Nan's death occurs in the film. But like as happened in the same year's Psycho she is built up as the film's heroine and her death occurs unexpectedly about halfway through - clearing the way for the seemingly supporting characters to then take centre stage and investigate what happened to her. | |
| Starring: | Venetia Stevenson (as Nan Barlow), Dennis Lotis (as Richard Barlow, Nan's brother), Patricia Jessel (as Elizabeth Selwyn/Mrs Newless, witch and hotel owner), Christopher Lee (as Professor Alan Driscoll), Betta St. John (as Patricia Russell, reverend's granddaughter), Tom Naylor (as Bill Maitland, Nan's boyfriend) |
| Featuring: | Valentine Dyall (as Jethrow Keane, Elizabeth Selwyn's consort), Norman Macowan (as Reverend Russell), Ann Beach (as Lottie, mute servant girl at hotel), Maxine Holden (as Sue, Nan's cousin) |
| NOTES: | |
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Story by Milton Subotsky |
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Made in Black and White |
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Venetia Stevenson receives an "introducing" credit. Her surname is spelt "Stephenson" in the opening credits and "Stevenson" in the closing credits. The character played by Tom Naylor is called "Bill Maitland" in the dialogue but shown as "Tom Maitland" in the end credits. |
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Although set in the United States this film is reviewed here because it was made in the UK and starred Christopher Lee (although he was playing his role with an American accent). It was the first film made by the UK production company that would become known as "Amicus". |
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The version reviewed carried the title Horror Hotel. This was the US name for the film and is probably more appropriate since City of The Dead does seem somewhat overblown a title. |
| Writers: Charles Bennett, Louis M. Heyward / Director: Jacques Tourneur / Producer: George Willoughby | |
| Type: Adventure | Running Time: 80 mins |
| Set in the Cornish coastal town of Tregathian in 1903. Local legends tell of an ancient city called Lyonesse that was swallowed by rising waters and now lies underwater some way out to sea. Some fishermen claim to hear the city bells still tolling from underwater.
When the body of a lawyer is washed up on the beach, mining engineer Ben Harris is sent to the clifftop hotel to deliver the bad news to the young heiress owner Jill Tregillis for whom the lawyer had been working on issues to do with some nearby mineworkings. Jill and Ben are both Americans and are becoming good friends. Ben is introduced to a resident guest called Harold Tufnell-Jones who tells him that various textbooks have gone missing from his room recently including one in which he had placed a sketch he had drawn of Jill. Ben decides to stay overnight to keep a watch in case Jill is in any danger. Later on in the dark he fights off an intruder who in the gloom seems to have scaly skin and an inhuman look - the intruder mysteriously escapes leaving only a perplexing trail of seaweed. Later that evening there is another intrusion and this time Jill is abducted. Ben and Harold find a secret passageway leading from the hotel carved into the rocks and decide to follow. The passage leads to a large cavern and after accidentally falling into a plunge pool and being drawn by a strong current underwater they come out in a chamber that appears to be part of an ancient city with architecture resembling that of Babylonia. The two men search around looking for Jill and are eventually captured by ruffians under the command of a man called Sir Hugh. He is very self-assured and rules with an icy determination. He reveals that he has been sending his followers on surface raids to gather books that might help him solve a looming crisis. The city is situated beside an active volcano that has been steadily building in pressure over the past few decades and is expected to erupt soon. The volcano provides the city with its vital life sustaining heating but may soon become its destroyer so Sir Hugh is seeking a way to tame it so it does not erupt. He had been hoping the surface men's emerging science knowledge might have held the answer. Sir Hugh then reveals that he and his men have been here for 100 years since 1803! They were smugglers and in a bid to escape the authorities they fled down the tunnels and accidentally found themselves here in this city. With no way to leave they stayed for many years until they realised they were not aging because of some unique properties of air imbalance and the presence of the volcano. Eventually a way back was found but it was soon discovered that exposure to sunlight resulted in instant death from the ultraviolet rays and so they were effectively trapped down here forever. Some of the original inhabitants of Lyonesse had survived when the city first sank beneath the waves in ancient times and these people have evolved into Gillmen who can breath underwater and have scaly seaweed strewn skin. These creatures obey the commands of Sir Hugh and it is they whom he despatched to the surface to raid for science books. When one of those books contained a drawing of Jill, Sir Hugh ordered her abduction because she resembles his late wife and he wishes her to become his eternal companion. The only concession Sir Hugh must make to keep the Gillmen obedient is to make occasional human sacrifices to the Gillmen's volcano god for which he abducts surface dwellers. The ancient bells toll to signal this event and the recent dead lawyer had been such a victim and Ben and Harold realise they will probably be next for this fate. Ben claims to be a volcanologist so Sir Hugh lets him and Harold live so that they can work on a solution to saving the city from the danger of the volcano. But instead the two men work together to rescue Jill and find a way out. Once Jill is back with them they are helped by an old reverend who also accidentally found his way down here although he finds his eternal life a curse. He tells them how they can escape using diving equipment that the smugglers have - the air imbalances will not have affected the newcomers yet so they can safely return to the surface. The heroes flee underwater in bulky diving gear chased by Sir Hugh and his men and the Gillmen determined not to let them get away. After a protracted chase the three surface dwellers eventually make it back to dry land. They only just make it in time because shortly afterwards the seascape explodes as the volcano finally erupts and obliterates the city. | |
| Starring: | Vincent Price (as Sir Hugh, ruler of the undersea city), Tab Hunter (as Ben Harris), David Tomlinson (as Harold Tufnell-Jones), Susan Hart (as Jill Tregillis) |
| Featuring: | John Le Mesurier (as Reverend Jonathan Ives) |
| Familiar Faces: | Tony Selby (one of Sir Hugh's men, [Cameo]) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on City in the Sea by Edgar Allan Poe. Additional dialogue by David Whittaker |
| Clash of the Titans (1981) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Beverley Cross / Director: Desmond Davis / Producers: Charles H. Schneer, Ray Harryhausen | |
| Type: Fantasy Adventure | Running Time: 112 mins |
| Set in the mythical past. Perseus is a young man living on a peaceful island unaware that he has an extraordinary heritage... His mother had been a Greek princess who had been so beautiful that her father the king had kept her locked away to prevent her purity being corrupted. But despite these precautions she became with-child and had a son. The king viewed this as unpardonable treachery and cast Princess Danae and her baby son adrift at sea in a sealed casket to let the harsh ocean currents decide her fate. Unfortunately for the king and his whole kingdom, Danae's secret lover had been the god Zeus in disguise who had used his divine abilities to bypass the locked doors. Zeus is the ruler of the Greek Gods of Mount Olympus and is so angered by the king's barbaric sentence upon his cherished lover and his mortal son Perseus, that he orders the king's land to be lain waste by the giant sea-Titan Kraken; and ensures that the seaborne casket bearing his lover and son is carried by the currents to a new safe haven. In his new home Perseus became a fine and athletic young man.
In the halls of Mount Olympus the goddess Thetis becomes incensed by Zeus' arrogant dictatorial rule. Her ire emanates because Zeus punished her mortal son Calibos by transforming him into a monstrous demon for the crime of callously hunting and killing a sacred herd of winged horses. Calibos became condemned to live in the swamps with the other hordes of unspeakable creatures although his predominant leadership abilities soon saw him become a self-styled Lord of the Marshes. In an effort to challenge Zeus' supremacy Thetis decides to use Zeus' son Perseus as a pawn in a game that will ultimately pit him against her son Calibos. She transports Perseus to the outskirts of Joppa where the challenge is about to unfold. Zeus' pride prevents him from declining the challenge but he insists upon gifting Perseus with god-forged tools and weapons to help him on his forthcoming quest. Perseus meets a wise old man called Ammon who advises him on the perils ahead. Perseus then travels into Joppa and learns that beautiful princess Andromeda is stricken by a curse that causes her to suffer debilitating nightmarish visions every night. Perseus discovers that her dream essence is being nocturnally abducted by a giant vulture. Perseus tames Pegasus, the last of the winged horses, and follows the vulture to the swamps where Andromeda's essence is held prisoner by Calibos. The evil despot was once Andromeda's intended but now is too vile in appearance for her to marry - but he still likes to gaze upon her beauty and imposes a curse to ensure that she marries no other. He sets her a nightly insoluble riddle whose solution by any suitor would free her - but if the suitor fails he condemns himself to death meaning that very few men dare try. Perseus, hidden by invisibility, learns the solution for the current riddle and next day offers himself as the prospective suitor and solves the puzzle freeing Andromeda from the curse. A wedding date is set. Goddess Thetis is outraged by this trickerroneous defeat and decrees that Andromeda must be sacrificed in thirty days else the Kraken will be released to lay waste to Joppa. The Kraken is an immense sea creature of unbeatable power which no man can kill. Perseus is determined to find a way and travels to consult the evil Stygian Witches and through cunning manages to discover the one means by which the Kraken can be killed - with the gaze of a Gorgon. The Gorgon called Medusa is a hideous reptilian woman-creature with snakes for hair and any living being that looks directly at her face will turn to stone - whether she be living or dead. Perseus and a party of brave warriors travel to the Gorgon's lair on the Isle of the Dead. Perseus manages to slay the evil creature by only looking at her via his reflective shield. He beheads Medusa and begins the long journey back to Joppa with the deadly head safely wrapped in his cape. Calibos is dogging his tracks and makes an attempt to stop him. They have a fight to the death which Perseus wins. With time short Perseus hurries back to Joppa on Pegasus. The godly deadline has passed and the Queen has no choice but to ready her daughter Andromeda for sacrifice to prevent the Kraken destroying the city - Andromeda is ready to reluctantly accept her fate for the sake of the people. As the Kraken rises from the sea to take Andromeda, Perseus arrives and displays the Gorgon's head which turns the Kraken into stone. The Titan crumbles under its own petrified weight and is destroyed. With the Princess and the kingdom saved the marriage goes ahead. And in Mount Olympus, Zeus is proudly pleased that his brave and courageous son has proved triumphant. | |
| Starring: | (Mortals) Harry Hamlin (as Perseus), Judi Bowker (as Andromeda), Burgess Meredith (as Ammon), Neil McCarthy (as Calibos, lord of the marsh) (Immortals) Laurence Olivier (as Zeus), Claire Bloom (as goddess Hera, wife of Zeus), Maggie Smith (as goddess Thetis, mother of Calibos) |
| Featuring: | Siân Phillips (as Queen Cassiopeia, Andromeda's mother), Tim Pigott-Smith (as Thallo, gladiator), Susan Fleetwood (as goddess Athena), Flora Robson, Anna Manahan and Freda Jackson (as Stygian Witches), Donald Houston (as King Acrisius, Danae's father [prologue only]) |
| Familiar Faces: | Ursula Andress (as goddess Aphrodite, [cameo role only]) |
| Starlets: | Vida Taylor (as Princess Danae, mother of Perseus) |
| aka: Harry and the Hookers | |
| Writer: Lewis John Hagleton / Director: Lindsay Shonteff / Producer: Lewis J. Force | |
| Type: Crime Drama | Running Time: 83 mins |
| Harry Clegg is a womanising Private Investigator who is quite prepared to kill to get himself out of scrapes. Currently his work has all but dried up and he is willing to take on any sort of job to earn a bit of money.
Clegg is hired by a wealthy businessman called Lord Cruikshank who has received a death threat. There is only one person Cruikshank can think of that might wish to kill him. That man is Frank Gastrow who received a twenty-year jail sentence for embezzling several hundred thousand pounds from a finance company that Cruikshank used to run with three associates:- Sir Adrian Ashley, Joseph Valentine and Colonel Sullivan - that was exactly twenty years ago. Clegg agrees a daily fee and begins investigating. Unfortunately the only lead comes to a dead end because Clegg finds out that Gastrow died in prison twelve years ago. In the meantime one of the other former associates, Sir Adrian Ashley, is murdered and a few days later Lord Cruikshank too becomes a victim. It is clear that someone has a vendetta against the four former associates and even worse for Clegg - he was never paid! So Clegg decides to approach the other associates hoping they will hire him to continue investigating. Firstly he tries Joseph Valentine who agrees but he too is soon murdered and once again Clegg is never paid. The final associate is Colonel Sullivan whom Clegg has to track down because he has gone into petrified hiding. He agrees to hire Clegg for a huge daily fee to keep him safe. Sullivan confesses to Clegg that he and his three associates were the real embezzlers and they had set Frank Gastrow up to take the fall. So Clegg figures that it must be someone linked to Gastrow who holds a well-founded grudge although he cannot understand why they would have waited so long to act. Eventually Clegg discovers that Gastrow had had an illegitimate son through a prostitute who has changed his name to Francis Wildman and has since become a rich and successful Fashion House owner. Clegg is sent by Sullivan to try and arrange a pay-off - but Wildman has become a malicious character who is only interested in seeking revenge for his wrongfully imprisoned father. Wildman says he waited this long because he wanted the four men to build empires with their ill-gotten gains and feel safe and secure before he took his festering retribution - and he is fairly easy about who else he kills in order to achieve it - including Clegg who only manages to escape the maniacal son's clutches with his life by fighting his way out. Later Clegg and Sullivan receive an anonymous phone call promising incriminating evidence against Wildman. But it is a trap and when they reach the rendezvous point Wildman and his thugs are waiting. Wildman says he'll let Clegg go if he gives Sullivan up - and Clegg, with no loyalty to anyone but himself, does so. Wildman has no mercy and shoots Sullivan dead - but then he goes back on his word and orders Clegg shot as well and Clegg has to fire back and kills all the thugs and Wildman. Clegg's fee still has not been paid because his clients keep being killed so he rifles through Sullivan's pockets and takes what is owing to him. | |
| Starring: | Gilbert Wynne (as Harry Clegg, private eye), Gary Hope (as Francis Wildman, owner of Starlight Fashion House) |
| Featuring: | Norman Claridge (as Lord Cruikshank, first client), Noel Davis (as Charles Victor, Manager of Starlight Fashion House), Michael Nightingale (as Colonel Sullivan, Lord Cruikshank's associate), A.J. Brown (as Joseph Valentine, Lord Cruikshank's associate), Ronald Leigh Hunt (as Inspector Kert, flying squad), Margery Mason (as Neighbour) |
| Starlets: | Gilly Grant (as Suzy the Slag, blue film queen), Heather Downham (as Starlight Fashions Receptionist), Carmen Dene (as Clegg's Girl), Valerie Shelton (as Clegg's Girl), Jenny Robbins (as Shirley Jones, Clegg's policewoman friend), Jo Jeggo (as Clegg's nude girlfriend) Susan Wellington, Laura Beaumont, Hannah Leek, Susan Babbage, Felicity Leach (as Lollipop licking girls at Wildman's mansion) |
| NOTES: | |
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Gilbert Wynne receives an "introducing" credit |
| Clinic Exclusive (1971) | Previous Next |
| aka: With These Hands...; Clinic Xclusive | |
| Writer/Producer: Elton Hawke / Director: Don Chaffey | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 86 mins |
| Julie Mason is an alluring young woman who owns and runs her own health clinic where she offers massage treatment to a rich clientele. For an additional payment she is always willing to provide some extra personal services during the treatment to satisfy a clients' more base urges. But Julie does not stop there - she exploits some of her clients' growing emotional attachment to her and the service she provides by hinting that the clinic is in dire financial straights and might be forced to close down if she does not come by some cash quickly - and many of her more vulnerable clients give her large donations rather than see that happen. But in reality the business is doing fine and Julie does not put their money back into the business but is instead squirreling it away for herself.
Julie has no emotional attachment to the people she exploits and if they cease to be of any use to her she loses all interest in them. One such client is Elsa Farson, an older woman who has fallen in love with Julie and has enjoyed the erotic pleasures that Julie has provided for her during treatment sessions and has believed their love to be a two-way thing. Elsa has been a good source of income for Julie but when the woman's finances become exhausted and she can no longer even pay the clinic's normal fees Julie turns cold and detached on her. Elsa is visibly distressed by this rejection and keeps trying to contact her as Julie strives to avoid her and describes her as a neurotic woman to her secretary Ann who knows nothing of Julie's secret financial arrangements and cannot understand why her normally pleasant boss is taking such a hard-line attitude to this particular client. Meanwhile Julie has used her sexual wiles to manipulate an estate agent into letting her use an empty mansion he has on his books to hold a grand party to drum up new business for her clinic. There she meets a man called Lee Maitland who knows the mansion's current owner but promises not tell on her if she spends some time talking with him. He is a rich businessman and Julie is always attuned to the possibility of grooming a new "investor". But Lee is different - he is calm and collected and not interested in treatment and Julie becomes intrigued by him. They fall in love and start a romance which for Julie is completely genuine for once in her life. As their trust in each other grows Lee tells her about a massive business deal he's working on and she tells him about some of the "tricks" she uses on her clients. After a two week whirlwind romance Lee proposes marriage and Julie amazes herself by accepting. They make plans to get married soon after Lee has completed his business deal. Around this time Elsa Farson commits suicide while in a state of severe depression at not being able to get hold of Julie. Ann wonders how Julie can live with herself having the woman's death on her conscience although Julie is not bothered. She does become concerned when Lee doesn't contact her for several days afterwards but is then relieved when he sends her flowers saying he had urgent business matters to deal with. When he next sees her Lee is upset - he tells her his big deal is on the verge of collapsing - he had borrowed the money from his company's accounts with the intention of quietly paying it back out of the profits once the successful deal had been completed - but he has had advanced word that the auditors are coming in and he has had to pay it back early to avoid being found out and now has insufficient funds to finance his deal. Julie tells him that is not a problem because she has saved up a lot of money and she will also sell her property and liquidate her business and he can use that - she has complete trust in him and security in the knowledge that they will soon be husband and wife. They go to a seaside hotel and she hands over the money she has raised (which is everything she has ever worked for in cash form) and he takes it with the promise that he will be back later. When he returns he tells her everything is now sorted and makes a great play about making out his will in her favour should anything befall him. He leaves the next morning and tragic news soon comes through that his car has plunged over the cliff into the sea and he is dead although his body is not yet recovered. Julie is devastated at his loss and cries her eyes out. Then Lee calls her on the hotel phone. He is still alive but the news is not good for her - he tells her his name is not really Lee Maitland and she will never find him - if she tries then the police might suspect she was somehow involved in the car crash to benefit from the newly drawn up will and her various blackmail scams will also be uncovered. He tells he has ruined her on behalf of someone he loves so she too will know what it is like to lose everything. (And although he doesn't tell Julie this detail, WE see that Lee is holding a photograph of his mother - Elsa Farson). We leave Julie contemplating the loss of her money, business and her thought-to-be lover as she stares out to sea from a cliff-top. | |
| Comment: Although it might seem towards the end that the scam is Lee's revenge for his mother's death, it is actually the extortion of money that initially prompted his strategy because Lee's first contacts with Julie are long before Elsa committed suicide. Also we see that Lee does not financially gain from his scam and uses the money he took from Julie to pay for a sick man's medical treatments in return for the use of his identity on the will. Although the viewer knows a while before Julie that Lee is conning her in some way, it is not until the end that we discover he was Elsa's son. | |
| Starring: | Georgina Ward (as Julie Mason), Alex Davion (as Lee Maitland), Polly Adams (as Ann, Julie's PA), Carmen Silvera (as Elsa Farson, clinic client obsessed with Julie), Mike Lewin (as Roger Dawes, Ann's boyfriend) |
| Featuring: | Peter Halliday (as Mr Fawcett, hotel manager), Basil Moss (as Philip Eveleigh, clinic client charged with embezzlement), Windsor Davies (as Geoffrey Carter, unwell man), Geoffrey Morris (as Sir Roderick Clyde, clinic client), Vincent Ball (as Bernard Wilcox MP, clinic client) |
| Starlets: | April Olrich (as Paula, party guest - cameo), Maria Coyne (as Marilyn, clinic staff), Pearl Hawkes (as Josie, Maid at hotel), Nicola Austin (as Girl in Pool at party, uncredited extra), Paula Wright? (as Patient, uncredited extra)* |
| NOTES: | |
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The version reviewed carried the American title of With These Hands ... |
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*Paula Wright was in Virgin Witch (1972) in a small credited role as a housekeeper - and (based purely on recognition) a very similar looking woman appears here as an uncredited extra in an opening tracking shot establishing the activities of the clinic by showing a series of patients being treated. |
| A Clockwork Orange (1971) | Previous Next |
| Novel: Anthony Burgess / Writer/Director/Producer: Stanley Kubrick | |
| Type: Fantasy Drama | Running Time: 136 mins |
| It is sometime in the not too distant future and gangs of young male youths nightly terrorise the citizens with their bullying and vicious anti-social activities. Alex de Large is the leader of one such gang. His gang hang around in the local milk bar each night and then go out to see what fun they can have causing "ultra-violence". We see them beating up an old tramp and then having a fight with a rival gang. Later they head off to a remote house to make a surprise visit - gaining access to the randomly selected home of Mr Alexander and his wife using a tried and trusted ruse of needing to use their phone to report an accident. They beat up Mr Alexander and rape his wife - all whilst Alex is singing a happy tune.
Alex lives at home with his parents who are both a bit timid and somewhat scared of him - he spends the day sleeping so he is ready for the evening's activities. One of his passions is the music of Ludvig Van Beethoven and the other is a bit of the old "In-Out" with girls. When he next meets up with his gang they are in a rebellious mood and are frustrated at Alex's lack of ambition in taking them on larger more rewarding jobs. Alex manages to re-exert his authority but to appease them he goes along with their suggestion to rob the house of a rich lone woman - unfortunately Alex accidentally kills the woman while being too rough to keep her quiet. His gang rebel and knock him senseless and he is picked up by the police and found guilty of murder and sent to prison for 14 years. In prison Alex becomes a model inmate and helps the prison chaplain with his bible classes. Two years into his sentence he hears of a new treatment that is being proposed to cure prisoners and allow them to be released early. When a government minister tours the prison looking for a suitable candidate Alex puts himself forward and is selected. The Minister of the Interior is looking to introduce his new policy to tackle crime and bring down the prison population to make way for the expected rise in political offenders that will need to be accommodated. Policy decisions have decreed that actual criminal behaviour is better treated using curative methods to allay the criminal reflex rather than incarceration that just puts the criminal in an environment where he can become ever more hardened - and this trial run will be a proving ground for full implementation of the procedure in a years time. The treatment involves the use of a new experimental drug combined with the forced watching of images of extreme violence designed to induce a feeling of suicidal sickness in the subject whenever confronted with thoughts of violence - so that the subject will moderate their behaviour to quell that feeling and become a good citizen. Alex is willing to try anything to be released early but what he is most displeased about is the incidental music chosen to accompany the film clips he is forced to watch - namely the music of Beethoven's 9th symphony which gives him an unintended aversion to his favourite music as well. At the end of the treatment there is a successful test showing that Alex now feels cripplingly nauseous when subjected to violence or sexual temptation and he is deemed cured and released back into society. He goes back home but his parents have let his room and he is made to feel unwelcome for the shame he has brought upon them. So he wanders the streets aimlessly and gets accosted by the same tramp he and his gang beat up at the start of the film - but he is unable to fight back - he is saved by two policemen who turn out to be members of his gang who have joined the force under a new government policy of recruiting brutal thugs into the police - they are still vengeful towards him and take him to a remote countryside location where they beat him up and then leave him. Nauseous and in pain he somehow makes his way in the pouring rain to a remote house seeking assistance. This turns out to be the house of Mr Alexander who is now in a wheelchair following the attack upon him two years ago by Alex's masked gang. His wife died soon after her rape ordeal and he now employs a bodyguard for protection. Fortunately for Alex the man doesn't recognise him as his attacker but he does recognise him from the newspapers as the government test subject. Mr Alexander is a political activist who is very anti government-policy and sees this as an opportunity to discredit the government. He calls some friends while Alex is having a bath - but then while Alex is singing a happy song to himself in the bathroom Mr Alexander recognises it as the same one sung while the gang leader was terrorising them and realises exactly who he is. Mr Alexander discovers Alex's aversion to Beethoven's 9th and then vengefully plays it loudly into his upstairs guest bedroom after locking him in - and with no escape and with an ever more suicidal nauseous feeling overcoming him Alex feels compelled to jump from the window to try and kill himself. He is badly injured and taken to hospital and the government's political opponents have a field day in the press saying that the government's inhuman cure drove a poor boy to attempt suicide. The minister visits Alex in hospital in an effort to minimise the political damage and offers to set Alex up in a good well paid job if he co-operates and they can all come to an "understanding". And as Alex poses for the press shaking hands with the minister he has an erotic fantasy without feeling nauseous and realises the "cure" has worn off and he is back! | |
| Starring: | Malcolm McDowell (as Alex) |
| Featuring: | (Friends and Family) Sheila Raynor (as Alex's mother), Philip Stone (as Alex's father), Warren Clarke (as Dim, Alex's gang), James Marcus (as Georgie, Alex's gang), Michael Tarn (as Pete, Alex's gang), Clive Francis (as Lodger at Alex's home) (Prison and Police) Michael Bates (as Chief Prison Guard Barnes), Anthony Sharp (as Minister of the Interior), Michael Gover (as Prison Governor), Godfrey Quigley (as Prison Chaplain), Aubrey Morris (as Mr Deltoid, Alex's probation officer), Steven Berkoff (as Detective), Lindsay Campbell (as Police Inspector), John Clive (as Stage Actor, testing Alex's violence aversion) (Victims and Associates) Patrick Magee (Mr Frank Alexander, writer), Adrienne Corri (as Mrs Alexander), Miriam Karlin (as Miss Weathers, lady who is robbed), John Savident (as Political Conspirator, friend of Frank), Margaret Tyzack (as Political Conspirator, friend of Frank), Paul Farrell (as Tramp), David Prowse (as Julian, Frank Alexander's bodyguard) (Medical Centre and Hospital) Carl Duering (as Dr Brodsky, at medical centre), Madge Ryan (as Dr Branom, at medical centre), Pauline Taylor (as Dr Taylor, Hospital Psychiatrist), Carol Drinkwater (as Hospital Nurse) |
| Starlets: | Gaye Brown (as Singing woman in the Milkbar), Jan Adair, Vivienne Chandler, and Prudence Drage (as 3 Handmaidens in Alex's Roman Bible fantasy), Cheryl Grunwald (as Rape Victim in Aversion therapy film), Gillian Hills (as Blonde girl in record shop), Barbara Scott (as Brunette girl in record shop), Shirley Jaffe (as Girl being terrorised by rival gang), Virginia Wetherell (as Stage Actress, testing Alex's sexual aversion), Katya Wyeth (as Girl in Alex's closing fantasy) |
| The Collector (1965) | Previous Next |
| Writers: Stanley Mann, John Kohn / Director: William Wyler / Producers: Jud Kinberg, John Kohn | |
| Type: Chiller | Running Time: 114 mins |
| Freddie Clegg is a meek-mannered and introverted young man who finds it hard to interact socially with people - especially women. He works at a bank but his peculiarities make him the butt of office pranks. However, he has a stroke of good fortune when he wins a jackpot of £71,000 on the football pools and is able to quit his job and live by his own means. Freddie is an avid lepidopterist and specialises in collecting butterflies. One day whilst out in the country catching new specimens he comes across an isolated Old Tudor House for sale. It has an expansive external underground cellar which Freddie realises is ideal for something special he has in mind concerning a particular young woman he admires called Miranda Grey. He proceeds to buy the house and spends time installing the cellar with power and plumbing and equipping it with some home comforts. And then he is ready ...
Miranda Grey is a beautiful and popular young art student who is on her way home on a seemingly normal day. But unknown to her she has been under the watchful scrutiny of Freddie for some time and he knows her routine. He abducts her in a quiet lane using chloroform and when she wakes up she finds herself locked in a dungeon-like cellar. The room is equipped with a bed and there is a wardrobe of clothes and books for her to read. Someone has gone to a lot of trouble to provide for her but she has no idea why she has been kidnapped - it can't be for money because her family is not rich. Freddie enters with a tray of food and greets her. He tells her he has given her all she needs to be happy and wants her to be his guest. He appears infatuated with her and tells her how he has followed her around for ages adoring her from afar without her knowing. What he wants is to get to know her and for her to like him - therefore he has brought her here. She is dumbfounded by his effrontery and demands to be set free but it is clear Freddie is not going to listen to reason. She insists that a time limit be placed on her captivity if he wants her to cooperate and they eventually agree that it will last for one month. The days and weeks pass in which she makes a few attempts to escape but it is futile because Freddie has meticulously planned for every possibility. He treats her with great respect at all times and she never feels directly threatened. They talk but he cannot understand the point of some of her favourite things - he finds abstract arty things unfathomable and believes people who see any value in them are just pretending in order to sound superior and humiliate people like him. He periodically lets her out of the cellar for fresh air or to come to the main house for a bath - but only with her hands tied to prevent her trying to escape. On one such visit to the main house she views his collection of butterflies which he proudly shows her. But far from being impressed she finds it sad that he has killed so many beautiful things. She realises that he has "collected" her and wonders if she'll ever be released. She marks the days and eventually the date of her promised release arrives. She is happy because Freddie appears to be keeping to his word and getting ready to let her go. She agrees to have a farewell dinner with him in the house that evening desperate not to upset him and cause him to change his mind. During the meal Freddie tells her how much he has enjoyed the time she has spent with him and that the whole point of holding her here was so that she could grow to like him. He proceeds to propose marriage telling her he only wants to make her happy and he wouldn't expect her to be intimate with him only to live with him openly and willingly. She is repulsed and realises that he never had any intention of letting her go. She is returned to the cellar and the routine continues - she is now convinced that she will never be released and he will keep her here forever as part of his collection. She plans a desperate action and after a bath she seduces him thinking that that is what he ultimately wants. But he finds her behaviour abhorrent and no better than a common whore - he tells her he has lost his respect for her and she realises she has made a serious error. On the way back to the cellar in the pouring rain she drops some of her toiletries as if by accident and when he stoops to pick them up she hits him over the head with a nearby spade. He is badly injured but just manages to get her locked up again in a dazed state. She is wet with her hands still bound and unable to dry herself in the cold dank cellar - her electric fire has broken and she has no heat. She is scared that Freddie might die and she'll be forever trapped in here. She endures three days until Freddie has recovered enough to make a reappearance. By this time she has caught a chill and developed a fever. Freddie panics and rushes to the village to get her some medication. He leaves all the doors open but she is too weak to escape. When Freddie returns Miranda has died. Freddie is mortified and does not understand what he did wrong. Why she refused to fall in love with him when he had made it so simple for her. He wonders if he is to blame but then realises that she brought it all on herself when she caused him to lose his respect. He buries her and determines that his big mistake was to aim too high with a woman like Miranda who thought she was too good for him with her arty ideas. And he is soon on the lookout for a more ordinary candidate with whom he can try it all over again... | |
| Starring: | Terence Stamp (as Freddie Clegg aka Gerald Franklin), Samantha Eggar (as Miranda Grey) |
| Featuring: | Maurice Dallimore (as Freddie's Neighbour), Mona Washbourne (as Aunt Annie, Freddie's aunt, cameo in B&W flashback scene) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the novel by John Fowles |
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Freddie is the lead character's real name which is mentioned once in a flashback scene although his surname of Clegg is not heard being used (perhaps that comes from the book). However in his dealings with Miranda he uses a pseudonym and she knows him as Gerald Franklin. |
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The version reviewed was in letterbox format and Samanatha Eggar's nudity was cropped below the frame. However a clip from a full screen version has also been seen which shows the whole frame in which she is seen topless. |
| Come Back Peter (1969) | Previous Next |
| aka: Some Like It Sexy (1976 re-release) | |
| Writer/Director/Producer: Donovan Winter | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 75 mins |
| A man called Peter is seen visiting a succession of lady-friends around London having long chats and then sometimes sex. There is no plot reason or pretext for these visits - he leaves one place and then is immediately seen knocking on the door of the next. Once inside most of the scene is himself and the lady just chatting about nothing particularly interesting - usually he has sex with the woman but these are very tamely shot with little or no nudity and for most with body doubles for an occasional glimpse of a breast. The only exception is a mid-film scene with the Collinson Twins in which they both get naked very quickly with little or no pre-amble (see Notes for further info on this). The conclusion of the film attempts to bind it all together by showing that all these scenes were Peter's daydream of a glamorous gallivanting lifestyle when in reality he is a butcher's assistant in a drab job | |
| Comment: It's a fairly tedious film. It must have been made before nudity became more commonplace because it hardly has any - even though it would seem to be a film designed for exactly that purpose - because as a film in its own right it has nothing much else going for it and the dull chats he has with all the women offer no interest on a purely dramatic level. The only exception is the Collinson's scene which is fun and energetic and had the whole film been made in that same way it would have been much more worthwhile. | |
| Starring: | Christopher Matthews (as Peter) |
| Starlets: | Erika Bergmann (body double used), Penny Riley (body double used), Yolande Turner, Madeline Smith (brief cameo - credited as Maddy Smith), Mary Collinson, Madeleine Collinson, Valerie St. Hélène, Annabel Leventon, Nicola Pagett (body double used) |
| NOTES: | |
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"Come Back Peter" was the original title when this film was released in the UK. Some months later when it was released abroad some new material was shot - this included a whole new scene that featured the Collinson Twins. Star Christopher Matthews was recalled to film this new scene - the insertion of the new scene is seamless because the whole film is just a series of unconnected encounters anyway so there is no plot narrative to take into account. This new scene is (to be honest) by far and away the best thing about this movie and the only one with any sense of fun. The film was re-released in the UK in 1976 inclusive of the extra scene under the changed title of "Some Like It Sexy" (which is the title of the version reviewed here) although a song with lyrics including the words "Come Back Peter" plays at various intervals throughout the film. |
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Mary and Madeleine Collinson receive an "introducing" credit for this film. |
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Nicola Pagett features in one of the scenes and although her role is just as big as any of the other credited girls that Peter visits she is oddly not credited. |
| Come Play with Me (1977) | Previous Next |
| Writer/Director/Producer: George Harrison Marks | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 90 mins |
| Two wanted banknote forgers decide to pack up and take their printing press and plates with them. Undercover of being musicians they arrive at a little used health farm believing it to be a secluded place where they can safely print enough bank notes to retire on. But the health farm is about to undergo a change in fortunes as the owner's nephew arrives from abroad with a coach load of sexy young exotic dancers after a tour of the continent. The young girls don sexy nurses outfits which helps to give the resort a brand new image and make it very popular. There are other subplots involving an inept government minister trying to investigate the forged bank notes using a private detective and a night-club hostess, and some villainous-types on the forgers trail wanting to get their hands on those valuable plates. | |
| Comment: The subplots don't gel together very well with some being seemingly forgotten for ages before resuming. In the middle there's an odd song-and-dance number when Alfie Bass and George Harrison Marks start singing for no particular reason with the sexy nurses all dancing in choreographed fashion. | |
| Starring: | George Harrison Marks, Alfie Bass (as the forgers) |
| Featuring: | Irene Handl, Ronald Fraser, Tommy Godfrey, Ken Parry, Cardew Robinson, Talfryn Thomas, Sue Longhurst |
| Star-Turns: | Henry McGee, Bob Todd, Rita Webb, Queenie Watts |
| Starlets: | Suzy Mandel, Mary Millington, Anna Bergman, Nicola Austin, Sonia, Pat Astley, Penny Chisholm, Suzette Sangallo, Mireille Allonville, Suzette St. Clair, Marta Gillot (as the Nurses), Deirdre Costello, Lisa Taylor |
| Also: | (Cameos) Norman Vaughan, Valentine Dyall |
| NOTES: | |
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The end credits mix-up Anna Bergman and Pat Astley transposing the character names they were referred to by in the dialogue. Also Pat Astley is shown as "Pat Ashley" |
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"Come Play With Me" is the slogan used in the Health Farm's newspaper advert campaign accompanied by a picture of a sexy topless nurse to entice the paying public to visit |
| The Comeback (1978) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Murray Smith / Director/Producer: Pete Walker | |
| Type: Chiller | Running Time: 96 mins |
| American singer Nick Cooper is a former pop idol who is attempting to make a comeback after six years away from the business while he was married to his wife Gail. Now they are divorced and he has returned to Britain where he originally found his greatest fame to record a new album. Gail is also in town and visits their now disused penthouse apartment to collect a few belongings - but there is an intruder and she is brutally slain by a mad old gibbering woman with a hand scythe and her body is left to putrefy undiscovered.
Nick meanwhile has met up with his former agent/manager Webster (Web) Jones who has arranged for him to rent a mansion to live in while the tenants are away on a long vacation. The estate called Foxwarren Park is being minded by an elderly live-in married couple Mr and Mrs B who act as gardener and housekeeper. Mrs B welcomes Nick warmly and says she is such a fan of his music and has all his albums and keeps up to date with all the fan gossip about him. At night in the mansion Nick hears strange sobbing noises and goes to investigate but cannot find where they are coming from. He quizzes Mrs B about it next morning but she says she heard nothing. These noises of sobbing and later sinister laughter are a nightly occurrence and he gets increasingly agitated about it. He even sees a decaying corpse of a woman outside his door in a wheelchair but next time he looks it is gone and Mrs B again is very understanding but has no idea what he could have seen. Nick starts to get very friendly with Web's secretary Linda and they have an affair and she spends the night with him - during the night he wakes to hear more noises and Linda has gone from the bed. He gets up to look around for her and goes down in to the cellar where he finds a gift-wrapped hatbox. He opens it and finds a putrefied head that looks like his ex-wife Gail. This causes him to have a breakdown and he is taken to hospital where the psychiatrist diagnoses nervous fatigue leading to hysterical hallucinations. After a week he is released with the advice to ignore any noises and his mind will heal itself. But then back at the mansion the truth emerges when he attacked by the mad woman and it is revealed "she" is Mr B wearing a mask. He is working under the direction of Mrs B who vehemently tells Nick she hates him and holds him responsible for the death of their daughter Rosebud six years ago. Rosebud had idolised Nick and her bedroom was like a fan shrine - but when his marriage to Gail was announced she was so distraught she killed herself. Mrs B despises Nick and the lewd suggestive songs of the pop world that corrupt the young and make them behave like farmyard beasts. She hated having to pretend to be civil and fawning to him while their plan played out. Then at his wife's command Mr B takes a powerful swing at Nick with his axe but Nick dodges and it hacks into Mrs B instead mortally wounding her. As Mr B comforts his dying wife Nick hears a knocking upstairs and goes to investigate - he finds a bricked up wall and breaks it down and inside is Linda and the mummified corpse of Rosebud. It is the daughter's bedroom untouched since the day she died. Linda tells him what she discovered that Mr and Mrs B were playing the noises into the house on loudspeakers to send Nick mad and then they were going to brick him up in the room too to die with her. It also emerges that there were never any vacationing tenants and in fact Mr and Mrs B were the owners posing as domestic staff. | |
| Starring: | Jack Jones (as Nick Cooper), Pamela Stephenson (as Linda Everett), David Doyle (as Webster Jones), Sheila Keith (as Mrs B) |
| Featuring: | Bill Owen (as Mr B), Holly Palance (as Gail Cooper), Peter Turner (as Harry, Nick's assistant), Richard Johnson (as Psychiatrist) |
| Starlets: | June Chadwick, Penny Irving |
| The Comedy Man (1964) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Peter Yeldham / Director: Alvin Rakoff / Producer: Jon Penington | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 88 mins |
| Chick Byrd is a struggling actor in his early-40s who scrapes a living as a touring repertory theatre performer. But when he is sacked for sleeping with the producer's wife and makes an embarrassing speech to the audience at the end of his final performance he finds himself out of favour with casting directors and unable to get further work.
Chick returns to London and stays in some cheap digs with an actor friend called Julian Baxter. Chick lives off benefits as he struggles to look for any sort of acting work in London theatre-land. Acting work is hard to come by for many of his fellow professionals and lots of his acting friends are in the same boat - but Chick refuses to try his hand at anything else and months go by with little or no work - he does draw the line at doing commercials however which is the only thing he gets offered. To make matters worse Julian gets a big break and wins a part in a Hollywood movie and heads off to Africa for filming. Another out-of-work actor friend called Jack Lavery is so desperate he commits suicide and in an ironic twist the day after his death his wife receives a phone call saying he has been offered an acting job. Although feeling somewhat guilty Chick volunteers to take the work instead even though it is for a TV commercial for a brand of breath freshening lozenges. And as fate would have it the commercial proves a hit and leads to a series of successful commercials for Chick playing the same character getting himself into comic scrapes. He becomes a publicly known face and is dubbed "Mr Honeybreath". Although the commercials prove lucrative Chick hates the work and wants to get back to proper acting but now he has become typecast to an image. Nevertheless he holds a party celebrating his success but is given perspective on his new-found fame when his friend Jack returns. Jack's Hollywood movie was a huge success and he has become an A-list star with all the opportunity that Chick so wants for himself. As a result Chick decides to finish with the commercials and now that he is back in favour go up North and join a repertory theatre and return to the grass roots acting that he so loves. | |
| Starring: | Kenneth More (as Chick Byrd), Billie Whitelaw (as Judy, former girlfriend of Chick), Cecil Parker (as Thomas Rutherford, elderly out-of-work actor friend), Dennis Price (as Tommy Morns, actors' agent), Angela Douglas (as Fay Trubshaw, young actress who has an affair with Chick) |
| Featuring: | Norman Rossington (as Theodore Littleton, salesman lodging at same house as Chick), Edmund Purdom (as Julian Baxter, becomes a successful Hollywood star), Frank Finlay (as Prout, an agent), Alan Dobie (as Jack Lavery, struggling actor), Jacqueline Hill (Sandy, Jack's wife), J.G. Devlin (as Sloppitt, landlord) |
| Starlets: | Valerie and Leila Croft (as Yvonne and Pauline, twins) |
| NOTES: | |
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From the novel by Douglas Hayes |
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Made in Black and White |
| The Committee (1968) | Previous Next |
| Writers: Max Steuer, Peter Sykes / Director: Peter Sykes / Producer: Max Steuer | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 55 mins |
| (The central figure in this film is unnamed but for this summary I'll call him "Paul" after the actor who plays him) Paul is hitchhiking and is picked up by a driver who does so to relieve his own monotony and have a bit of conversation. But Paul is a bit unforthcoming in that department and finds the driver's concern with trivialities annoying. When they stop in some woods so the driver can make quick repairs to the engine Paul impulsively slams the bonnet down on his neck and decapitates him. He then carries the head away with him. But after a time he decides to return and sews the head back onto the man's body. The driver recovers and goes on his way a bit dazed and bewildered as to what has happened. Some time later Paul receives a letter summoning him to attend a Committee. A "Committee" is a secretive gathering of randomly selected members of the public formed together to decide on various matters - some trivial and others of great import. He joins hundreds of other Committee attendees at a country retreat where they are all treated to luxury facilities with varied social activities on offer before they begin their work. Paul is worried and thinks the whole Committee might be about him because the driver he "killed" is one of the other attendees although he does not remember Paul. During the course of his stay the Committee director singles Paul out and takes him to one side to ask him about the decapitation incident which Paul says he did for a laugh to scare other people with the head but then changed his mind and put the driver's head back. They proceed to have an intellectual conversation and philosophical discussion on the nature of one's identity in the universe and the role of human society in the grand scheme of things. Paul then leaves the retreat with a girl he meets. The End (nothing is explained). | |
| Starring: | Paul Jones (as Central figure), Tom Kempinski (as Car Driver, his victim), Robert Lloyd (as Committee Director) |
| Featuring: | Jimmy Gardner (as Central figure's boss) |
| Star-Turns: | Arthur Brown (The Crazy World of Arthur Brown, masked singer) |
| Starlets: | Pauline Munro (as Girl, very small role) |
| NOTES: | |
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Made in Black and White |
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Music by Pink Floyd |
| Commuter Husbands (1973) | Previous Next |
| Writer/Director: Derek Ford / Producer: Morton Lewis | |
| Type: Anthology / Sex | Running Time: 83 mins |
| An anthology of mini-stories geared towards showing how men fare in the battle of the sexes. The stories are linked by a wife called Carol who introduces six reports of the conflict in progress.
Story 1 (7 minutes) Dennis phones his wife from work to tell her he has to go on a weekend business trip to Edinburgh although he is actually planning on taking his young secretary on a dirty weekend to an out-of-the way hotel he knows. This absence suits his wife because she is also having a secret affair with a much younger man and decides her husband's business trip will be an ideal opportunity for her to have a few days away somewhere quiet with her lover. But as luck would have it the husband and wife have picked the same hotel and both their secrets are exposed. They selected this hotel for their respective sexual trysts because it is where they stayed for their honeymoon twelve years ago. They go for a walk to talk about what future there is for their marriage and decide a split is the only option. But when they get back to the hotel they find that their younger partners have paired up and no longer want them. Story 2 (17 minutes) Small-time plumber Arthur Benbow gets an emergency call to fix a sauna. Although a bit outside his usual line of work the woman is desperate because she is having a party that evening and when Arthur discovers she is Carla Berlin the famous saucy film actress he says he'll come round and see what he can do. Carla is out when he arrives at her large townhouse and so he starts work in the boiler room. After a while he takes a break and the party is in full swing - he goes up into the house to take a look and all the guests seem to be participating in sexual goings-on. He realises what a great opportunity this is for him to taste some erotic pleasures and he goes to the bathroom to have a bath knowing that once out of his work clothes he will not look out of place. But after his bath the door handle breaks trapping him inside and he has to leave through the window unable to get back inside where all the "action" is taking place. So he goes to finish off the job he came for but gets lucky in the end when a sexy young naked starlet comes down to see how he's getting on with the repairs and asks him to give her a massage with his oily hands. Story 3 (6 minutes) No real story to this one and no dialogue except for some scene setting narration - we see a smart city gent on his way to work as he admires a parked motorbike and proceeds to have a daydream fantasy about himself as a cool dude with five naked biker chicks to cavort with. Story 4 (11 minutes) Arnold is a middle-aged married man who has been visiting the same Soho flat every Thursday for 25 years. The prostitute who occupies the flat has changed over the years but he has remained loyal to the location. The latest occupant is Lola and for her Arnold makes a nice change because all he ever wants to do is talk - and he even lets her carry on with her regular business while he's there - whenever a normal punter comes round Arnold will hide in the bathroom while she sees to the punter's requirements. However Arnold has a secret reason for always choosing this flat for he has discovered in the bathroom a two-way mirror that lets him view the activities of a prostitute in the adjoining flat and "peeping" on others having sex is what he enjoys. But on this particular occasion Lola comes in to the bathroom and at last finds out what Arnold has been up to all these years and accuses him of being a dirty old man and bans him from coming round any more. When Arnold has gone we find that his wife was there as well hiding in another room and had make a secret arrangement with Lola to discover Arnold's "secret" and ban him. Story 5 (16 minutes) Raymond Hardacre is on a quick business trip to Amsterdam to get some papers signed for his company. But when he arrives he finds that his contact Mr Van Hoffen has been called away on urgent business and won't be back until the next day meaning Ray will have to stay overnight. Van Hoffen's secretary Trudi is tasked with entertaining Ray and she takes him to the company's hospitality apartment. Ray knows he is tired from jetlag because he keeps imagining Trudi naked in the office and apartment and then when they go sightseeing - but when he makes a pass at her she becomes angry. Later back at the apartment she mellows and strips off for real but Ray has fallen asleep and she indignantly goes to have a bath instead. When Ray awakens he goes to the bathroom and finds her welcoming but then slips over on a bar of soap and breaks his leg and has to return to England in a wheelchair and leg cast. Story 6 (21 minutes) Married man John Appleby is instructed by his boss to entertain a very important Italian client called Mario Abrizzi at the company apartment and to bring with him a couple of eager women with whom Mario can enjoy himself. John knows no such women except Marion who is one of his wife's friends whom he knows is a bit of a swinger. John calls his wife Carol to see if she can get Marion to come along and bring a friend with her and he tells Carol all about what his boss has asked him to do. But Carol has no intention of letting her husband entertain with a pair of sexually liberated swingers so she comes along herself as Marion's friend so she can keep an eye on him. Mario has no idea that Carol is John's wife and he ends up preferring Carol and John has no choice but to allow the two of them to retire to the bedroom. Carol for her part quite fancies Mario and knows that she can happily enjoy herself and then if necessary blame it all on John afterwards. When the evening is over Carol assures John that all Mario wanted to do all night was talk because he despises these swingers do's that John's boss always seems to feel the need to arrange for him whenever he is in town but goes along with it just to fit in - and John is satisfied and relieved at her explanation - but afterwards we see Carol giving her friend a big secretive wink. NOTE: Carol is the linking Story Teller for the whole film and this final story was introduced by her as her own guilty secret. | |
| Comment: Despite possible appearances the film is not a series of pornographic shorts and in fact story 6 (which is the longest) has no nudity at all, although like the others has a sexual theme. | |
| Starring: | Gabrielle Drake (as The Story Teller/Carol Appleby, linking presenter and star of story 6) |
| Featuring: | Story 1: Robin Bailey (as The Husband), Heather Chasen (as The Wife), Jane Cardew (as The Husband's Secretary), Ray Marlowe (as The Wife's Lover) Story 2: Dick Haydon (as Arthur Benbow, plumber), Claire Gordon (as Carla Berlin, starlet) Story 3: Mike Briton (as The Dreamer), Nicola Austine (as The Main Dream Girl) - the other 4 dream girls are uncredited although one has been identified as Tara Lynn Story 4: Dervis Ward (as Arnold, the Husband), Brenda Peters (as Lola, The Prostitute), Dorothea Phillips (as Arnold's Wife) Story 5: Timothy Parks (as Raymond Hardacre, the Visitor), Yocki Rhodes (as Trudi, The Secretary) Story 6: Robin Culver (as John Appleby, The Husband), George Selway (as Mr Charlesworth, John's boss), John Barcroft (as Mario Abrizzi, the businessman), Valerie Stanton (as Marion, Carol's friend) - story also stars Gabrielle Drake (as Carol, John's wife) |
| Starlets: | (listed on credits as "also appearing" without specifying character or which story they appear in - but where known by recognition this is indicated, and where speculative this is noted with a ?) Valerie Wallace (as Hotel Receptionist, story 1), Mia Martin (as Corridor Girl at party, story 2), Fiona Victory (as Meditating Girl at party, story 2), Francoise Unwin (as ?French Girl at party who comes down to basement to talk to plumber?) (Other female names whose particular appearance point in film can't be readily determined) Pat Montgomery, Shirley Harmer, Amanda Hawes |
| NOTES: | |
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This film was a follow-up to the same production team's Suburban Wives (1971) which told its stories from the wives perspective. |
| Conduct Unbecoming (1975) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Robert Enders / Director: Michael Anderson / Producer: Michael Deeley | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 107 mins |
| Set in Patajapur, India in 1878. Two new officers are on their way to join the 20th Indian Light Cavalry for a probationary period of service. 2nd Lieutenant Arthur Drake is very enthusiastic about being part of a great tradition but his companion 2nd Lieutenant Edward Millington has a very derisive attitude and intends to make his stay in the army as brief as possible.
Drake and Millington arrive at barracks and meet the various senior officers including easy going Major Loach and stringent authoritarian Captain Harper. The pair are instructed on the strict code of discipline and honour expected of them. Drake is considered a team player but Millington's sneering manner soon marks him out as an undesirable by the senior ranks. The regiment holds an annual commemoration for a brave officer called Captain John Scarlett who died three years ago in battle. Major Loach had been the one who found Scarlett's body which had been savagely mutilated by the enemy. Scarlett's attractive widow Marjorie still lives in the compound and is accorded the greatest of respect although Drake and Millington are warned to avoid her as she can be a bit of a femme fatale. At a regimental party, ladies man Millington makes a beeline for Mrs Scarlett in an effort to charm her. He follows her into a quiet grove and persists with his romantic efforts... Next thing we see is Mrs Scarlett rushing back into the party screaming in terror in a highly distressed state. She points out Drake as her attacker and he is taken into custody on charges of conduct unbecoming an officer. The subaltern officers convene an unofficial trial in order to avoid the scandal of a full court martial. The proceedings are considered a mere formality as Drake's guilt seems unquestioned and he himself is not denying it. Millington considers the events of light consequence because dismissal from the army would suit him perfectly and he therefore sees little purpose to protesting his innocence. Captain Harper is the appointed court president (judge) and Drake is selected to act as Millington's defence counsel. It is made clear to Drake that his function is of a perfunctory nature and he need do nothing more than go through the motions. But Drake has a keen sense of justice and he is determined to undertake his duties with all due diligence and present a robust defence. However Drake finds all his efforts to introduce quizzical evidence and highlight inconsistencies in sworn testimony ruled as inadmissible by the court president. During a recess Drake is reminded by Harper that his attitude in persisting with his line of questioning is extremely unhelpful and unnecessarily prolonging what should be a straightforward matter. Drake learns that the punishment planned for Millington when he is found guilty is not a discharge but an extended detention in the army until he learns to show the regiment respect. When Millington learns this he starts to take the situation more seriously and makes it clear to Drake that he did not assault Mrs Scarlett and doesn't know why she is saying he did. Drake continues his undaunted efforts to unearth evidence despite the growing ire of the exasperated court president. Eventually however Drake starts to uncover information that even the court cannot deny sheds serious doubt on Millington's guilt. In particular Drake discovers that there was an almost identical attack on another woman six months previously before Millington had even arrived. The attacker's description makes Drake start to believe that the late Captain Scarlett is still alive and carrying out random attacks and that certain officers are conspiring to keep him protected for the honour of the regiment. Drake's probing cross-examination eventually induces Mrs Scarlett to admit it was not Millington who attacked her but she declines to give the name of the man who did. In light of this admission the court has no choice but to find Millington not guilty. Drake is let into the big secret and discovers that the attacker is none other than Major Roach. His sanity was challenged when he discovered the horror of Scarlett's remains and from time to time he feels he has become possessed by the spirit of the dead officer. During these times he considers it his responsibility to punish women who are in his view of a low moral character - including war widows who should remain faithful to their dead husbands. Roach is told that the regiment can no longer shield him. He is given a gun and left by himself to do the honourable thing and shoot himself. Drake decides to resign his commission having become dismayed that the regiment is prepared to hold the importance of its own honour above fair justice. | |
| Starring: | Michael York (as 2nd Lt Arthur Drake), James Faulkner (as 2nd Lt Edward Millington, accused man), Stacy Keach (as Captain Harper), Susannah York (as Mrs Marjorie Scarlett), Richard Attenborough (as Major Lionel Roach), Trevor Howard (as Colonel Benjamin Strang), Christopher Plummer (as Major Alastair Wimbourne), Michael Culver (as Lt Richard Fothergill) |
| Featuring: | Rafiq Anwar (as Pradah Singh, Indian servant at British HQ), James Donald (as Doctor), Helen Cherry (as Mrs Strang, colonel's wife), David Neville (as 2nd Lt Truly), Persis Khambatta (as Mrs Bandanai) |
| NOTES: | |
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From the play by Barry England |
| Writer: Christopher Wood / Director: Norman Cohen / Producer: Greg Smith | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 85 mins |
| Timothy Lea and his brother in law Sid have taken jobs as Holiday Hosts at Funfrall Holiday Camp. Tim organises a beauty contest and finds that there are no end of beautiful girls who'll do anything to increase their chances of success. | |
| Starring: | Robin Askwith (as Timothy Lea), Anthony Booth (as Sid) |
| Featuring: | Sheila White (as Tim's sister/Sid's wife), Doris Hare as (Tim's mother), Bill Maynard (as Tim's father), Linda Hayden, Lance Percival, John Junkin, Liz Fraser |
| Familiar Faces: | Nicholas Bond-Owen (familiar as the young son of the next door neighbours in George and Mildred) |
| Starlets: | Caroline Ellis, Sue Upton, Penny Meredith, Kim Hardy, Nicola Blackman, Janet Edis, Deborah Brayshaw, Carrie Jones, Julia Bond, Marianne Stone |
| NOTES: | |
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This is the final film in the "Confessions" series starring Robin Askwith. The previous one was Confessions of a Driving Instructor (1976) |
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Linda Hayden was also in the first "Confessions" film Confessions of a Window Cleaner (1974) - but here she plays a different character |
| Writer: Joe Ireland / Director/Producer: Willy Roe | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 92 mins |
| David Galaxy is an astrologer whom the police suspect of being involved in a security robbery five years previously and ask him to remember what he was doing on the day in question. The police can't prove the first alibi so they ask for more but each alibi he gives has become unverifiable due to various circumstance. | |
| Comment: The crime plot is very thinly spread as the police give him a ludicrous amount of time to come up with each alibi before leisurely checking it and then asking him to come up with another. In between David Galaxy gets on with his life which includes a bet with his friend Steve that he can satisfy Millicant Cumming (the only woman in the world never to have had an orgasm); and a disagreement with his apartment complex's new owner who wants to get rid of him from her building. The astrology aspect of his character doesn't really factor into it except when he mentions it a few times. | |
| Starring: | Alan Lake (as David Galaxy), Anthony Booth (as Steve), Glynn Edwards (as Police Inspector) |
| Featuring: | Diana Dors, Bernie Winters |
| Familiar Faces: | Kenny Lynch, Queenie Watts, Ballard Berkeley |
| Starlets: | Mary Millington, Sally Faulkner, Rosemary England, Cindy Truman, Vicki Scott, Maria Parkinson (body doubled), Tina Kirsch, Lindy Benson, Diana Hicks, Jannette Caron, Faith Daykin, Pamela Healey, Penny Kendall, Claire Nicholson, Lou Soame, Barbara Eatwell, Valerie Minifie |
| NOTES: | |
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This is not a film in the "Confessions" series |
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Diana Dors sings the theme tune |
| Writer: Christopher Wood / Director: Norman Cohen / Producer: Greg Smith | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 87 mins |
| Timmy has just passed his driving instructor's exam (with a little help from a compliant female tester) and joins up with Sid who has just bought-out a run-down driving school and called it the NogLea School of Motoring. Its offices are situated next to the Truscott driving school who resent the newcomers starting up and trying to take away their customers. Meanwhile Tim finds lodgings with his firm's secretary and discovers her mother can't seem to keep her hands off him although he would sooner have that sort of fun with the daughter. NogLea have some success although Tim finds that his female customers are more interested in something else unconnected with driving. Tim also becomes friendly with rival Truscott's rugby mad daughter and eventually Truscott plans a merger/takeover of NogLea as a way of getting rid of them - although nothing too much comes of that plot idea because at the end of the film one of the NogLea lesson cars gets trashed and this apparently seems to be enough to put them out of business because they give up the driving school venture after that mishap. | |
| Starring: | Robin Askwith (as Tim), Anthony Booth (as Sid) |
| Featuring: | Sheila White (as Tim's Sister/Sid's Wife), Doris Hare (as Tim's mother), Bill Maynard (as Tim's father), Windsor Davies (as Truscott), Lynda Bellingham (as Truscott's daughter), Liz Fraser (as Tim's landlady), George Layton, Avril Angers |
| Familiar Faces: | Irene Handl, Donald Hewlett, Ballard Berkeley, Damaris Hayman, John Junkin, Geoffrey Hughes |
| Starlets: | Maxine Casson, Chrissy Iddon, Sally Faulkner, Suzy Mandel, Sally Adez |
| NOTES: | |
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This is the third film in the "Confessions" series starring Robin Askwith. The previous one was Confessions of a Pop Performer (1975). In some continuity with the other films their window cleaning business from the first film Confessions of a Window Cleaner (1974) is referred to and at the end in a foreshadowment of the next film in the series Confessions from a Holiday Camp (1977), Sid sees a poster for Funfrall Holiday camp and suggests to Tim that they could try their luck there. |
| Writer: Christopher Wood / Director: Norman Cohen / Producer: Greg Smith | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 87 mins |
| Timothy Lea and his brother-in-law Sid give up their window cleaning service and become managers of a pop group. And when the drummer gets injured Tim stands in as they try to become famous by appearing on a TV talent show with plenty of opportunities for dalliances with the opposite sex along the way. | |
| Starring: | Robin Askwith (as Timothy Lea), Anthony Booth (as Sid) |
| Featuring: | Sheila White (as Tim's sister/Sid's wife), Doris Hare as (Tim's mother), Bill Maynard (as Tim's father), Bob Todd, Jill Gascoine, Peter Jones, Peter Cleall |
| Familiar Faces: | Rula Lenska, David Prowse |
| Star-Turns: | Ian Lavender, Rita Webb, Bill Pertwee, David Hamilton (the DJ) |
| Starlets: | Carol Hawkins, Diane Langton, Linda Regan, Margaret Heald, Irene Gorst, Andee Cromarty, Anita Kay, Maggie Wright, Susan St. Clair, Helli Louise, Sally Harrison, Lynda Westover, Jane Hayden, Bobby Sparrow |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the second "Confessions" film in the series starring Robin Askwith that started with Confessions of a Window Cleaner (1974). The supporting cast remained the same except for Doris Hare who replaced Dandy Nicholls as Tim's mother. The next film in the series was Confessions of a Driving Instructor (1976). |
| aka: Design For Lust | |
| Writer: Alan Paz / Director/Producer: Alan Birkinshaw | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 76 mins |
| Henry Milligan is a junior architect whose boss assigns him the urgent rush task of designing a luxury marina complex for an Australian resort. The boss then leaves to go on a lecture tour. Henry is stuck for ideas and then in a dream inspiration hits - he will base the design of the buildings on the shape of a woman's breast. But first he needs to find the ideal breast to model it on so he advertises in a magazine for volunteers and a succession of women duly arrive at his office to disrobe and let him take detailed measurements of their attributes. Other women he visits in person at their homes. But despite all these examples he does not manage to find the perfect breast he is looking for. Almost running out of time he finally realises the prime example was under his nose all along in the shape of his boss's secretary Hilary and manages to complete his design just in time for the boss's return home. | |
| Comments: This is a fairly poor offering overall. I've classed it as a comedy more by default than anything. It's not a serious drama even though it's played straight but there are no deliberate jokes or much to laugh at other than the sheer ludicrousness of the plot and the amazing willingness of the girls to disrobe so this scruffy bloke can measure them. Vicki Hodge as the secretary puts in a creditable performance. | |
| Starring: | Roger Lloyd-Pack (as Henry Milligan), Vicki Hodge (as Hilary the secretary) |
| Featuring: | Derek Royle (as the Boss) |
| Starlets: | Stefanie Marrian, Louise Rush, Candy Baker, Ava Cadell, Cheryl Gilham, Carole Hayman, Jeanette Marsden, Bobby Sparrow, Zoe Hendry, Monica Ringwood, Glenda Allen, Audrey Frank, Jo Peters |
| NOTES: | |
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This is not one of the films in the Timothy Lea "Confessions" series. It was made after the first Confessions film came out but before the second had been made and it was therefore not then yet a series |
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Roger Lloyd Pack is best known for playing "Trigger" in BBC sitcom Only Fools and Horses |
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Derek Royle may not be a well known name but his face may be familiar - he was the "dead body" in a classic Fawlty Towers episode. He has a star turn sort of role appearing at the beginning before going on a lecture tour and then at the end when he returns. |
| Writer: Christopher Wood, Val Guest / Director: Val Guest / Producer: Greg Smith | |
| Type: Sex Comedy | Running Time: 86 mins |
| Timothy Lea gets a job as an apprentice in his brother-in-law Sid's window cleaning firm. His eagerness to help his customers, especially the young female ones, results in various sexual escapades. And in a running strand throughout the film he is dating a pretty young policewoman and is all set to marry her by the movie's end until misfortune strikes him on his big day. | |
| Comment: An unfairly berated film comedy that is actually well-made and shows its imitators how it should be done. At the end you really feel sorry for Timmy when he misses his big day through sheer bad luck. | |
| Starring: | Robin Askwith (as Timothy Lea), Anthony Booth (as Sid) |
| Featuring: | Sheila White (as Tim's sister/Sid's wife), Dandy Nichols as (Tim's mother), Bill Maynard (as Tim's father), Linda Hayden (as Tim's policewoman girlfriend) |
| Star-Turns: | Richard Wattis, John Le Mesurier, Joan Hickson |
| Starlets: | Katya Wyeth, Anita Graham, Christine Donna, Sue Longhurst, Olivia Munday, Judy Matheson, Elaine Baillie, Andee Cromarty, Anika Pavel, Carole Augustine, Jeannie Collings, Claire Russell, Jo Peters, Monika Ringwald, Porjai Nicholas, Jennifer Westbrook, and:- Glenda Allen, Ava Cadell, Zoe Hendry, Petula Noble (as Naked College Girls - although there were five and one was not seen naked - unknown which) |
| NOTES: | |
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This was the first in what became a series of four films all starring Robin Askwith as the same character in the same family set-up and with the same set of supporting actors playing his family (except for his mother who was played by Dandy Nicholls in this one and by Doris Hare in the other three). The next film in the series was Confessions of a Pop Performer (1975). |
| Connecting Rooms (1970) | Previous Next |
| Writer/Director: Franklin Gollings / Producer: Harry Field | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 111 mins |
| A slightly dishevelled man in his 50s called James Wallraven takes a room in a low-rent boarding house in London. He is polite but sparse in his conversation with the landlady and clearly would prefer some time to himself. He is given a room on the top floor next to a room occupied by a woman cellist. His longed for solitude is soon compromised however when he discovers that his room and hers have a connecting door that has no lock which is prone to swing open in a breeze. When this first happens he is obliged to be sociable and discovers the woman's name is Wanda Fleming. She is a friendly and outgoing woman, also in her 50s who is usually adept at drawing the most reticent individual into conversation - but she finds him in no mood for chat and he withdraws back to his room at the earliest of opportunities claiming tiredness.
Wanda is good friends with another boarder who shares her easy line of chat. He is a much younger man called Mickey Hollister who is a budding songwriter hoping to break into the pop industry. Despite their disparate ages the two of them have a ready line in friendly companionable banter as he tells her what is going on in his life. Wanda herself is a cellist. She regularly practices in her room and most evenings goes out to play at a top London theatre. She lives alone, never having married after the love of her life and intended husband was killed during the war. The above introduces the characters from the two separate plotlines linked by their connection to Wanda and although the stories are to a degree intermeshed it is easier to summarise them if they are unravelled and described separately. The James Wallraven story is clearly the major story but sufficient time is given over to the other story to make it more than just a minor subplot. Mickey Hollister Mickey gave up a paid job to try his luck at song writing and is always low on funds. When he hears that French pop singing sensation Claudia Fouchet is in town to do a concert he knows that if he can get her to record one of his songs it would launch his career. He tries to get to see her but she is too tired so he blags his way into her hotel room and tries to impress her with his barefaced approach backed up with an easy-going show of self-confidence. She allows him to take her out on a few dates although this upsets his girlfriend Jean even though he tries to explain to her it is just business. Mickey needs to maintain a certain lifestyle and so he begins to exploit the friendship he has engendered with Wanda back at his lodgings. She is a lonely woman who likes the company of others and when Mickey starts paying her compliments and appears to be taking a romantic interest in her she is flattered and wants to help him. But he soon starts to abuse this and manipulate her feelings for him by indicating she should demonstrate her love by buying him expensive gifts with her nest egg savings. Eventually Wanda discovers he has been taking her for a ride and shuts him out of her life, Jean has left him for his best friend, and Claudia leaves town without showing any interest in his song. James Wallraven James was until recently a teacher at a public boys school in Devon. He has left under a cloud of deep disgrace and the shame that he feels has led him to this backwater lodgings to keep a low-profile where he hopes to start anew. He does not feel sociable and a chatty neighbour was the last thing he wanted when he first arrived. He tries for other teaching jobs but word has quickly spread around the scholastic profession and he finds there is a stigma attached to his name that no one wants to be associated with. Unable to find any other work he gets a job as a janitor in an art college although he maintains to Wanda the fiction that he is in London on a research assignment for his school. Wanda soon realises that James has issues and is keeping something hidden which he finds very painful to talk about that is impairing his normally affable nature. But she is an understanding and patient woman and over time he begins to trust her and she finds out more... At his school there had been one particular boy called Geller who was very bright whom James gave special attention to, especially since Geller's highly sensitive nature meant he was always being picked upon by other boys jealous of his intelligence. There was also another schoolmaster called Stockdale whom James discovered had an unsavoury liking for young boys and who made overtures to James thinking he was similarly inclined because of his fostering of Geller. But James quickly put him right on the matter and left it at that. However to protect himself Stockdale started to spread untrue rumours about James' sexual preferences and when the headmaster caught James putting a friendly arm around a sobbing Geller after he had suffered a bout of bullying, the gesture was misunderstood and James was quietly told it would be best if he resigned at the end of term. And when Stockdale committed suicide and left a note naming James in his confession this was soon amended to instant dismissal. Although all the allegations were entirely false James had no way of proving it and has been living with the shame heaped upon him by the belief of everyone that he was some sort of pervert. James finds Wanda very sympathetic and she believes his story and forgives him his little white lies about doing research. For as James soon discovers she has told a few white lies about herself too and this helps her empathise with the need to maintain ones pride. He is grateful for all her kindness and a bond of understanding seems to have grown between them so he asks if he can take her to dinner and perhaps go to see her perform in one of her concerts beforehand. She is initially coy about him seeing her perform but finally agrees and tells him which theatre to come to. But when he arrives at the theatre he finds she is playing her cello as a busker for the audience as they queue to go in. He doesn't mind one bit and as we leave them they are walking off to go to dinner in what looks to be the beginnings of a new romance. | |
| Starring: | Michael Redgrave (as Professor James Wallraven), Bette Davis (as Wanda Fleming), Alexis Kanner (as Mickey Hollister), Olga Georges-Picot (as Claudia Fouchet, French pop singer) |
| Featuring: | Kay Walsh (as Mrs Brent, lodgings house landlady), Gabrielle Drake (as Jean Hallum, Mickey's girlfriend), Mark Jones (as Johnny, Mickey's mechanic friend), Richard Wyler (as Dick Grayson, Claudia's manager), Leo Genn (as Dr Norman, friend and ex-colleague of James) |
| Familiar Faces: | Brian Wilde (as Scholastic agency manager) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on The Cellist, a play by Marion Hart |
| Cool It Carol! (1970) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Murray Smith / Director/Producer: Pete Walker | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 97 mins |
| Joe Sickles is a small town butcher's assistant who dreams of a better life in London. To impress his 17-year-old schoolgirl girlfriend Carol Thatcher, he brags about a job offer he has had in the motor trade up there. But Carol who works part-time as a petrol-pump attendant has secretly had similar ideas about getting away from her humdrum life and pursuing her dream of becoming a model. She recently won a local beauty contest and fancies her chances. So when Carol embraces Joe's throwaway comment of travelling to London he is caught up in her enthusiasm unable to back down without appearing foolish and so quits his job at the butchers to go with her.
They arrive in London with little money and stay at a cheap hotel. The next day he makes a show of going to his "new job" but really goes out looking for one - with no success. Carol, meanwhile, has more luck. She visits several modelling agencies and although they can't take her on without a portfolio they express interest if she can get some photos done and give her a contact through which she eventually meets Tommy Sanders who persuades her to pose for some test shots in the nude so he can show them to a high-profile men's magazine - but she won't have any money until they make a decision. Several days go by and Joe and Carol have spent all the money they brought with them and are penniless - so for a laugh he suggests she could make some easy-money by sleeping with men. So she nervously tries going up to men in the street and propositioning them which only results in scaring most of them off. But one man who notices what she is doing and sees an opportunity invites her back to his flat to have sex with her - Joe goes as well to chaperone her and has an agonising wait outside in the next room as he hears them "at it" in the bedroom. The man arranges for her to come back at the same time the next day which they agree to. Next day she arrives and the man has lined up a string of punters all eager to pay to have sex with her although he wants a commission for getting her the "business". She goes along with it but afterwards feels so ashamed and vows never to do anything like that again. That evening Carol and Joe go to a night-club and they are approached by a man who offers them both some money to appear in a blue movie short which they reluctantly decide to go along with as they desperately need the money. From here on their fortunes dramatically change. Her modelling career takes off with Tommy Sanders in both glamour and fashion work - she gets offers for her services as a high-class call girl and Joe acts as her manager to field all the work she is being offered. They are now flush with money and hold an expensive party at a rented mansion to drum up more business and take thousands of pounds of bookings in a single night. Carol is on the verge of being a huge success but then they both realise that they are no longer happy and decide what they really want is their old lives back. So they turn their backs on the glitz and glamour and return to their sleepy town and resume their old jobs keeping their fleeting encounter with the high life their own personal secret. | |
| Comment: A good story with excellent performances from the two leads. The only thing I didn't find clear was the time-span the story took place in - was it just a few weeks or several months or more. | |
| Starring: | Robin Askwith (as Joe), Janet Lynn (as Carol) |
| Featuring: | Jess Conrad, Derek Aylward (as Tommy Sanders), Kenneth Hendel, Stephen Bradley |
| Familiar Faces: | Pete Murray (The DJ as a party guest) |
| Starlets: | Claire Gordon, Nicola Austin, Valerie St. John |
| The Corpse (1970) | Previous Next |
| aka: Crucible of Horror | |
| Writer: Olaf Pooley / Director: Viktors Ritelis / Producer: Gabrielle Beaumont | |
| Type: Chiller | Running Time: 88 mins |
| The Eastwood family's domestic life is dominated by the father, Walter, who keeps tight order on his wife and daughter's activities. Edith, his wife, is on medication for nervous depression but knows the boundaries well enough that she can usually placate her husband; Rupert, his adult son, is more fairly treated and works alongside his father at an insurance firm, although he never stands up to his father or questions the bullying brutality that his sixteen year old sister Jane is subjected to. Jane is forever testing her father's short patience - she is never given pocket money, all her personal letters are vetted by her father and he regularly beats her with a stick for some wrong doing - so much so that Rupert and Edith have to block out the sound of her cries of pain with loud music.
After one such vicious beating Edith casually tells her daughter Jane that she has decided to kill him and together they hatch a plan. That weekend when Walter travels alone to the family's country cottage for a shooting break, the two women secretly follow after dark. They drug Walter with an overdose of Edith's medication which is sure to kill him and arrange things to make it appear like suicide and then return home leaving him to be discovered. But when no phone call about the "tragedy" is forthcoming they are forced to travel to the cottage acting the worried relatives to "discover" him themselves - but find no body! Then looking round they find his body has been put in a crate in the garage - but by whom? They load the crate onto their car and take it to wasteland and dump it down into a quarry. Back home Edith's medication has run out because she used it all to drug Walter and she is starting to get a recurrence of the problem the drugs were supposed to suppress and is having hallucinogenic nightmares - and when she wakes in the night and gets up she finds Walter's body has been brought into the house! Then all of a sudden things are back to normal - Walter is alive and they are all sitting at the breakfast table - with Edith looking very gaunt and pale - and it seems the whole death plot was her fantasy of what she'd like to do if she had the nerve. | |
| Comment: Up until the conclusion it is quite tense and intriguing but the ending does seems a bit of a disappointing cop-out when the viewer has been wondering who the third-party is that is continually moving the husband's body. | |
| Starring: | Michael Gough (as Walter Eastwood), Yvonne Mitchell (Edith, wife), Sharon Gurney (as Jane, daughter), Simon Gough (as Rupert, son) |
| Featuring: | Olaf Pooley (as holiday cottage neighbour), David Butler (as friend of Walter) |
| NOTES: | |
• |
Sharon Gurney receives an "introducing" credit |
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The title on the version reviewed here was Crucible of Horror which is the American title for this film. |
| Corridors of Blood (1958) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Jean Scott Rogers / Director: Robert Day / Producers: John Croydon, Charles Vetter Jnr | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 86 mins |
| Set in 1840s London before the discovery of anaesthetic when essential surgery had to be carried out with the patient fully conscious and in terrible agony throughout. The accepted medical wisdom of the time is that pain and the knife were inseparable, but one eminent and compassionate surgeon called Dr Thomas Bolton detests the savagery of it and believes there must be a way to lull a patient into a sustained period of unconsciousness so they won't feel a thing. His principal is sound but his peers consider there to be no way of achieving this ambition and so his efforts are scorned and he is given no encouragement.
Dr Bolton therefore decides to conduct experiments upon himself at home in his private laboratory as he mixes chemicals to try and produce a pain-numbing concoction. He takes copious notes as he inhales the different vapour mixtures he creates. Encouraged by early successes he organises a demonstration for his colleagues with a volunteer patient - but this goes wrong and things descend into farce when the patient wakes up mid-operation and Bolton's laudable objective is further dismissed as unachievable. Bolton knows he is on the right track however and just needs to find a stronger formulation. When he tries a mixture laced with a tincture of opium he descends into light-headed giddiness and wanders off into the London streets and finds his way to the local tavern run by Black Ben and his band of ragamuffins. They know of Dr Bolton from his charity work where he operates a free dispensary once a week to the poor. They have previously successfully conned the good doctor into signing false death certificates when he was in full charge of his faculties. But now he is clearly suffering from impaired faculties they find it easy to pickpocket his invaluable notebook and then demand further co-operation for its safe return. The ruffians use the certificates to sell newly murdered bodies to the teaching hospitals who are willing to pay good money for their use in anatomy study if they come with the appropriate paperwork. Each time after Bolton gets home he remains unaware of anything he has done whilst under the influence and thinks he is getting close to the right mixture. But his normal work as a surgeon is suffering and his son Jonathan who works alongside him as a doctor thinks he has become addicted to the concoction of vapours he is experimenting with and begs him to stop. Meanwhile Bolton's superiors think his declining mental health is due to work-related exhaustion and decide he needs to take a break and suspend him from duties. This cuts Bolton off from the supply of drugs he needs to create more vapour and so addicted is he that he makes a deal with Black Ben to sign more certificates if his men help him break into the hospital dispensary to get more chemicals. This raid results in the death of the dispensary assistant and Bolton lays low in Ben's tavern traumatised that he has become involved in such criminal activity and finally accepting that Jonathan was right about his addiction. The police have reason to suspect Ben and his men for the dispensary murder and raid the tavern. Bolton's usefulness to the ruffians has ended and he is mortally stabbed but as he dies he implores his son Jonathan to safeguard his research notes and continue his work because he knows he was close to his goal of painless surgery. And in a postscript we see Jonathan some years(?) later carrying out an operation with the patient fully anaesthetised and a display cabinet posthumously honouring the pioneering work of Thomas Bolton. | |
| Starring: | Boris Karloff (as Dr Thomas Bolton), Francis Matthews (as Jonathan Bolton, Dr Bolton's son), Betta St John (as Susan, Dr Bolton's niece and Jonathan's girlfriend), Francis De Wolff (as Black Ben), Adrienne Corri (as Rachel, Black Ben's wife), Christopher Lee (as Resurrection Joe, Ben's chief ruffian) |
| Featuring: | Finlay Currie (as Superintendent Matheson), Basil Dignam (as Hospital Chairman), Frank Pettingell (as Blount, sceptical doctor at hospital), Carl Bernard (as Ned The Crow, Rogues' lookout), Yvonne Warren (as Rosa, girl in tavern) |
| NOTES: | |
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Made in Black and White. |
| Corruption (1967) | Previous Next |
| Writers: Donald Ford, Derek Ford / Director: Robert Hartford-Davis / Producer: Peter Newbrook | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 87 mins |
| Sir John Rowan is a skilled and accomplished surgeon who returns home weary after a long but successful five-hour operation ready to fall asleep in his armchair when his young fiancée Lynn calls to remind him about the party he has promised to go to with her. He does not want to let her down so after a few brief moments to rest his eyes in quiet contemplation he leaves to meet up with her.
He arrives at the party which is being hosted by fashion photographer Mike Orme. Lynn is already there and welcomes Sir John and introduces him to her friends. She is a successful model and it was with her face that Mike made a name for himself. Sir John is somewhat older than the other guests who are all young people enjoying themselves dancing and he feels rather out of place. When Mike sets up an impromptu modelling session with Lynn and encourages her to adopt seductive poses while sitting on the floor, Sir John takes exception and tries to stop proceedings. He and Mike have a tussle for possession of the camera and in the struggle a spotlight gets knocked and it falls over onto Lynn horribly burning the right side of her face. She is taken to Sir John's hospital where his colleague Doctor Steve Harris manages to save her sight but can do nothing about the scarring. Lynn is in utter despair about her lost looks and contemplates suicide. Her sister Val has come to be with her and tries to talk about the promising grafting techniques possible although they both know these are only partially successful and involve a very painful and lengthy processes. Meanwhile Sir John, who blames himself for his fiancée's situation, has abandoned his normal work and thrown himself into researching ways in which living tissue can be restored without the pain of grafting. He thinks that ancient knowledge understood by the Egyptians combined with modern techniques might hold the answer. John eventually believes he has worked out a way to control the endocrine system to promote tissue growth but needs a donor sample - so he goes to the mortuary and against all the rules of medical ethics removes the pituitary gland from the head of deceased young woman. Dr Harris catches him at it and tells him he'll say nothing this time but if it happens again he will have no choice but to report him to the medical council. John carries out the operation on Lynn's face injecting her with the hormone fluid extracted from the gland and treating the scars with a finely tuned laser scalpel. The operation is a complete success and Lynn is her old self again with no sign of any scarring evident. Even Dr Harris is amazed when he comes round to pick up Val for a date. John and Lynn decide to go away on a three week cruise to celebrate - but half-way into the holiday they return home and she is in floods of tears because the scarring has returned. Sir John now believes that where he went wrong was by using a dead sample and needs to get hold of a gland from a freshly deceased corpse. He goes to Soho and chooses a flat of a random prostitute and then when alone with her he kills her and removes her head and rushes back to extract the gland and perform the operation again. It is once more a success although Dr Harris is perplexed at how Sir John managed to accomplish it again - but knows he did not raid the mortuary this time so assumes he found an alternative method. John is very tired now and Lynn suggests they go away to their holiday cottage in Seaford for a few weeks. But after a while even though the effects are much longer-lasting than the first time the first signs of tissue re-degeneration are beginning to be detectable and Lynn is insistent that he do it again before it becomes visible to the naked eye. But John realises now that there will be no end to this and every month or so he will have to murder a girl to treat Lynn. The first girl was a prostitute and so he was able to justify killing her but he can't find it in himself to murder innocent girls at random. But Lynn is insistent and threatens to go to the police and expose him if he doesn't help her again. They see a lone girl called Terry on the beach and invite her to stay with them with the intention of murdering her. She seems perfect as she tells them she is on the road just travelling. It turns out though that she is part of a gang of thieves and it is her job to get inside and case the joint - but she gets spooked by the way Sir John looks at her and makes off. So Sir John murders a random girl on a train and brings her head back to take the gland from. But then Terry returns persuaded by her gang leader to try again and she sees the head and runs. Sir John chases her down onto the beach and has to kill her to keep her quiet. The headless girl on the train makes the news and Dr Harris figures out what is going on and he and Val head down to Seaford to put a stop to it. Meanwhile, just as Sir John is preparing to operate again on Lynn in his private operating theatre in the cottage, Terry's gang invade their property and demand money and jewellery. As things come to a climax in the operating theatre Lynn turns the laser scalpel on to full power and it sends its destructive beam around the room killing the gang leader as she intended - but then the laser head goes out of control as it swings freely around on its gantry arm killing Lynn too. Then with the most unfortunate twist of timing Dr Harris and Val arrive into the situation and are also killed by it. And then as Sir John reaches up to try and turn it off he is also killed by the destructive beam. Epilogue. Sir John is back at the party just before his fiancée's accident. After he had spoken to her on the phone he had closed his eyes and had momentarily dozed off dreaming the entire series of events that followed. But then a sinister sense of deja-vu comes over him as events start taking the same course as in his dream... (freeze frame ending on his face as it dawns on him what is going to happen). | |
| Starring: | Peter Cushing (as Sir John Rowan), Sue Lloyd (as Lynn Nolan), Noel Trevarthen (as Dr Steve Harris), Kate O'Mara (as Val Nolan, Lynn's sister) |
| Featuring: | Wendy Varnals (as Terry), Billy Murray (as Rik, gang member and Terry's husband), Phillip Manikum (as Georgie, gang leader), David Lodge (as Groper, deranged gang member) |
| Starlets: | Vanessa Howard (as Kate, dim model at party), Jan Waters (as Prostitute at flat), Alexandra Dane (as Sandy, gang member), Valerie Van Ost (as Woman murdered on train) |
| NOTES: | |
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There is a continental version of this film called Laser Killer with extra/alternative scenes that contains additional violence and some nudity. The version reviewed here was the standard UK version. |
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Although I've categorised it as "Horror" it is hybrid Medical/Crime/Serial Killer drama but the reason for the killings is semi-fantastical so "horror" seems borderline apt. |
| Countess Dracula (1971) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Jeremy Paul / Director: Peter Sasdy / Story/Producer: Alexander Paal | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 89 mins |
| In 16th/17th century Europe the elderly Countess Elisabeth Nadasdy has just buried her late husband and returned to her castle for the reading of his will. The Count provided appropriate bequests for his favoured advisers including Lieutenant Imre Toth, the handsome son of one of the Count's best friend, who is given the stables. Countess Elisabeth eyes Lt Toth with interested eyes but resignedly knows that her decrepit looks would of be of no interest to him even though she was a beauty in her youth. They had been expecting the Count and Countess' 19-year-old daughter Illona to be there but her travel was delayed and she is not now expected until the next day. She has been in Vienna since the age of 6 where as a child she was sent to avoid the dreaded Turks.
Other members of the castle staff include castle steward Captain Dobi who has for 20 long years held a torch for the Countess and has waited patiently for the day when she might become free to be with him; and Master Fabio, a learned man who is delighted to be bequeathed the Count's extensive collection of rare books. The remainder of the estate is divided equally between the Count's wife and daughter. The Countess retires to her rooms to take a bath feeling somewhat aggrieved because the main bequest was not to her alone and takes her anger out on a servant girl - striking her so she bleeds. Some of the girl's blood sprays onto the side of the Countess' face and as she rubs it off she notices a peculiar effect - that whole side of her face has become wrinkle free and returned to the soft smooth appearance of her youth. The Countess is amazed and is so desperate to regain her lost youth that she kills the girl and bathes in her blood to see what effect it has. She becomes young again in face, body and figure and reveals her transformation to both her personal companion Julie and Captain Dobi who are stunned. But she would be unable to explain the change to anyone she didn't trust so she devises the idea that she should pose as her own daughter Illona who everyone knows is expected to arrive soon and she charges Captain Dobi with intercepting the real Illona and holding her somewhere out of the way. Because no one has seen the adult Illona they will not realise a substitution has been made and the astonishing similarity to the way the countess used to look when younger is easily explainable as a natural family resemblance. The Countess then holds a dinner for her staff and Lt Toth in honour of her "daughter's" homecoming although the Countess "sends word" that she is too overcome with emotion to attend herself. Young Elisabeth (as Illona) is a hit and elderly Master Fabio is amazed at how one so young can be so mature of wit and bearing and astonished that the young girl he has not seen since she was six resembles so strongly her mother when she was of a similar age. After dinner "Illona" avails herself of Lt Toth's company and charms him with her beauty and grace - by the end of the evening they are kissing and arranging another assignation the next day. But at that meeting "Illona" has to suddenly leave when she sees that her youthfulness is fading and realises that the magical effect of the maid's blood is only temporary. Countess Elisabeth now old once more is determined to try again and kills a gypsy girl for her blood which again restores her youth. She and Lt Toth have another tryst and he proposes marriage and she accepts. Captain Dobi is appalled at the idea knowing that he will never have her himself if she remarries. He acts supportive though and takes Toth to a tavern and gets him drunk and pairs him up with a prostitute and sneaks them both back into the castle. Then he shows the now old-again Elisabeth what her brave young lieutenant is up to. But Elisabeth realises that Dobi has manufactured the situation and simply uses the prostitute herself killing her for her blood. But this time the transformation does not work and she doesn't understand why. Master Fabio has the answer in one of his rare books - he has been observing recent events and has divined what is going on. The blood needs to be that of a virgin and the prostitute clearly was not such a girl - previous victims had been virgins by chance. Elisabeth corrects that mistake and selects a virgin next time. All the deaths and disappearances are starting to mount up and the townsfolk are becoming increasingly agitated. The chief bailiff orders all women servants away from the castle until the killer is found. This depletes Elisabeth's source of blood and although currently young again she tells Captain Dobi to bring someone to the castle to be ready for when she needs her. In an action of spite Dobi brings to the castle the real Illona, the Countess' daughter, from where she had been being held captive. Captain Dobi also reveals the true nature of "Illona" to Lt Toth and he rejects her appalled at what she has done. But then the Countess shows him the dead body of the prostitute he was with and tells him it was he who killed her in his drunken state and she has been covering up for him. Toth cannot remember if this was true or not - so he is forced by threat of being branded a murderer to proceed with the marriage. The marriage ceremony begins between "Illona" and Lt Toth - meanwhile personal companion Julie who was once the child Illona's nanny cannot bear to think of harm befalling her and helps her escape the room in which she is being kept locked up. But Illona is intrigued as to who is getting married and goes to see. During the ceremony young Elisabeth starts to become old again and she panics and sees Illona and tries to attack her for her blood in front of everyone - Lt Toth tries to stop her but he is accidentally killed by her in the struggle. Now old-again Elisabeth is arrested and put into a dungeon and, as the end-credits roll, is awaiting the arrival of the hangman for her execution as the baying crowd jeer at her for the evil murderous woman she was. | |
| Starring: | Ingrid Pitt (as Countess Elisabeth Nadasdy), Sandor Elès (as Lt Imre Toth), Nigel Green (Captain Dobi, Castle Steward), Maurice Denham (as Master Fabio, Castle Librarian) |
| Featuring: | Patience Collier (as Julie Szentes countesses personal companion), Peter Jeffrey (Captain Balogh, Chief Bailiff/lawman, Lesley-Anne Down (as Ilona, Countess' Daughter), Leon Lissek (as Bailiff Sergeant), Jessie Evans (as Teri's Mother) |
| Starlets: | Andrea Lawrence (as Ziza, prostitute), Susan Brodrick (as Teri, Countess' Chambermaid), Nike Arrighi (as Gypsy Girl) |
| NOTES: | |
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Despite the title there is no actual link to the Dracula legend in this film and none of the characters are even vampires. The only time "Countess Dracula" is mentioned is at the end when the villainess is being called vile names by the crowd as she awaits execution and that was one of the names someone called her as a throw-away insult. |
| Country Dance (1970) | Previous Next |
| aka: Brotherly Love | |
| Writer: James Kennaway / Director: J. Lee Thompson / Producer: Robert Emmett Ginna | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 112 mins |
| Hilary and Charles are a brother and sister who live together on a farm in Scotland. Charles is Sir Charles Ferguson, a landowner who is prone to wild fancy and has an overbearing, larger than life personality. Hilary is married but separated from Douglas Dow who now works for a nearby landowner. Douglas and Hilary's marriage suffered because of her devotion to her brother whom she calls "Pink". Charles is unable or unwilling to let his sister lead a life of her own and there are strong hints that when younger the siblings had a sexual relationship in a barn while watching the bullock at work and that Charles has never properly gotten over her in order to find a wife of his own. Charles has little or no sense of responsibility that befits his position and has been accused of having a low moral fibre and is perceived by others as being lazy.
Although they no longer have a sexual relationship the siblings are still very close and often share childish moments of playfulness together - but Hilary is worn out by her brother's reliance on her and wants to break free and have her own life back. Charles resists her efforts by becoming more outrageous and irresponsible that she does not see how she can possibly leave him to live by himself and must forever be his keeper. He spent some time once before in a psychotherapy centre and Hilary makes tentative plans for him to spend another period there. But Charles mental condition worsens, not helped by his reliance on alcohol and drugs, and he makes an unsuccessful attempt at suicide which only results in him blowing away part of an ear. He deteriorates so fast that Hilary fears he has gone to pieces and she turns to her estranged husband Douglas for help and he makes the only arrangements possible and ones which she knew would be necessary but had been unable to bring herself to make - to have her brother committed to a mental hospital - and after agonising over her decision she signs the committal papers. | |
| Starring: | Peter O'Toole (as Sir Charles Ferguson), Susannah York (as Hilary Dow), Michael Craig (as Douglas Dow) |
| Featuring: | Harry Andrews (as Brigadier Crieff, Douglas' employer), Cyril Cusack (as Dr Maitland, Psychotherapy Centre), Judy Cornwell (as Rosie, farm girl with baby), Brian Blessed (as Jock Baird, policeman) |
| Familiar Faces: | Frances de la Tour (as District Nurse, cameo, barely see her face) |
| Starlets: | Rona Newton-John (as Miss Scott), Bernadette Gallagher (as Ina) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on both James Kennaway's play called Country Dance and his novel titled Household Ghosts. |
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The version reviewed had the title Brotherly Love. |
| A Couple of Beauties (1972) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Bernie Friedburg / Director/Producer: Francis Searle | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 27 mins |
| While working in London as a barman Bernie Lewis witnesses his club manager being shot dead by a protection racketeer called Ronaldo. Bernie quickly scarpers and heads off to Manchester where his friend and agent Tim Baxter is based. Ronaldo and his henchman Max discover where Bernie has gone and follow.
Bernie is in fear of his life and so Tim suggests that he "hide" by utilising his skills as a former drag-act artiste and pretend he is a woman. Bernie becomes "Bunny" and gets a job at a nightclub standing in for an absentee member of a group of all-girl musicians. He has to share a bedroom with two of the girls without them realising he is really a man and also contend with a over-amorous club manager who fancies his chances with "her". Eventually Ronaldo and Max realise how Bernie has eluded them and try to nab him at the club - but luckily an off-duty police inspector is on-hand and arrests the villains. | |
| Starring: | Bunny Lewis (as Bernie Lewis), Tim Barrett (as Tim Baxter, Bernie's agent), James Beck (as Sidney, Manchester club manager), Pat Coombs (as Sidney's wife) |
| Featuring: | (characters not known) John Scarborough, Bill Pilkington, Rex Arundel, Robert Morton, Knox Crighton, Jackie Carlton, Tommy Mann, John Robbins, Allan Deutrom, Robert West, Norman McGlen |
| Familiar Faces: | Bernard Manning (as Himself/comedian, [cameo, billed as "Special Guest Star"]), also similarly billed was comedian Colin Crompton although he was not such an enduring personality |
| Starlets: | Valerie Leigh, Liz Lax, Beverley Stevens, Stephanie Waite, Sue Dexter (in any order:- London Waitress; Gloria, girl band manager; Joyce and Audrey, Bunny's girl band roommates; Jenny, Tim's secretary) |
| NOTES: | |
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It is a slight crime drama with a few comedic elements, but I have classed it as a "Comedy" rather than a "Crime Drama" so as not to lend it too much gravitas |
| Writers: Aben Kandel, Herman Cohen / Director: Freddie Francis / Producer: Herman Cohen | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 90 mins |
| An antique shop owner called Neal Mottram is a practitioner of black magic rites. He worships an idol of the African god Chuku that he keeps in his basement workshop. He has regular black masses with some other devotees and they perform symbolic human sacrifices in which a volunteer lets some of their own blood although the group fall short of any actual death sacrifices. Following one such coven meeting when all the worshipers have departed one former expelled member called Muriel Sharp demands from Mottram reinstatement and to take her rightful place as the head of the coven which she believes he has usurped. They struggle and she falls upon the symbolic trident held by the idol statue and is killed. Mottram bundles her body in a carpet and disposes of her in some woodland.
Mottram's shop is in severe financial difficulties with bills he cannot pay and little chance of a turnaround. He prays to the idol for help and hopes the earlier sacrifice of Muriel pleased it. Later on his shop assistant Ronnie suggests they could sell an old antique desk which is currently not on offer since it is being functionally used in the shop. Mottram agrees that it might help and starts to clear out his belongings when he discovers a hidden compartment within it full of gold coins worth £1000. It is sufficient to allow Mottram to pay off all his bills and help the shop to survive - he puts the good fortune down to Chuku and its pleasure at the human sacrifice. Ronnie has no belief in the god but knows what his boss is up to. Mottram needs more good fortune for his expansion plans and decides to try again. He uses his masculine charm to pick up a woman in a bar who is a foreign traveller with no local family ties and takes her back to his place above the shop for some sex. Later he shows her the idol in the basement which he tells her is his love god and then proceeds to murder her. He makes Ronnie help him dispose of the body. Not long after that a couple of experts come into the shop and identify a couple of Ming vases, previously thought to be reproductions, to be the genuine article and buy them from the shop for £4000. Mottram wants more and knows he is due an inheritance from his elderly aunt when she eventually passes away. So he decides to hasten matters and organises himself an elaborate alibi - part of which involves a former girlfriend called Dolly whom he drugs as they are going to bed together and then leaves in the night to murder his aunt before returning to the bed before Dolly awakens so she can tell the police he was with her all night. It all works perfectly and he inherits a fortune from his aunt's estate which he puts down to the protective presence of Chuku helping him. But the police are getting suspicious of all the recent murders in which his name keeps cropping up in some way and they try and break down his apparently watertight alibi. When Dolly tells them that one of the reasons she broke up with Mottram a few years ago was his bizarre interest in black magic, the police decide that is sufficient to put a watch on his shop. Mottram now becomes bold and sneaks out of the shop under the very noses of the police spotter to murder a prostitute. Ronnie has become fed up with all the lying and covering up for the greedy Mottram who always tells him that Chuku will protect them from police discovery - but Ronnie wants to know when the cycle of sacrifice and reward will ever end. They fight and the police storm the shop cornering Mottram in his basement as he tries to fend them off with an antique axe. But he is shot by an armed officer and as he dies he declares to Chuku that he is the final sacrifice. | |
| Starring: | Jack Palance (as Neal Mottram), Martin Potter (as Ronnie, shop assistant) |
| Featuring: | Diana Dors (as Dolly Newman), Michael Jayston (as Det Sgt Wall), Trevor Howard (as Supt Bellamy), Edith Evans (as Aunt Louise), Julie Ege (as Helena, Scandinavian tourist), Percy Herbert (as Detective Russet), Kathleen Byron (as Muriel Sharp) |
| Starlets: | Suzy Kendall (as Sally, a prostitute), Venecia Day (as Coven dancer) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the novel Infernal Idol by Henry Seymour. |
| Writer/Producer: Michael Carreras / Director: Don Chaffey | |
| Type: Adventure | Running Time: 90 mins |
| In prehistoric times a tribe of primitive hunters have to abandon their secure cave dwellings when it is destroyed in a volcanic eruption and earthquake which sends them fleeing for their lives. They are forced to embark on a trek across the desert regions to seek out a new place to call home. After several days they encounter another tribe who have predominantly fair hair in contrast to their own dark hair. The two tribes merge and the leaders gift each other with a young woman taken from their own tribes.
The 'Dark' leader's new wife soon becomes pregnant and gives birth to twin boys although she dies in childbirth. The boys have different hair colours - Fair and Dark. And born at the same time to a different mother was a baby girl - all three of these children grow up together the same age ... Moving forward to their teenage years:- The 'Dark' boy is a strong and ruthless hunter displaying a cruel streak as he hunts and kills animals for practice and fun - whereas the 'Fair' boy uses cunning to trap the animals and then let them go afterwards. The same-age girl who forever remains silent is bullied by the 'Dark' boy and when the 'Fair' boy tries to stop him it is clear that the 'Dark' boy is the stronger of the two and easily bests his brother in a fight. By the time they are young adults:- the 'Dark' brother is still throwing his weight around with the 'Dumb' girl but now he is interested in other things from her too - she runs off and is caught by Marauders. Her tribe follow to rescue her and have a pitched battle with the Marauder tribe. The Marauder leader is killed and his woman becomes the woman of the 'Fair' brother. While out hunting the brothers' father is killed - since he was their tribe's leader the mantle must be passed on. The tribe's wise woman selects the cleverer 'Fair' brother to be the new leader but his 'Dark' brother objects and insists they fight for the right in a battle to the death - it is a battle of savagery versus cunning but in the end the 'Fair' brother wins out - but he refuses to kill his 'Dark' brother and instead casts him out. The 'Dark' brother is after revenge for his humiliation and mounts an ambush while the tribe are out hunting in the forest - he abducts the 'Fair' man's woman forcing his brother to come after him to rescue her and fight again. He takes her up to the top of a cliff where the 'Fair' brother follows and they have another death-fight. This time the 'Dark' brother appears to be winning - but as he prepares to make the killing blow upon his helpless brother he is stabbed in the back by the 'Dumb' girl who followed them and he falls to his death. | |
| Starring: | Brian O'Shaughnessy (as The Father [Mak]), Rosalie Crutchley (as The Old Crone, a wise woman), Julie Ege (as The Girl [Nala], the 'Fair' man's woman) (as Adults) Tony Bonner (as The 'Fair' Boy [Toomak]), Robert John (as The 'Dark' Boy [Rool]), Marcia Fox (as The Dumb Girl [The Mute Girl]) |
| Featuring: | (as Teenagers) Gerard Bonthuys (as The Young 'Fair' Boy), Hans Kiesouw (as The Young 'Dark' Boy), Josje Kiesouw (as The Young Dumb Girl) (also featuring) Don Leonard (as The Old Leader), Sue Wilson (as The Mother [Noo], mother of the fair and dark boy twins), Beverley Blake (The Young Lover [The Young Mistress], girl), Doon Baide (as The Young Lover, boy), Ken Hare (as The Leader of the Fair Tribe [The Honest Leader]) |
| Starlets: | Rosita Moulan (as The Dancer) |
| NOTES: | |
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Julie Ege is the top billed star of the movie although she is not a hugely important character and does not come into the story until 53 minutes in. |
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Although the credits given on IMDB show some of the characters as having actual "names", the film's end credits do not use these names and instead give much more useful descriptive designations for each character. These character names are certainly not used in the dialogue because there is none other than grunting - so it is unclear where they originate from. In the above cast list I've used the actual end credits description [followed by what is shown on IMDB (if different) in square brackets]. |
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This is the third of three "primitive man" films made by Hammer although there are no continuing characters or situations that link them. This one differs however in that there is no dialogue at all other than basic guttural grunting. In the other films the characters had a rudimentary language by which they communicated perfectly adequately between themselves even though it was not comprehensible to the viewer. Also there are no dinosaurs in this movie just regular hunting animals and so of the three films this is the one that is more "realistic" and less fantastical. The other two films were One Million Years B.C. (1966) and When Dinosaurs Ruled the Earth (1970). |
| The Creeping Flesh (1973) | Previous Next |
| Writers: Peter Spenceley, Jonathan Rumbold / Director: Freddie Francis / Producer: Michael Redbourn | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 92 mins |
| In 1893, paleoanthropologist Emmanuel Hildern returns home to England after a twelve-month expedition to New Guinea searching for the remains of primitive man. He has brought back with him a specimen that he believes will be the scientific discovery of the century and win him the prestigious Richter Prize. Emmanuel's find is the complete skeleton of a humanoid but with a much a larger frame and head than that of a normal human. It would have towered over seven feet tall when alive. Furthermore this specimen was discovered at a much lower stratum of rock than previously unearthed Neanderthal remains, indicating it is far more ancient despite seeming to be a more advanced being.
Emmanuel becomes passionately absorbed in his work and his grown up daughter Penelope feels very neglected. She lives alone with her father ever since her mother died when she was a small child. She has had a very closeted upbringing in her father's care whom she knows dearly loves her despite his scientific preoccupations. Emmanuel does not like to talk to his daughter about his late wife Marguerite and keeps her old room locked and forbids Penelope to try and enter. Unknown to Penelope, Marguerite did not die those many years ago but had instead become afflicted with insanity and was committed to the Hildern Institute for Mental Disorders. The Institute's director is Emmanuel's half-brother James although the two of them are not close. They have a professional rivalry and both want to win the Richter Prize. Upon Emmanuel's return from Australia he learnt from James that Marguerite passed away during his absence. Emmanuel knows he can never now tell Penelope the truth after she has for so long believed her mother to be dead. Emmanuel also worries that the evil affliction that stripped away his dear wife's sanity might be hereditary and he has always sought to shield Penelope from any shocks that might unbalance her mind. James is conducting research at his institute into the reasons for madness. He believes that if he can find a way to artificially induce insanity then he will be a step closer to understanding how to cure it. But he is having no success with electrical stimulation and he finds it very frustrating that he is unable to make a breakthrough. James is a very dispassionate man who thinks only of his personal ambitions and treats his inmates like animals. Emmanuel decides to clean his New Guinean specimen and he begins applying a damp cloth to one of its fingers. To his utter astonishment the finger begins to re-grow its soft tissue and flesh. Emmanuel is appalled at this extraordinary phenomenon that defies nature and he hacks the finger away with a chisel lest the effect spread over the entire body. He examines the blood from the regenerated finger under a microscope and notices the blood cells appear unusually dark and aggressive. When Emmanuel adds a sample of his own blood to the slide, the irregular cells overpower and destroy the normal ones. Emmanuel studies a book on New Guinean superstitions and learns that the primitives have a legend that giants once walked their land. These giants represented pure evil and were only defeated after a titanic war. They had to be deeply buried for the legend tells that the giants had the ability to regenerate on contact with water. Emmanuel realises that is what happened here and he instinctively knows the blood from this finger is a distillation of evil in it purest form. Emmanuel believes that evil is a plague-like disease that is spread by infection, and that being the case it must be possible to cure it or immunize against it so that a person is proof from its effects for life. With this blood he has the chance to put his theory to the test. Emmanuel prepares a dilute serum of the evil blood and injects it into a laboratory monkey which in accordance with inoculation theory should immunise a patient from the full-blown pathogen by applying a mild form. As expected the monkey's blood produces antibodies which form a protective shell around its blood cells repelling attack by the irregular cells. Meanwhile Penelope has decided she at long last wants to know more about her mother and has managed to get into the locked bedroom. She is appalled when she learns from an old newspaper cutting that her father has been lying to her all these years and her mother was not dead, but had until recently been alive in an insane asylum. Penelope becomes very distressed and Emmanuel gets extremely worried that the shock may cause her to become affected by madness like her mother. Buoyed by his success with the monkey Emmanuel decides to use his serum to immunise Penelope and protect her from the onset of evil. He injects her with a dose telling her it is a sedative to help her rest. His only concern is for her welfare and he believes he has now protected her from all future harm. Next morning however Emmanuel is shocked to discover that the monkey had undergone a fit during the night and its blood has now been overpowered by the rogue cells. Furthermore Penelope is missing from her room and Emmanuel realises with dread that he has made the most awful miscalculation and Penelope has become endangered by his precipitate actions. Penelope has spent the night roaming the seedy parts of town visiting taverns and experiencing sensations of pleasure and excess she has never before known about. Her wild sensual behaviour brings her to the attention of predatory lotharios and when one gets too fresh with her she thinks nothing of stabbing him in the throat with a broken bottle. The tavern crowd turn on her and chase her down the street wanting to lynch her for her callous crime. She is eventually captured by the police and because she is exhibiting signs of madness she is taken directly to the Hildern Institute. James is astonished to see his niece brought in as an insane and decides not to admit her but return her to the care of his brother. But not before he examines her blood and sees how unusual it looks. He cannot fathom what could have caused such an extreme disorder in a previously healthy girl. James delivers Penelope to Emmanuel's house and whilst Emmanuel is putting Penelope to bed and making sure she is locked in, James surreptitiously reads through his brother's recent notes. He is astonished to find that Emmanuel has quite by chance found a way to induce madness but the notes don't properly explain how Emmanuel came by the strange sample - only a vague mention of it being to do with the new skeleton. James is determined that he should be the one to excel in this field, so that night he sends a lackey to steal the skeleton. Unfortunately it is a stormy night and as the skeleton is carried away it gets wet and the flesh re-grows over its entire body and its gruesome form lives again. Emmanuel could not stop the theft but he knows the rain will reanimate it and he trembles with dread at what terror will now be unleashed. He burns the separated finger and then tries to hide away upstairs. The creature breaks into the house and seems to be looking for the finger but cannot find it. It then locates Emmanuel and looms over him seemingly demanding something but Emmanuel has no idea what it wants as he cowers in fear. The creature lunges at Emmanuel and he collapses. End of the main story. | |
| Framing Sequence: The main story is book-ended by a framing sequence. At the start a much older-looking Emmanuel is appealing to a young doctor to help him combat a terrible evil and by way of explanation he tells the main story of how that evil was unleashed. Then at the end it is revealed that Emmanuel is an inmate at an insane asylum whose madness causes him to believe the ridiculous story to be true and even think that the institute director James Hildern is his brother and another inmate Penelope is his daughter.
The viewer does not know if James has dissolutely locked his brother up in his asylum and disowned him in order to make sure he wins all the academic plaudits, or whether Emmanuel's ravings are all indeed a deluded fantasy. That is until we see that Emmanuel is missing a finger - the same finger that the creature was missing and clearly when the creature lunged at him it had taken Emmanuel's finger to replace its own and then departed leaving no evidence to back up Emmanuel's crazy-seeming ravings about an evil monster. | |
| Starring: | Peter Cushing (as Emmanuel Hildern), Christopher Lee (as James Hildern, asylum director), Lorna Heilbron (as Penelope Hildern, Emmanuel's daughter), George Benson (as Waterlow, Emmanuel's lab assistant) |
| Featuring: | Kenneth J. Warren (as Charles Lenny, escaped inmate), Duncan Lamont (as Police Inspector searching for Lenny), Harry Locke (as Barman at tavern), Hedger Wallace (as Doctor Perry, James' assistant), Michael Ripper (as Delivery man), Catherine Finn (as Emily, Emmanuel Hildern's maid), Jenny Runacre (as Marguerite Hildern, Emmanuel's wife in flashbacks), Robert Swann (as Young Aristocrat, lusting after unhinged Penelope), David Bailie (as Young Doctor, in framing sequence), Maurice Bush (as Karl, James' lackey who steals skeleton), Tony Wright (as Sailor, getting fresh with unhinged Penelope), Marianne Stone (as James' Assistant) |
| Starlets: | Alexandra Dane (as Tavern Whore), Sue Bond (as Tavern Whore, [uncredited]) |
| Writers: Jimmy Sangster, Alfred Shaughnessy / Director: Alan Gibson / Producer: Michael Carreras | |
| Type: Suspense Thriller | Running Time: 89 mins |
| Susan Roberts is a young American woman who is writing a thesis on the life and works of acclaimed modern composer Henry Ryman. At a scholarship function she meets Ryman's widow Danielle and receives her invitation to come and stay at their French villa to do some research amongst her late husband's private papers.
Danielle lives with her wheelchair-bound son Georges along with butler Carter and maid Lillianne. Danielle still reveres her husband's immense talent and often listens to recordings of his works - she regrets that he died leaving a concerto unfinished. When Susan arrives she discovers that the luggage she sent on ahead never arrived but Danielle provides her with some clothes which belonged to a woman who she says stayed here once and they fit Susan perfectly. Susan even discovers in a family photo album that she resembles the other woman who was called Catherine and had apparently been Georges' girlfriend. Danielle is very welcoming and accommodating and tells Susan she can stay for as long as she likes. Georges had once been a promising sportsman until the incident that paralysed him six years ago. He is now dependant upon drugs that Danielle administers to control his pain. However he needs more than she is willing to give him and so he has an arrangement with the scheming French maid Lillianne to get him more drugs in return for what she anticipates will lead to marriage. Lillianne becomes more demanding of a firm commitment taking advantage of Georges dependability on her - but not long afterwards she is killed in the villa's swimming pool by an unseen swimmer. Susan is merely told that Lillianne was sacked. After that Susan and Georges become closer and she starts to fall in love with him. She finds out that Catherine had left the villa following Georges' accident which has left him unable to father children. Susan helps him get more drugs by sneaking into Danielle's room for extra dosages - but she is shocked to discover that rather than the medicine she thought it was it is in fact heroin. While Georges is under the influence of drugs we are privy to a flashback that shows him in bed with the Susan look-alike Catherine when another man who exactly resembles Georges comes in with a shotgun - the other man kills Catherine with one barrel and causes the paralysing injury to Georges with the second shot. (We cannot be certain when we first see it whether this is a straight flashback or an allegorious nightmare - but it turns out to be an accurate account). Eventually Susan discovers that Georges has a dangerously mad twin brother called Jacques that Danielle adores and keeps in hiding. Catherine had actually been Jacques wife but had been having an affair with Georges. This betrayal sent Jacques mad and he shot her dead and badly wounded Georges (as per the flashback). Jacques madness and anger at Catherine still pervades strong to this day six years later and Danielle supplies him with manikins resembling her that he can freely mutilate to prevent him trying to take it out on real people. Despite this precaution Jacques has already killed Lillianne which Danielle covered up. Danielle invited Susan here with a purpose in mind - she wants a grandchild that might grow up to become a musical genius and complete her late husband's unfinished concerto. Since Georges is unable to father children, Danielle hopes to engineer current events so that Jacques would father it. This is why she invited Susan to stay when she saw her at the scholarship and realised how much she resembled Catherine. But Jacques' hatred of Catherine is too great and when he corners Susan in a cellar all he wants to do is kill her in the gruesome manner he destroys his manikins and not have children with her. She manages to get away but he gives chase with a shotgun and Danielle is left with no alternative but the painful choice to shoot him herself before he murders again. Susan quickly leaves while she can and gets away from the highly troubled family. | |
| Starring: | Stefanie Powers (as Susan Roberts), James Olson (as Georges and Jacques Ryman), Margaretta Scott (as Danielle Ryman), Jane Lapotaire (as Lillianne, maid), Joss Ackland (as Carter, manservant) |
| Starlets: | Kirsten Betts (as Catherine) |
| NOTES: | |
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This is the film in which Stefanie Powers has generally always been thought to have done a topless scene. But after watching the film properly with the topless scene in its proper context an element of doubt arises. To explain - Stefanie Powers is playing Susan who resembles Catherine (the dead wife of James Olson). "Catherine" does not actually appear in the movie except for the scene in question - which is a flashback scene to when Catherine was shot dead. Because Susan is supposed to look like Catherine it might seem a reasonable enough assumption that Stefanie Powers would have played her as well - but perhaps this has led to a long-standing mis-identification of who was playing the woman in that scene. This doubt is because "Catherine" is actually shown in the end credits as being played by starlet Kirsten Betts - (not as a body double but simply a different character) and since "Catherine" does not appear anywhere else in the movie other than this scene then there would seem to be no other reason for her credit other than this flashback murder scene with the topless moment. The woman in the scene certainly does resemble Stefanie Powers but since (as part of the story) she is meant to look similar then this isn't completely persuasive. So it might well be Stefanie Powers as is generally believed but after watching the film in full and checking the credits there certainly seems to be valid room for doubt as to whether Stefanie Powers had any nudity in the movie at all. |
| Writer/Director: Ken Hughes / Producer: Irving Allen | |
| Type: Historical Drama | Running Time: 134 mins |
| Beginning in 1640. Parliamentarian Oliver Cromwell has become disillusioned with the political and religious direction that England is taking and is planning to take his family and move to the New World (America). His vision of a great England has been corrupted by King Charles I whose personal ambitions of conquest have outweighed his responsibilities to his people and their welfare. The king has displayed a persistent disregard for the parliamentary system which is supposed to be in governance and curb the king's powers by controlling the purse strings. But the system is being bypassed or ignored and as a man with passionately outspoken high moral principals Cromwell is persuaded by his peers that he should stay and oppose the king's tyranny.
The king needs more money to fund a new war and parliament is voting on the matter. The king's advisers have persuaded him that dissenters to the bill should be arrested for treason. But Cromwell turns the tables on them and whilst making sure he attests his allegiance to the king argues that the advisers are guilty of ill-advising their monarch and hence guilty of treason themselves - and with parliament backing this allegation the king has no choice but to have his chief adviser executed. So begins a battle of political manoeuvrings between sovereign and state with Cromwell instrumental in trying to bring the king into line and adhere to the system that Cromwell so fervently believes in. But when the king decides that his only recourse is to order parliament dissolved, the country is pushed into a state of civil war between the forces under command of the parliamentarian earls (Roundheads) and the kings forces (Cavaliers). Many pitched battles ensue with the king's men more often triumphant. Cromwell decides better training is required and takes time to regroup and properly train his troops and eventually his superior tactics prove effective in overcoming the king's larger armies. The king is captured and arrested and charged with high treason. Cromwell wishes only to have the king agree to be legally bound by the parliamentary system and he can keep his throne. But whilst pretending to consider these matters the king is secretly attempting to negotiate the import of troops from foreign countries to help overthrow the parliamentary forces. This deceit seals his fate and he is tried and found guilty and executed. Cromwell decrees that the office of king is dissolved and from now on the country is a republic. He retires to Cambridge to let parliament continue believing his mission of righteousness is successfully accomplished. Six years pass and upon a return visit to London, Cromwell is dismayed to find that he miscalculated, for without a strong overall figurehead, parliament has descended into an anarchy of selfish corruption and irresponsibility and so he returns to take over and impose his great vision of the democratic system of governance. He becomes Lord Protector of England and lays the firm foundations for the truly strong and great nation that will emerge from these times. He holds the role for five years until his death and three years later the monarchy is re-established with Charles II under the new tighter controls Cromwell instituted. | |
| Starring: | Richard Harris (as Oliver Cromwell), Alec Guinness (as King Charles I) |
| Featuring: | Robert Morley, Frank Finlay, Dorothy Tutin, Timothy Dalton, Patrick Wymark, Patrick Magee, Nigel Stock, Charles Gray, Michael Jayston, Geoffrey Keen, Zena Walker |
| Crooks and Coronets (1969) | Previous Next |
| Writer/Director: Jim O'Connolly / Producer: Herman Cohen | |
| Type: Crime Caper | Running Time: 100 mins |
| Herbie Haseler is an American crook who has just spent five years in the New York State Penitentiary for an armoured car hold-up that went wrong because of his bungling. When he is released he is reunited with his criminal friend Marty Miller who did the botched job with him. Herbie has been using his period of incarceration to plan a perfect robbery but he needs finance to fund it. Herbie and Marty approach the local crime syndicate boss Nick Marco for a loan of $10,000. Herbie had been a librarian at his prison and has read up about English stately homes and knows they contain rich pickings. He has selected the most promising of these called Great Friars Halls which is said to contain many priceless antiques and paintings that could net them $5m. Marco is reluctant to stump up the cash because of Herbie's poor reputation and thinks he doesn't have the right sort of ruthless mindset one needs to be a really good criminal. But when he hears that the Great Friars collection contains paintings by a famous French artist which he needs for his own collection he relents. Marco does insist however that Herbie liaise with his British counterpart Frank Finley.
Herbie and Marty arrive in England and are met by Finley. They tell him they first need to recce the target and will contact him when they are ready to proceed. Finley is a bit perturbed that someone else is working on his patch but because it is a favour for Marco he is willing to be flexible. He is also more than somewhat intrigued about quite what the Americans are up to that was such a big deal they needed to come all this way. Herbie and Marty arrive at Great Friars country manor thinking they will have to use stealth tactics to gain entry but then find it is as easy as buying a ticket for a guided tour because it is open to the public. While on the tour they meet the owner Lord Freddie Fitzmore, a very personable young man who lives there with his grandmother Lady Sophie. Herbie pretends to be a security expert and offers to suggest ways they could improve their protection against theft. Herbie is very convincing and soon gains their complete trust. He and Marty offer to help catalogue all their valuable articles and they are invited to stay as guests for the duration. Herbie and Marty learn that Great Friars is insolvent due to recently having to pay double death duties and now the only income with which to upkeep the vast acreage is a paltry amount received from the tourists. And Lady Sophie's penchant for gambling at casinos does not help. Their family heirlooms are valuable but they cannot be sold because they are entailed as inheritance. Freddie jokes with unknowing irony that in some ways it would be handy if someone stole them all because then they'd get the insurance money. Freddie and Sophie are so nice and friendly that Herbie and Marty start to feel sorry for them and lose focus on their criminal objective. Instead Herbie starts to make suggestions about how visitor revenue could be boosted with a few tweaks and before long business is booming. Freddie is extremely grateful and hopes that the pair will stay on and work with him full time. Herbie and Marty realise that they can't go through with their plan because they have grown too fond of their hosts and couldn't bear to hurt them with a betrayal. But they are now in a pickle because they still owe money to Marco who is expecting his paintings. A couple of months have passed and Marco comes over to England to see why it is taking so long to get things moving. He and Finley summon Herbie and Marty to a meeting and tell them they've had long enough to prepare and want a report. Herbie decides his best bet is to exaggerate the security at Great Friars and tell tall tales of machine gun posts, patrols by wild animals, and aerial reconnaissance. He indicates that any attempt to enter by force would be met with heavy casualties and so recommends that they would be advised to abandon the idea. But Marco tells Herbie that since he is living there he can sabotage the security and make it safe before they arrive. Herbie and Marty have no choice but to agree and the date and time is set when Finley's mob will arrive to remove the valuables. Back at the manor Herbie decides to come clean and admit to their hosts their real original intention for coming here, but tell them that they now want to do all they can to help. Freddie and Sophie forgive them because they know they are basically good decent men and together they devise a defiant plan to repel the invaders. When the criminals arrive with their cars and lorries the manor staff go into action with crossbows and horseback attacks to divide and panic the gang until they scarper in fear. The household celebrate their triumph and Herbie and Marty agree to stay and work there permanently and continue to improve its revenue. And one year later Lady Sophie gets her wish when they open the manor house as a casino as well. | |
| Starring: | Telly Savalas (as Herbie Haseler), Warren Oates (as Marty Miller), Edith Evans (as Lady Sophie Fitzmore), Nicky Henson (as Lord Freddie Fitzmore) |
| Featuring: | Harry H. Corbett (as Frank Finley, British crime boss), Cesar Romero (as Nick Marco, American syndicate boss), Vickery Turner (as Annie, manor maid) |
| Familiar Faces: | Frank Thornton (as Cyril, manor guard), Arthur Mullard (as Perce, casino bouncer), Hattie Jacques and Clive Dunn (as Camping couple, [cameos]) |
| Starlets: | Margaret Nolan (as Finley's Girlfriend at airport, [uncredited]) |
| Crooks in Cloisters (1964) | Previous Next |
| Writers: T.J. Morrison, Mike Watts / Director: Jeremy Summers / Producer: Gordon L.T. Scott | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 93 mins |
| A gang of six criminals led by Walter Dodd have made a notorious name for themselves with a number of successful burglaries. But when their latest venture ends in relative failure due to unforeseen precautions taken by a dogged detective superintendent called Mungo, Walter decides they had best lay low until police interest in them quietens down.
Walt buys a monastery on a small offshore island from an order of monks who could no longer afford its upkeep. The gang move to the island and start living undercover as monks. For the sake of outward appearances they have to continue with the monastic duties. At first they find the regime of hardship and privation a burdensome toil as they cultivate the monastery land and tend the farm animals - but over time they begin to get into the routine and take a pride in their work. In the meantime the gang set themselves up as a fencing service to process other criminal gangs' stolen goods, breaking down jewellery and gold as well as printing counterfeit banknotes. A local fisherman called Phineas is employed to smuggle the items to and from the island. In the course of supply trips to the mainland village, young bashful gang member Willy meets Phineas' granddaughter June and they fall for each other. Also greyhound owner Squirts cannot resist laying some sizeable bets on one of his personal dogs via an intermediary. At the end of a successful year's stay at the monastery Walt decides it is time to leave. The gang have learned to appreciate the peace and tranquillity of this simpler way of life but the risk of them being exposed as fraudulent monks is too great with the real former monks due to pay them a visit. Their lucrative operation has earned them £30,000 apiece. But when they boat over to the mainland they find the police waiting for them. Detective Mungo had at last tracked them down when he became suspicious of the large bets being placed on Squirt's greyhounds and he traced their origin. Before they are arrested Walt carries out one last good deed and donates the monastery's paid-up deeds of ownership to the former monks so they can return to live there without any money worries. | |
| Starring: | (Gang) Ronald Fraser (as Walter Dodd, leader), Barbara Windsor (as Bikini), Bernard Cribbins (as Squirts McGinty), Davy Kaye (as Specs), Melvyn Hayes (as Willy), Gregoire Aslan (as Lorenzo) Wilfrid Brambell (as Phineas, boatman), Francesca Annis (as June, Phineas' granddaughter) |
| Featuring: | Alister Williamson (as Superintendent Mungo, detective), Joseph O'Conor and Corin Redgrave (as Father Septimus and Brother Lucius, former incumbents of monastery) |
| Crucible of Terror (1971) | Previous Next |
| Writers: Ted Hooker, Tom Parkinson / Director: Ted Hooker / Producer: Tom Parkinson | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 86 mins |
| In the opening scene an oriental woman is seen laying on a slab in a cavern workshop - the kimono she was wearing is ripped off and discarded and then a man covers her with plaster paste and then encases her in molten bronze creating an item that appears to be a sculpture of a recumbent woman.
An unknown duration later this statue is seen displayed in a gallery. The exhibition is organised by John Davies who is showcasing the work of new unknown artists. His partner in the gallery is Michael who supplied the sculpture which came from his father's studio and was taken without permission. Interest in the sculpture is high and John realises that he could easily sell more work by this artist and asks Michael if he can get more. Michael doubts his father Victor Clare would agree but suggests that John pays his father a visit to try and negotiate a deal with him. Victor Clare lives in an isolated cliff top house in the seaside town of Denhaven and John invites his girlfriend Millie with him for a holiday break accompanied by Michael and his wife Jane. Millie was earlier seen browsing in a market where she bought a second-hand kimono. Victor's house is built near the site of an abandoned tin mine and legends of the ghosts of trapped miners abound. Victor is forthright and charming with a striking appearance - he lives with his wife who is dipping into senility with childlike regression. Also around are Marcia, a young model who lives with them and Bill, a former assistant of Victors and expert on eastern artefacts who was once a rival for Dorothy's affections. Victor says he no longer produces sculptures due to lack of inspiration and has redirected his talents to painting. His passion is to preserve the glory of youthful feminine beauty and he tries to persuade Millie to pose for him as he sees in her an inner radiance that he has only ever seen once before - she declines however. Meanwhile some deaths have occurred - Michael's wife Jane is stabbed while getting changed after modelling for Victor and Michael is bludgeoned to death while on the beach - both by assailants unseen. Their absences are satisfactorily explained away by various household members. Victor agrees to sell John some art but wants immediate cash - this means John has to travel back to town to make some calls to raise some interest from his investors. With John out of the way Victor continues to pester Millie to pose - she goes for a walk to escape his badgering but he follows. She finds the entrance to the tin mine and gets lost in the maze of tunnels pursued by Victor who is concerned about her safety - then she is found by Dorothy who leads her up some stairs which lead to a secret entrance to the Clare's home. John phones to say his car has broken down and he will be delayed getting back so Bill goes to pick him up in his van. To placate Victor Millie finally and reluctantly agrees to pose for his painting. She wears the yellow kimono she had bought earlier and has been using generally as a dressing-gown, but when Victor makes a sexual pass at her she flees the room. Another murder also occurs when model Marcia has acid thrown in her face after Victor had told her her services would no longer be required. Millie flees into the cave systems and finds some bodies of the murdered people and then runs into Victor and faints. Victor then starts preparing her unconscious body for the same treatment as the oriental girl in the opening scene - he fires up his crucible to smelt the metal preparing to immortalise her. But she comes to and seemingly possessed attacks him and after a struggle he dies in his furnace. John arrives back from town with Bill and they find the aftermath of the struggle. Bill deduces what has happened and explains that the oriental girl called Chi-San had been a member of a sinister religious sect who worked as Victor's model and she had obsessed him but she suddenly went mysteriously missing and all that remained was a statue Victor had made of her which Victor claimed was cursed. Chi-San's cult believed that the dead could enter the minds of the living and control their actions. It was Millie who committed the murders and whenever she put on the kimono which had once belonged to Chi-San she was under the control of the dead woman. Even though Millie had bought the kimono in a market purely by chance before she even knew she would be coming to Denhaven Bill believes that it was pre-ordained. | |
| Starring: | Mike Raven (as Victor Clare, the artist), Mary Maude (as Millie), James Bolam (as John), Ronald Lacey (as Michael) |
| Featuring: | Betty Alberge (as Dorothy), John Arnatt (as Bill), Judy Matheson (as Marcia), Beth Morris (as Jane) Melissa Stribling (as Joanna, gallery investor) |
| Starlets: | Me Me Lay (as Chi-San) |
| Cruel Passion (1977) | Previous Next |
| aka: Justine | |
| Writer: Ian Cullen / Director/Producer: Chris Boger | |
| Type: Period Drama | Running Time: 94 mins |
| Period drama set in the late 18th Century. Sixteen-year-old Justine and her seventeen-year-old sister Juliette are being raised in a convent. Juliette has been corrupted by the immoral nature of the nuns' general lasciviousness but Justine is devout and has kept herself pure. When their father and mother die and are therefore no longer able to pay for their continued upkeep the Mother Superior wants them both to leave and so when Justine spurns the woman's frenzied lust she uses that as a pretext to cast them both out.
Juliette knows someone in London who works in a brothel and takes Justine with her there. The brothel Madame is only too happy to take them in and teach them the many ways to pleasure a man - but Justine is aghast at such practices and flees back to the countryside. On her own and foolishly relying on the kindness of others she has an unfortunate encounter with a pastor who has ulterior motives for allowing her a room for the night. She escapes his clutches when he falls to his accidental death from a tower but she fears she may be accused of his death. With no one to turn to she wanders and links up with what turns out to be a gang of robbers led by the unscrupulous Mrs Bonny who feigns kind friendship but is really looking for what she can make from her as the gang put her to use as a lure to help them stop and rob coaches. Meanwhile her sister has sent her boyfriend Lord Carlisle to look for her but will he be able to save her? | |
| Comments: It's a depressing tale of depravity in all areas. No one except Justine is really without fault although some are less nasty than others and Justine is routinely deceived and tricked by people she puts her trust in. There is a deliciously potent line when she has sought sanctuary with a pastor and she thanks him for his kindness and he replies "We would often feel ashamed of our kind actions if the world could see the motives behind them". Even in the finale she is betrayed ... The manly figure of Lord Carlisle rescues her from the band of robbers risking life and limb and displaying all his fighting skills in a typically heroic manner to save the girl and it seems that she's going to be alright after all and that her life will resume in a more orderly manner. But then after she has been bathing in a lake to clean up after her ordeal the expected upbeat ending is turned on its head when her saviour turns on her and brutally rapes her; and then the robbers still on their trail catch up to them and she is viscously mauled by two of their Doberman attack dogs and then she is gang raped by the robbers before being thrown unconscious into the lake to drown! So not a happy ending at all - the film ends there and so presumably she died although it doesn't actually make that totally clear. | |
| Starring: | Koo Stark (as Justine), Lydia Lisle (as Juliette), Martin Potter (as Lord Carlisle) |
| Featuring: | Katherine Kath (brothel Madame), Hope Jackman (Mrs Bonny) , Maggie Petersen (Mother Superior), Louis Ife (Pastor) |
| Starlets: | Ann Michelle, Malou Cartwright, Jeannie Collings, Jennifer Guy, Barbara Eatwell, Glory Annen, Joanna Andrews, Carol Noh, Yvonne Quenet, Echo Strade |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the novel Justine by the Marquis de Sade. |
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Lydia Lisle receives an "introducing" credit. |
| Cry of the Banshee (1970) | Previous Next |
| Writer: Tim Kelly, Christopher Wicking / Director/Producer: Gordon Hessler | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 87 mins approx |
| In the Sixteenth century primitive superstitions are still rife amongst the people and magistrate Lord Edward Whitman is determined to eliminate any worship of those heathen ways. He and his two sons Harry and Sean seek to root out practitioners they class as witches and execute them, brutally torturing anyone who might be able to give them further information on a witches whereabouts.
Lord Edward rules his area like a king and lives like one in a large castle - he has had a string of wives and is now on his third although he barely acknowledges her and allows her to be chaperoned by a male step-groom called Roderick who has a special gift to tame and soothe wild animals with his calming voice. The Whitman's discover a practising coven and set their men massacring the worshipers but in a uncharacteristic act of leniency Lord Edward spares the head witch Oona so she can spread the word that the heathen ways will no longer be tolerated. But instead, when the Whitman's are gone, Oona issues a curse on the Whitman family summoning up an avenger from her lord Satan. Soon after Sean is attacked and killed by what is thought to be a wild dog. Other members of the Whitman family have similar fates. Oona's curse has control of step-groom Roderick via an old medallion he always wears turning him into a murderous wolfman creature. The surviving Whitman's discover this and Oona is killed and they also think they have decisively killed the creature and flee the area by stagecoach. But the Roderick-creature survives and fulfils the remainder of the curse. The End. | |
| Starring: | Vincent Price (as Lord Edward Whitman), Essy Persson (as Lady Patricia Whitman, wife), Patrick Mower (as Roderick, step-groom), Carl Rigg (as Harry Whitman, son), Stephen Chase (as Sean Whitman, son), Hilary Dwyer (as Maureen Whitman, daughter) |
| Featuring: | Elisabeth Bergner (as Oona), Andrew McCulloch Michael Elphick |
| Starlets: | Pamela Fairbrother, Sally Geeson, Quinn O'Hara, Jane Deady, Jan Rossini, Pamela Moiseiwitsch |
| NOTES: | |
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A video version of this distributed by Filmways Pictures Inc has also been seen which removes all trace of nudity by either truncating scenes early or zooming the picture in a bit - also a later scene when Vincent Price's men are massacring a coven of witches is moved to a pre-credits position - the only nudity that survives in this version is the accidental momentary breast glimpse of Sally Geeson when she is shot at a banquet for attacking Vincent Price. This version lasts 82 mins. |
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Pamela Fairbrother's surname is spelt "Farbrother" on opening and closing credits. |
| Cul-de-sac (1966) | Previous Next |
| Writers: Roman Polanski, Gerard Brach / Director: Roman Polanski / Producer: Gene Gutowski | |
| Type: Thriller | Running Time: 107 mins |
| Two wounded criminals have escaped in a stolen car and driven across a causeway onto the offshore island of Lindersfarn in Northumberland. Richard is a brash American who has a wounded arm but his partner Albie has more serious life threatening injuries. The only signs of habitation seem to be at an old castle and Richard makes his way there to use their phone to call for help from his crime boss.
The castle is owned by Englishman George and his new French wife Teresa who enjoy a fun-loving relationship in their simple and secluded back-to-basics way of life. But when Richard arrives he takes over waving his gun around and takes them semi-hostage. George is not a brave or physical man and Richard's loud and overbearing aggressive manner keeps the pair in line as they wait it out for the arrival of Richard's associates and an uncertain fate for themselves at the end of it. Albie dies of his injuries and they all help bury him. The island is always cut off from the mainland during high tide and Richard has disabled the phone so he allows the couple a certain degree of freedom during the day knowing they can't go anywhere or contact anyone. A day goes by and Richard's associates have not turned up and he is growing anxious. When some of George's friends pop by unexpectedly to belatedly celebrate their wedding Richard pretends to be the couple's butler to explain his presence. George appears to be becoming somewhat unhinged by events and his friends soon feel unwelcome and leave. Teresa wishes her husband was more of a man so that he could challenge Richard and get them out of this predicament. When Richard goes to make another call he has somewhat relaxed his guard and Teresa steals his gun and gives it to George. When Richard realises the weapon has gone he demands it back and is confronted by George waving it around uncertainly without much of a clue how to use it. George takes a couple of wild shots at the advancing criminal and then gets in a lucky shot and hits Richard full in the chest - and although it takes some time before his body realises it Richard has been mortally wounded and dies. Their immediate worries seem to be over but George has been sent mad by the whole experience and Teresa, having seen him at his worst, leaves him. | |
| Starring: | Donald Pleasence (as George), Françoise Dorléac (as Teresa, wife of George), Lionel Stander (as Richard, villain) |
| Featuring: | Jack MacGowran (as Albie, villain), Iain Quarrier (as Christopher, neighbour, young man having affair with Teresa), Robert Dorning (as Philip Fairweather, visiting friend of George), Marie Kean (as Marion Fairweather, wife of Philip), William Franklyn (as Cecil, friend of Fairweathers), Jackie Bisset (as Jacqueline, wife of Cecil), Geoffrey Sumner (as Christopher's Father), Renee Houston (as Christopher's Mother) |
| NOTES: | |
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Made in Black and White |
| Writer/Director: David Bracknell / Producer: Roy Simpson | |
| Type: Drama | Running Time: 60 mins |
| Barton United is a local boys football team playing in the Barton Junior League in Manchester. Skipper Bates is the captain and his sister Vicky and her girlfriends help out with the kit mending and cleaning. Their local rivals are Tooley Green who are the current cup holders and as such have use of the Park Ground for their matches while Barton United have to make do with playing on some wasteground. A local councillor called Mr Bates who manages Tooley Green and has a son called Thumper on the team wants to make sure that his team wins the forthcoming cup challenge and attempts to sabotage Barton United's chances by evicting them from their wasteground pitch which he has decided should become a car park.
Skipper and co are desperate to find a new ground to train on as Mr Bates tries to thwart their efforts by reporting their usage of other wasteland to the local policeman. The children become wary of the policeman thinking he will arrest them if he catches them playing but actually he feels sorry for them and wants to help. He was a footballer himself once and had a try-out for Manchester United and he calls in some favours and gets them a day's training at the Manchester United ground with the team. They meet the manager Matt Busby and are taught various tips and techniques by some of the players. As chance would have it Barton United and Tooley Green both win through to the final and despite Mr Bates and Thumper's last ditch attempts to sabotage their rival's team the boys of Barton United go on to win the match and the right to play on the park ground. | |
| Starring: | Bernard Cribbins (as The Policeman), Sonia Graham (as Mrs Davis), David Lodge (as Mr Bates), Johnny Wade (as Pete Bailey, the Milkman) (Principal Children) Denis Gilmore (as Skipper Davis), Susan George (as Vicky Davis) |
| Featuring: | (other featured child characters) Jim Morgan (as Rocket Bailey), Gary Mason (as Fatso Cook), Olivia Hussey (as Jinny), Amanda Humby (as Hovis), Pip Rolls (as Thumper Bates) |
| Star-Turns: | Matt Busby (Manager of Manchester United) |
| NOTES: | |
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Made in Black and White. A Children's Film Foundation production. |
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Of the 19 children on the cast list (16 boys and 3 girls) - only 2 of the girls became familiar names:- Susan George and Olivia Hussey |
| Writer: Jimmy Sangster / Director: Terence Fisher / Producer: Anthony Hinds | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 79 mins |
| Set in Switzerland in the mid-1800s. The young Victor Frankenstein was a brilliant scholar whose scientific intellect took him way beyond anything school could teach him. When Victor is orphaned as a teenager he inherits a vast fortune and the title of Baron. He decides to leave school and hire himself a private tutor called Paul Krempe to live with him and help him expand his scientific horizons and focus on an area of science that has always fascinated him - the secret of life itself. Victor learns a lot from Paul but after a few years Victor's innate brilliance eclipses that of his tutor and as he becomes a grown man their relationship shifts into a partnership of scientific discovery. Paul is led by Victor's direction as they probe into the very essence of life.
After years of experimenting with electrochemical reactions they have their first incredible success when they manage to restore life to a dog that had been dead. Paul is elated and thinks they should announce their breakthrough to the world. But Victor has greater ambitions and for him this was merely the first step. Victor's ultimate goal is to build a new perfect human being patched together from the finest cadavers available and then give it life with their new process. Paul thinks the idea abhorrent but he is persuaded by Victor's enthusiasm to continue helping. Victor begins to gather the body parts he needs from the recently deceased and stitch them together. He meticulously assembles his creation with hands, eyes and various organs he acquires from illicit sources. Meanwhile Victor's distant cousin Elizabeth arrives following the death of her mother in order to take up a long-standing family arrangement that she and Victor will marry. Victor is delighted to abide and welcomes her to his house but he does not allow her to enter his top floor laboratory and tells her nothing of his work. Paul decides he no longer wants to be involved in Victor's horrific obsession but continues to live in the house to protect Elizabeth from the danger he believes Victor's work poses. Victor knows there is one vital component left unfilled - the brain. He wants his creation to be brilliant with a mind replete with a lifetime's knowledge but the chances of such a brain becoming available to him seems remote. Up until now Victor has not done anything indubitably illegal but his needs are such that a facilitation is required to bring his requirements to hand. To this end Victor invites a distinguished scientist called Professor Bernstein to dinner and then arranges an "accident" in which Bernstein falls over the top floor banisters to his death. Victor extends the courtesy of allowing the professor to be buried in his family crypt and then after the funeral he sneaks inside and removes the precious brain. However Paul catches him in the act and they have a fight in which the brain is dropped. Victor worries that the brain may have been damaged but he has gone too far to change his plans now. Victor installs the brain in his creature and then activates his electrochemicals. Unfortunately the effort fails because he cannot generate sufficient power - but then lightning strikes the building and a supercharge surges through the equipment and the creature is imbued with life. Victor's amazing ambition has been realised. However the creature does not respond to Victor's commands and shows no signs of having a reasoning intelligence. It is immensely strong however and breaks out of the laboratory and into the surrounding woodland. Victor persuades Paul into helping him recapture the creature. Paul believes the creature to be a vile abomination on life and shoots it dead to end Victor's grand folly. Victor appears to accept the outcome and they bury the creature. Paul leaves the house now that the danger is over. But secretly Victor recovers the body and repairs the bullet damage and then uses his equipment to bring it back to life. He keeps the creature chained and locked in a side room where he can continue to study it. When the housemaid Justine finds out what Victor is doing and threatens to expose him unless he marries her instead of Elizabeth, Victor lures her to his laboratory and locks her in the room with the creature who proceeds to kill her. Victor and Elizabeth marry and when Paul arrives as a guest Victor cannot resist showing him the creature and demonstrating the progress he has made with its dim-witted obedience of simple commands. Paul is appalled and scornful of the so-called supreme being that Victor had envisaged. Victor tells Paul that he lays the blame for that at his feet for the damage done to the brain. Paul vows to make Victor pay for the atrocities he has wreaked in pursuit of his obsession. Paul rushes out and Victor follows hoping to calm him down leaving the laboratory door open. Elizabeth is curious about what Victor does in there and enters the lab. She hears a noise from the next room and goes to look. The room is empty because the creature has broken free of its chains and escaped through a skylight window. Curious, Elizabeth follows onto the roof. Victor and Paul see what is going on and rush up to save her. Victor shoots at the creature to save his wife and it falls through the skylight directly into the acid bath Victor uses to dispose of unwanted materials. The creature is completely destroyed. Paul makes sure the authorities learn of the deaths that Victor caused and he is arrested and sentenced to death by guillotine. In prison awaiting execution Victor has become a broken man and blames everything on the creature and denies any responsibility himself. He tells a priest his story hoping for some understanding and then he is led away to the guillotine. | |
| Starring: | Peter Cushing (as Baron Victor Frankenstein), Robert Urquhart (as Paul Krempe, Victor's tutor and later colleague), Hazel Court (as Elizabeth, Victor's cousin and later wife), Christopher Lee (as The Creature, [non-speaking role]) |
| Featuring: | Melvyn Hayes (as Teenage Victor), Valerie Gaunt (as Justine, Victor's maid), Paul Hardtmuth (as Professor Bernstein), Noel Hood (as Aunt Sophie, Elizabeth's mother), Alex Gallier (as Priest) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the classic story by Mary W. Shelley |
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This is the first of Hammer's Frankenstein movies. The next one was The Revenge of Frankenstein (1958). The events of the first two movies are within the same continuity and the sequel explains how Frankenstein managed to cheat death at the guillotine. |
| Writers: Mervyn Haisman, Henry Lincoln / Director: Vernon Sewell / Producer: Louis M. Heyward | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 83 mins |
| Robert Manning runs an antique shop with his brother Peter who is currently away on a buying trip. When Robert has received no word from his brother for a while he contacts the last place he knew he'd visited - Crackford Lodge in Graymarshe. Robert's family used to live in that village centuries ago but he has not been there himself. When he phones, the current owner J D Morley denies knowing or meeting anyone called Peter Manning - so Robert decides to visit the place himself and look around.
His visit coincides with a traditional village celebration of witch burning where they burn an effigy of a notorious witch from the seventeenth century called Lavinia Morley. She was named the Black Witch of Graymarshe and legend says that when she was burnt she had issued a curse on all her accusers and their descendants. Robert finds Mr Morley very welcoming and he is offered a room at the large estate house. Robert also meets Morley's niece Eve who is very friendly, and a man called Professor John Marshe who lives nearby and is an expert on the occult and the mystical history of this area of the country in particular. Eve is helping Professor Marshe with secretarial work towards a book he is currently writing on the subject. Unfortunately no one at the house or in the village recalls ever having met a Peter Manning. At night Robert has a strange dream in which he is brought before the witch Lavinia in a ceremonial chamber room and urged to blood sign his name in an ancient book - he refuses and the dream ends although it seemed so vivid and real to him. When Robert actually describes his brother to Eve she says she does recall him after all but he was called Dennis Foster. Robert realises how dumb he had been not to think of asking under that name which Peter used when travelling incognito not wanting a seller to know he is an established dealer. However all Eve and Mr Morley can offer is that "Dennis Foster" was here but left about ten days ago. The next night, after his further enquiries after Peter have still proven fruitless, Robert has another dream and this time the witch Lavinia cuts him with a knife when he again refuses to sign the book. And after he awakens his arm is bleeding profusely. Eve helps patch him up and they begin a sexual relationship. Robert visits Professor Marshe to ask what significance his dreams have and is told that were he to sign that book all would be lost and he would be trapped. Marshe tells Robert that his ancestor Jonathan Manning had actually been Lavinia's chief accuser and as the last of his line Robert is subject to her curse. Back at the house Stephen sees a trail of his own blood leading from a wall and finds a secret passage leading up to a attic room which matches the one from his dreams. He shows it to Eve and although it looks to be disused and dusty it soon becomes clear that the cobwebs are false. They find the ancient book and inside is the name of Peter Manning signed in blood which proves he was here - Robert discovers Peter's charm bracelet on the ground and realises he must be dead. When Morley finds out that Robert has discovered the room he reveals himself as the villain of the piece - a powerful warlock determined to fulfil the curse of his long dead ancestor. All of Robert's "dreams" had been real experiences while in a state of hypnosis under which Morley had placed him. Morley now plans to kill both Robert and his own niece Eve for her betrayal of the family name by assisting Robert - then he intends to torch the place and has doused the room in petrol in preparation. He has the two of them tied up at his mercy and is about to kill Eve when Professor Marshe enters and shoots at him. Morley is wounded but manages to start the fire. Robert and Eve are freed and escape back downstairs with Marshe as the whole house catches aflame. Morley is trapped on the roof unable to escape and burns to death. Marshe says that he knew about Morley but had to wait until he showed his hand in an attempt to kill Robert before he could act to stop him. | |
| Starring: | Mark Eden (as Robert Manning), Christopher Lee (as JD Morley), Boris Karloff (as Professor John Marshe), Virginia Wetherell (as Eve Morley), Michael Gough (as Elder, Morley's butler) |
| Featuring: | Barbara Steele (as Lavinia Morley, small role in occult dream scenes only), Rosemarie Reede (as Esther, Robert's secretary at antique shop), Rupert Davies (as Vicar), Roger Avon (as Sergeant Tyson, village policeman), Denys Peek (as Peter Manning, Robert's brother) |
| Starlets: | Nova St. Claire (as Girl in party game car chase) (occult ceremony dream scenes) Vivienne Carlton, Nita Lorraine, Carol Anne, Jenny Shaw, Lita Scott (all minor non-speaking parts) (party girls) Christine Pryor, Kerry Dean, Stephanie Marrion, Rosalind Royale, Millicent Scott, Vicky Richards, Tasma Bereton (all minor non-speaking parts) |
| NOTES: | |
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Virginia Wetherell receives an "introducing" credit |
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The producer's name appears on the credits as Louis M. 'Deke' Heyward |
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Based on a story by Jerry Sohl |
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The version reviewed was a "tame" version in which the party girls and those in the occult rituals are all clothed or covered up even though the high-spirited party games seem intended to be played topless. It is unknown whether a non-tame version of the film was ever released. The only nudity that makes it into the reviewed version of the film is that of Virginia Wetherell - information read elsewhere indicates that a body double was used for the rear nudity moment when she gets out of bed to answer her bedroom door, although the topless bits when she is in bed reading a magazine and later having sex with Robert were clearly played by her. |
| Writer: Henry Younger / Director/Producer: Michael Carreras | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 80 mins |
| In Egypt in the year 1900, a team of archaeologists discover the three thousand year-old tomb of the Egyptian prince Ra-Antef, elder son of the pharaoh Rameses VIII. The expedition is led by Egyptologist Sir Giles Dalrymple who is ably assisted by John Bray and John's French girlfriend Annette Dubois. Annette's father, Professor Eugene Dubois, is also with them but as the story opens he is seen being mercilessly slain by some Arabs.
When the team learn of the professor's death they decide to crate up all the wondrous treasures of the tomb and continue their work cataloguing them in the Cairo museum where the collection is bound. This includes the magnificent sarcophagus containing the shrouded body of the royal prince. Unfortunately their financial backer Alexander King has other ideas. King is a brash American with a keen sense of showmanship and has big plans for the relics. He intends to roadshow them around the world and make a fortune. He rides roughshod over the objections of the Egyptian liaison officer Hashmi Bey whose government only agreed to the excavation on the understanding that any treasures found would be bound for the Cairo museum. Sir Giles unfairly finds himself blacklisted from future undertakings even though he is just as opposed. He resigns from the project and King appoints John Bray to oversee the transportation of the relics to the first exhibition - in England. Before they leave there is a break-in but the only thing stolen is the catalogued list of the tomb's contents. It seems that someone else is keen to know exactly what has been unearthed. On the sea voyage Sir Giles is attacked in his cabin and John is knocked out when he comes to Sir Giles' aid. The assailant is dealt with by another passenger on the voyage who introduces himself as Adam Beauchamp. Adam is a dashing and charming man and Annette is rather taken by him much to John's jealous displeasure. Adam turns out to have a fascination in early Egyptian history himself and starts to involve himself in their activities. Annette relates to Adam what is known about the legend of Ra-Antef. The prince was the elder of two twin brothers who developed into very different characters. Ra became a great thinker, whereas his brother Be enjoyed partaking in sensual pleasures. Ra's intelligence and deep wisdom elevated him in popularity and was his father's favoured son. Be conspired to have Ra accused of witchcraft and such was his success that Rameses had no choice but to banish his favourite son from the kingdom. In the Saharan desert with a small band of followers Ra met with a nomadic people who were sufficiently impressed by him to make him their king. At his investiture they presented him with an ages-old medallion inscribed with the ancient and powerful Words of Life capable of reviving the dead. As Ra's influence grew he made plans to return to his homeland to take back what was rightfully his. But Be learned of his brother's intentions and sent a team of assassins to pre-emptively kill him which they successfully achieved. Ra was given a king's burial in a tomb which would then remain undiscovered for the next three thousand years. Adam had become agitated by the story and wonders what became of the medallion because according to the manifest it wasn't found in the tomb. Annette has a medallion given to her by her father before he died which he had found years before. John wonders if it could be Ra's medallion and takes it away to study the hieroglyphics. But that night as he works at his desk an unknown intruder coshes him and steals the medallion. Alexander King opens his Egyptian exhibit to much pomp making great play of the fabled curse of the mummy's tomb which condemns to death any who defile it. But then when the moment arrives to show off the star attraction and open the ornate coffin for public viewing - the mummy has gone! There follows a series of deaths of expedition members at the hands of the mummy which has come to life. Firstly King is killed and then Sir Giles. It seems that John and Annette will be the next targets. The police try to capture the mummy with a net but it proves too strong and escapes. Annette has by now fallen in love with Adam and has agreed to go away with him on a mysterious trip he says he will shortly be undertaking. He shows her his basement which is decked out like an Egyptian tomb. He says he knows more details of the Ra-Antef legend and reveals some hitherto unknown information. After Ra was murdered Rameses was so upset he had a heart attack. He knew that his other son Be was responsible and so before he died he cursed Be to an everlasting life never able to die other than by the hands of his brother. An ironic codicil that can never come to pass since Ra is already dead. Be finds that thereafter he is unable to die.. Adam then reveals he knows all this because he is Be and has lived throughout the last three millennia. He is weary of the dreadful monotony of life and longs only for the thing he cannot have... death. Adam thought that was an impossible dream until news broke of the discovery of his brother's tomb and he knew that if he could also locate the medallion and recite the ancient Words of Life he could revive his brother Ra and order it to kill him and release him from his woe. But he wants a companion in the afterlife and has chosen Annette to be that one. He summons the mummy of Ra and they all go down into the underground sewer system where Adam orders it to kill Annette first. But Ra will not kill a woman and seeks to protect her instead. It turns on Be and drowns him in the water and Be is finally released from his curse. The mummy then causes the sewer ceiling to collapse and bury itself under the rubble. Annette is found safe and unharmed by John and the police and the danger is over. | |
| Starring: | Ronald Howard (as John Bray, Egyptologist), Fred Clark (as Alexander King, American showman), Terence Morgan (as Adam Beauchamp), Jeanne Roland (as Annette Dubois, John's girlfriend), Jack Gwillim (as Sir Giles Dalrymple, expedition leader), George Pastell (as Hashmi Bey, Egyptian liaison officer) |
| Featuring: | John Paul (as Inspector Mackenzie, London detective), Michael Ripper (as Arab worker), Dickie Owen (as The Mummy), Michael McStay (as Ra-Antef, in flashback, [uncredited]), Bernard Rebel (as Professor Eugene Dubois, Annette's father, [uncredited]) |
| Starlets: | Jill Mai Meredith (as Jenny, Beauchamp's maid), Marianne Stone (as Hashmi Bey's Landlady) |
| NOTES: | |
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Jeanne Roland receives an "introducing" credit |
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This was the second of four films made by Hammer that involved a Mummy. The first was The Mummy (1959). The third was The Mummy's Shroud (1967) and finally Blood From The Mummy's Tomb (1971). Other than the use of a Mummy they have no connection to each other in terms of characters or story continuity. |
| Writers: Blake Edwards, Geoffrey Edwards / Director: Blake Edwards / Producers: Blake Edwards, Tony Adams | |
| Type: Comedy | Running Time: 105 mins |
| Continuing on from the events in Trail of the Pink Panther (1982) ...
It is now a year since the celebrated French detective Jacques Clouseau disappeared while trying to find the stolen Pink Panther diamond and the French public are demanding that the authorities do more to find out what happened to their hero. The French president responds to the outcry by ordering the Sûreté to renew their efforts and tells them that if France's greatest detective is missing then it will take the World's greatest detective to find him. Ironically Chief Inspector Dreyfus is put in charge of choosing the special detective. Dreyfus hates Clouseau and is glad he is no longer around and so finding him would be the last thing he wanted, but he knows he must be seen to follow the president's orders. So he uses a supercomputer to scan all of the world's law enforcement agency records to identify the best deductive mind in the world. However Dreyfus secretly reprograms the computer to reverse the criteria so it selects the very worst candidate. That man is young New York cop Sergeant Clifton Sleigh, who is his superior Lt Palmyra's worst nightmare with his high level of general incompetence in police work. So when the request comes for Sleigh to be assigned special attachment duties with the Sûreté, Lt Palmyra jumps at the opportunity to be rid of his biggest liability. Sleigh heads off to France eager to prove himself on this challenging assignment. France celebrates his appointment believing him to be the best there is as selected by computer. The French mafia become worried that this hotshot detective might actually locate Inspector Clouseau and their current heyday period of criminal activity might once again be curtailed - so they take out a contract on Sleigh's life and send hitmen to eliminate him. Also the president of Lugash is worried that the Pink Panther diamond might be recovered if Clouseau is found and his country would have to pay back the insurance money so he too sends out assassins. Meanwhile at a luxury health spa owned by Countess Chandra we find she is in possession of the Pink Panther diamond. Her houseguest is a man whose head is swathed in bandages possessing a very familiar French accent. It seems that Inspector Clouseau is indeed still alive and has undergone an operation at Countess Chandra's expense in return for not reporting her possession of the diamond which was stolen by one of her agents. Sergeant Sleigh begins his investigations and it soon becomes clear to him that he is being targeted by several parties out to murder him. Fortunately his bumbling good fortune helps him avoid being killed on several occasions. His investigations take him to the home of Sir Charles Litton and his wife Simone where he also meets Litton's nephew George. They tell him how they last met Clouseau while he was investigating the diamond theft a year ago after which he headed for Valencia. Sleigh follows the trail where he comes under more attacks. He is aided by a pretty young woman called Julie Morgan who helps him fight off a Ninja assassin. She is actually Countess Chandra's personal secretary who has been sent to distract Sleigh from his investigations via a romantic diversion. Later, on the run again, Sleigh is helped by George Litton who takes him to the Littons' yacht. They tell Sleigh who Julie is and Sleigh decides to go and see Countess Chandra. The Littons give him a ride out to her island because they are by chance heading that way themselves. Sleigh parasails into the Countess Chandra's establishment and meets her now bandage-free houseguest:- a Frenchman with movie star looks and a curiously accident-prone manner. Chandra tells Sleigh that she did indeed meet Clouseau a year ago. He had wanted to change his appearance so she recommended a plastic surgeon. Sleigh visits the surgeon and is given a photo of Clouseau's new appearance. Later the photo is identified as being an unknown murder victim found almost a year ago. Sleigh reports back to Chief Inspector Dreyfus that unfortunately he has discovered that Clouseau is indeed dead. Dreyfus has checked the victim's fingerprints and knows with regret it was not Clouseau but he keeps that information to himself and congratulates Sleigh on a job well done. Dreyfus has done his duty to the French president and is happy that no one will be looking for Clouseau anymore and he can stay joyfully unfound. Countess Chandra is pleased that her false trail has worked so spectacularly and now she and the real Clouseau, with his new movie star face, can relax and enjoy their fortune together. They decide to go and look at the Pink Panther diamond - but find it gone from her safe with the Phantom's signature glove left in its place! And on the Littons' yacht the Litton trio celebrate the theft of the Pink Panther diamond which Lady Litton stole while staying at the spa as a guest. | |
| Starring: | Ted Wass (as Sergeant Clifton Sleigh, New York cop selected to find Clouseau), Herbert Lom (as Chief Inspector Charles Dreyfus) |
| Featuring: | David Niven (as Sir Charles Litton), Robert Wagner (as George Litton, Sir Charles' nephew), Roger Moore (as Chief Inspector Jacques Clouseau, after plastic surgery, [credited as Turk Thrust II]), Capucine (as Lady Simone Litton, Sir Charles wife and Clouseau's ex-wife), Joanna Lumley (as Countess Chandra), Leslie Ash (as Julie Morgan, Countess Chandra's personal secretary), André Maranne (as Sergeant Francois Duval, Sûreté detective), Robert Loggia (as Bruno Langois, mafia boss), Harvey Korman (as Professor Auguste Balls, costume maker), Burt Kwouk (as Cato Fong, Clouseau's former manservant), Graham Stark (as Waiter), Patricia Davis (as Michelle Chauvin, French TV presenter), Michael Elphick (as Valencia Police Chief), Ed Parker (as Mr Chong, Ninja assassin), William Hootkins (as Taxi Driver), Donald Sumpter (as Dave, computer expert), Harold Kasket (as President Sandover Haleesh of Lugash), Peter Arne (as General Bufoni, military adviser to Lugash president), Liz Smith (as Marta, Professor Balls' wife), Danny Schiller (as Cunny, Professor Balls' assistant) |
| NOTES: | |
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Ted Wass receives an "introducing" credit |
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This was the last film in the original Pink Panther series. The previous film was Trail of the Pink Panther (1982) which told how Inspector Clouseau disappeared (using unused footage of Peter Sellers from other films combined with new scenes featuring his co-stars). That film and this film are closely linked with the story continuing and uses many of the same characters. Peter Sellers does not appear in this film in any archive footage. |
| Writer: John Elder / Director: Terence Fisher / Producer: Anthony Hinds | |
| Type: Horror | Running Time: 89 mins |
| In 18th century Spain a kindly Samaritan's named Don Alfredo Corledo finds a young woman alone in the forest in a very poor state of health and takes her home to care for her. His servant Teresa discovers the girl is pregnant and the baby is born a few months later although the mother dies soon afterwards. Teresa and Corledo act more like a married couple than master and servant and they decide to adopt the baby into their household and bring him up as his Aunt and Uncle - they christen him Leon.
The years pass and Leon is a young boy. Some goats have been savagely killed in the area and the watchman is tasked with killing the animal responsible. The watchman shoots and wounds an animal that night but it gets away. And later back at the Corledo house young Leon has unaccountably picked up a gunshot wound in his leg while supposedly asleep in bed. Leon tells his uncle that every night he has bad dreams of being a wolf but is unaware of actually leaving his room although the wound makes it clear to Corledo that he must do. Corledo shares his concerns with the local priest and the clergyman tells him that animal spirits are known to often enter the human soul at vulnerable time such as birth but usually they dissipate in the child's early years and are completely exorcised by the love, warmth and fellowship that the child is surrounded by. But little Leon's soul is weaker and the animal spirit has taken hold and become prevalent especially during the period of a full moon. The only remedy is an abundance of family love and affection to keep the beast at bay - and one day there will hopefully be the love of a woman to take that place. Corledo and Teresa vow to love him more than ever but as a precaution Corledo adds strong bars to the boy's bedroom window which he tells Leon are to keep the bad dreams away but are really to make sure he can't get out. Meanwhile there is talk in the town of a werewolf being responsible for the animal deaths and the watchman forges some silver bullets from a melted down crucifix. At night he shoots and kills what he thinks is the culprit but finds it is a regular dog. However since this coincides with Leon's inability to leave his room the attacks stop and the matter of the livestock killings is considered satisfactorily resolved by the dog's death - although the watchman keeps a silver bullet as a souvenir. Leon's Aunt and Uncle shower him with love and eventually the bad dreams subside and Leon grows into adulthood with no further incidents with Leon himself having remained unaware that his childhood nightmares had been anything other than bad dreams. It is 13 years later and the adult Leon leaves home and gets a job in a nearby wine merchants where he enjoys good company and his fancy is caught by the daughter of the site manager Cristina and she of him. But it has been arranged for her to marry the owner's son even though he is a man that Cristina does not especially care for. She and Leon begin to see each other in secret and they fall in love. But when he asks her to marry him instead she has to refuse due to family pressures. In his dejected state and on the night of a full moon, feeling unloved, Leon's animal spirit takes hold once more and he transforms into a werewolf and goes on a killing spree. He wakes up in his old bed at uncle's home sweating and unable to remember how he got there. His adopted Uncle sits him down and together with the priest they tell him about his condition and how love is the only cure. He returns back to the wine merchants in an effort to persuade Cristina to marry him and she finally agrees - but then the lawmen arrive and arrest him for the previous night's murders. It is still in the period of the full moon and he knows what will happen while locked in his prison and he makes a plea to be executed before sunset - but the mayor does not believe the story and insists he have a proper trial - Leon makes a special request to his Uncle. Come sunset Leon transforms into the wolf creature and breaks loose and goes on another rampage and his uncle Corledo observing Leon's earlier plea borrows the spare silver bullet from the old watchman and shoots Leon dead. | |
| Comment: The back story of Leon's beggar father and how his mute mother became pregnant is told in the narrative and takes up the first 20 minutes of the film - but to avoid making this review too long I've jumped in at the point when Don Alfredo Coreledo finds the mother in the forest and takes her home to care for her. It is 10 minutes more until the boy Leon is seen and a further 15 minutes until the adult Leon (Oliver Reed) comes into the story (at about 45 minutes into the picture). That's not to say that the preliminaries are uninteresting to watch - it's just that they seem a bit redundant to go into details about here when trying to concisely relay the heart of the story. | |
| Starring: | Oliver Reed (as Leon Corledo), Clifford Evans (as Don Alfredo Corledo), Hira Talfrey (as Teresa, Corledo's "Servant"), Catherine Feller (as Cristina, Leon's sweetheart) |
| Featuring: | Martin Matthews (as Jose, Leon's friend at work), Justin Walters (as Young Leon), John Gabriel (as the Priest), Yvonne Romain (Servant Girl, Leon's mother), Richard Wordsworth (as Beggar, Leon's father), Anthony Dawson (as Marques Siniestro), Warren Mitchell (as the Watchman), Peter Sallis (as The Mayor) |
| Familiar Faces: | Desmond Llewelyn (a footman) |
| Starlets: | Sheila Brennan, Joy Webster, Renny Lister (as young women at tavern) |
| NOTES: | |
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Based on the novel The Werewolf of Paris by Guy Endore. |
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